The Director Welcomes You

The Hospital Obsession Incident

#6e7d03

Location

Cloudless, Sunny Malaysia

Time of Day

5:18

Extraction Point

115 Miles N

Time to Complete

47 Hours

Investigators,
We need your help. Agent Ayden Carroll has gone missing and we believe "Small kobold" is responsible. They were last seen in Malaysia at 10:00. The agent sent one final message – "A shadow passes at the Unicorn Nest". Take this Fluffy Coin - it was their favorite tool and might help you.

— The Tape recorder you were holding self destructs.

The Villain Dossier

Name

Axel Price

Alias

"Small kobold"

Features

4' 4"

Brown eyes

Large deep scar / Left middle finger

Organization

The Commission of Ugliest Servant

Emotions

Worried

Personality

Closely Sovereign

Motive

Make a lot of money to become the best

Bodyguard

Peter the "Curious Pheonix"

Physical Size

Mini

Story

Additional Locations

The Low Isle

Overpopulated Maze

Fury Peninsula

Random Events

Diary Gets their hand chopped off

Potato gathers near a point of interest

Milk Shipment Is frozen into a block of ice

Bank Finds gold in the water

World

Stores

Max's Flower in Vase Ventures

Gutierrez's Creeping Vines Technologies

Garrett's Pocket watch Properties

Carroll's Bench Arcade

Traps

Poisoned Arrow

Large Net of Obsession

Objects

Flower in Vase children's replica

Pocket watch that has been hollowed out

Secret Creeping Vines

Hidden Soy Sauce Packet

Soy Sauce Packet of Obsession

Wand of Wonder

All priestly magic within 500 yards is dispelled

People

Name Codename Career Likes Dislikes
Paisley Gutierrez "Orange Livers" Merchant Hamsters Soap
Ariel Garrett "Golden Knuckles" Mole Children's Stories Video Games
Ruby Washington Exhausted Jigsaw Puzzles Pillows
Max Reeves Secretary Water Technology
Ayden Carroll Townsfolk Broccoli Candles

Cipher



                

                
 
                

                

                

                

                

                

The Fuck Is This?

After years of playing Dungeons & Dragons, I decided to make a variation where everything is improv. The DM knows as much as the players and you tell a story together - sitcom style. We use this site as a quest starter, think of some characters, and see how much we can make each other laugh.

It's designed to be simple, portable, and dependent on being creative & inventive. I wanted a framework to guide the plot forward but let us find the story. This page is just a guide to help the stories become too redundant - take as much as you want, ignore as much as you need. If you want to follow along with our adventures or read some examples, check out my personal story notes.

This concept and site was crafted by Andrew Maruska with linguistic help from Evan Stark

But how?

The Most Important Rule

Be Silly. The goal is to laugh not to have a normal adventure. Someone wants to go to the moon? Fuck yeah they do and we're going to do it with medieval technology.

Set Up

Give the players a home base, a year they want to play in, and some general ownership of the setup. It's more successful when everyone has helped create the world because when a player makes suggestions it's easier to integrate them without feeling too precious. It helps to have a figurehead that assigns the quest to authoritatively start.

Characters

90% of creating a character here is a funny voice you're forced to talk in for 3 hours. I typically have people pick one trait they want to be good at and give them a slight advantage when using that - and the same for a negative trait. Don't overcomplicate it. They wanna be a skateboarder who can't feel love? perfect. +2 to cool & -2 to social acceptance.

Rolling

This can be whatever you want but as a general rule I use d20's as a graded scale. Sometimes, I craft the roll to mimic the action i.e. if they are walking a tight rope then might need to roll a 10 because 20 & 1 make them fall to one side or the other. Rolling in D&D got boring so make it fun again.

Dungeon Master

Your goal is to say 'Yes and...' but realistically it's 'Yes and roll to see if you can actually do that triple backflip down the cliff to mount the attacking phoenix...' - It's okay to make them fail, just don't tell them no. This guide is to help you be 1 step ahead of the players but it can't know the vibe of the room, have some empathy and play to the crowd.

Ending

No one can tell you this. The guide is to help you get 1/3 of the adventure set up and the rest will be created by the adventuring party. Have fun with it and try to tie up some loose ends at the end (or don't and bring them back for another adventure).