The Director Welcomes You

Brothers Royale

#ae3e59

Location

Hot, Icy Benin

Time of Day

16:19

Extraction Point

142 Miles NE

Time to Complete

33 Hours

Snoopers,
This week should be easy. You are delivering a Mounted Animal that has been hollowed out. Get to Benin at 13:12

Good Luck.

— The Burner Phone you were holding self destructs.

The Villain Dossier

Name

Brooklyn Black

Alias

"Left Meerkat"

Features

4' 9"

Brown eyes

Stretch Marks / Left arm

Organization

The Board of Large Faucet

Emotions

Horrified

Personality

Lightly Poor

Motive

Disrupt the military to inspire a rebellion

Bodyguard

Jerry the "Chuffed Dolphin"

Physical Size

Shrimpy

Story

Additional Locations

The Fastidious Island

Desolate House

Contentment Festival

Random Events

Herd of Chicken meets disaster

Gallon of Trash is loose

Store is robbed

Carcass Spontaneously disintegrates

World

Stores

Emery's Mounted Animal Brothers

Pham's Bookcase Industries

Garner's Quill and Ink Consulting

Jordan's Pocket watch Solutions

Traps

Lightning Bolt

Portcullis of Cleanliness

Objects

Mounted Animal that has been hollowed out

Quill and Ink that is glowing

Secret Bookcase

Hidden Guthook

Nipple Clamp of Cleanliness

Wand of Wonder

All non-sentient animals nearby are 1d100 years

People

Name Codename Career Likes Dislikes
Daniel Pham "Mad Lox" Merchant Ice Cubes Jazz
Zachary Garner "Silver Scars" Mole Attention Clocks
Guy Joseph Hotel Manager Dinosaurs Money
Emery Frank Intoxicated Snowglobes Chickens
Graham Jordan Shadow Drinking Dolphins

Cipher



                

                
 
                

                

                

                

                

                

The Fuck Is This?

After years of playing Dungeons & Dragons, I decided to make a variation where everything is improv. The DM knows as much as the players and you tell a story together - sitcom style. We use this site as a quest starter, think of some characters, and see how much we can make each other laugh.

It's designed to be simple, portable, and dependent on being creative & inventive. I wanted a framework to guide the plot forward but let us find the story. This page is just a guide to help the stories become too redundant - take as much as you want, ignore as much as you need. If you want to follow along with our adventures or read some examples, check out my personal story notes.

This concept and site was crafted by Andrew Maruska with linguistic help from Evan Stark

But how?

The Most Important Rule

Be Silly. The goal is to laugh not to have a normal adventure. Someone wants to go to the moon? Fuck yeah they do and we're going to do it with medieval technology.

Set Up

Give the players a home base, a year they want to play in, and some general ownership of the setup. It's more successful when everyone has helped create the world because when a player makes suggestions it's easier to integrate them without feeling too precious. It helps to have a figurehead that assigns the quest to authoritatively start.

Characters

90% of creating a character here is a funny voice you're forced to talk in for 3 hours. I typically have people pick one trait they want to be good at and give them a slight advantage when using that - and the same for a negative trait. Don't overcomplicate it. They wanna be a skateboarder who can't feel love? perfect. +2 to cool & -2 to social acceptance.

Rolling

This can be whatever you want but as a general rule I use d20's as a graded scale. Sometimes, I craft the roll to mimic the action i.e. if they are walking a tight rope then might need to roll a 10 because 20 & 1 make them fall to one side or the other. Rolling in D&D got boring so make it fun again.

Dungeon Master

Your goal is to say 'Yes and...' but realistically it's 'Yes and roll to see if you can actually do that triple backflip down the cliff to mount the attacking phoenix...' - It's okay to make them fail, just don't tell them no. This guide is to help you be 1 step ahead of the players but it can't know the vibe of the room, have some empathy and play to the crowd.

Ending

No one can tell you this. The guide is to help you get 1/3 of the adventure set up and the rest will be created by the adventuring party. Have fun with it and try to tie up some loose ends at the end (or don't and bring them back for another adventure).