The Director Welcomes You

Who is Nancy Jury?

#912210

Location

Arid, Warm Cyprus

Time of Day

21:4

Extraction Point

180 Miles N

Time to Complete

28 Hours

Agents,
This week should be easy. You are delivering a Shelf of alcohol that is glowing. Get to Cyprus at 09:07

Good Luck.

— The Microsoft Zune you were holding self destructs.

The Villain Dossier

Name

Ruby Patton

Alias

"Golden kobold"

Features

6' 3"

Gray eyes

Stretch Marks / Right middle finger

Organization

The Clique of Cheap Safety

Emotions

Insecure

Personality

Loosely Deep

Motive

Make a lot of money because of a betrayal

Bodyguard

Nancy the "Deep Python"

Physical Size

Short

Story

Additional Locations

The Teeny Creek

Overpopulated Grove

Contentment Peninsula

Random Events

Buccaneer stop the party and asks questions

Alligator catches on fire

Box of Cigarette gathers near a point of interest

Hoard scurries by

World

Stores

Jocelyn's Shelf of alcohol Market

Marsh's Notebook Cosmetics

Higgins's Desk Arcade

Lewis's Doorway Emporium

Traps

Phantasmal Killer

Rune of Paralyzation of Irritation

Objects

Shelf of alcohol that is glowing

Desk children's replica

Secret Notebook

Hidden Mace

Credit Card of Irritation

Wand of Wonder

One magic potion nearby will trigger a Chaos Burst when consumed

People

Name Codename Career Likes Dislikes
Dominic Marsh "Dull Muscles" Merchant Candy Stickers
Nora Higgins "Fat Hot Dogs" Mole Batteries Soap
Riley Graham Frustrated Pillows Sponges
Jocelyn Reynolds Shadow Sponges Squirrels
Caroline Lewis Townsfolk Soup Writers

Cipher



                

                
 
                

                

                

                

                

                

The Fuck Is This?

After years of playing Dungeons & Dragons, I decided to make a variation where everything is improv. The DM knows as much as the players and you tell a story together - sitcom style. We use this site as a quest starter, think of some characters, and see how much we can make each other laugh.

It's designed to be simple, portable, and dependent on being creative & inventive. I wanted a framework to guide the plot forward but let us find the story. This page is just a guide to help the stories become too redundant - take as much as you want, ignore as much as you need. If you want to follow along with our adventures or read some examples, check out my personal story notes.

This concept and site was crafted by Andrew Maruska with linguistic help from Evan Stark

But how?

The Most Important Rule

Be Silly. The goal is to laugh not to have a normal adventure. Someone wants to go to the moon? Fuck yeah they do and we're going to do it with medieval technology.

Set Up

Give the players a home base, a year they want to play in, and some general ownership of the setup. It's more successful when everyone has helped create the world because when a player makes suggestions it's easier to integrate them without feeling too precious. It helps to have a figurehead that assigns the quest to authoritatively start.

Characters

90% of creating a character here is a funny voice you're forced to talk in for 3 hours. I typically have people pick one trait they want to be good at and give them a slight advantage when using that - and the same for a negative trait. Don't overcomplicate it. They wanna be a skateboarder who can't feel love? perfect. +2 to cool & -2 to social acceptance.

Rolling

This can be whatever you want but as a general rule I use d20's as a graded scale. Sometimes, I craft the roll to mimic the action i.e. if they are walking a tight rope then might need to roll a 10 because 20 & 1 make them fall to one side or the other. Rolling in D&D got boring so make it fun again.

Dungeon Master

Your goal is to say 'Yes and...' but realistically it's 'Yes and roll to see if you can actually do that triple backflip down the cliff to mount the attacking phoenix...' - It's okay to make them fail, just don't tell them no. This guide is to help you be 1 step ahead of the players but it can't know the vibe of the room, have some empathy and play to the crowd.

Ending

No one can tell you this. The guide is to help you get 1/3 of the adventure set up and the rest will be created by the adventuring party. Have fun with it and try to tie up some loose ends at the end (or don't and bring them back for another adventure).