The Director Welcomes You

Operation — Incendiary Slime

#dd25a2

Location

Calm, Foul Congo, Democratic Republic of the

Time of Day

6:15

Extraction Point

142 Miles W

Time to Complete

19 Hours

Shadows,
As you can see you are trapped inside within a Hidden Water Park . We almost couldn't find you — Please explain when you get back. All we know is "Red Ogre" is responsible and they sent us this message - "A roll of thunder at the Apple Orchard". Your mission was intelligence, achieve what you can.

Hopefully you still have that Angry Balloon hidden on you.

— The iPod you were holding self destructs.

The Villain Dossier

Name

James Sparks

Alias

"Red Ogre"

Features

6' 9"

Amber eyes

Small mole / Right leg

Organization

The Office of Sadistic Crown

Emotions

Resentful

Personality

Tensely Consensual

Motive

Make a lot of money to become famous

Bodyguard

Nicky the "Sweltering Pegasus"

Physical Size

Adult

Story

Additional Locations

The Incendiary City

Polluted Peninsula

Censorship Villa

Random Events

Building scurries by

Box of Cigarette Is hurled at the adventurers

Safe Is throwing a protest

Chunk of Beef emerges

World

Stores

Jasmine's Marionette Technologies

Molina's Pedestal Little shop

Parsons's Counter Hole

Hayes's Doorway Couture

Traps

Black Tentacles

Beehive of Cleanliness

Objects

Marionette with a False bottom

Counter made of heavy metal

Secret Pedestal

Hidden Arrows

Wrench of Cleanliness

Wand of Wonder

Caster’s body appears to have been shredded and reassembled

People

Name Codename Career Likes Dislikes
Thomas Molina "Short Stomachs" Merchant Children's Stories Trucks
Molly Parsons "Fat Hot Dogs" Mole Gym Memberships Physics
Ryker Tyler Zestful Dice Butterflies
Jasmine Steele Geologist Plushies Stickers
James Hayes Professional Cuddler Mirrors Paperclips

Cipher



                


                

                    
                    

                


                

                    
                    
 
                


                

                    
                    

                


                

                    
                    

                


                

                    
                    

                

                
                

                    
                    

                


                

                    
                    

                

              

            

          

        

      

    



    
      
      
 
        

          

            
The Fuck Is This?

          

          

            
            
After years of playing Dungeons & Dragons, I decided to make a variation where everything is improv. The DM knows as much as the players and you tell a story together - sitcom style. We use this site as a quest starter, think of some characters, and see how much we can make each other laugh.

            
            
It's designed to be simple, portable, and dependent on being creative & inventive. I wanted a framework to guide the plot forward but let us find the story. This page is just a guide to help the stories become too redundant - take as much as you want, ignore as much as you need. If you want to follow along with our adventures or read some examples, check out  my personal story notes.

            
            
This concept and site was crafted by Andrew Maruska with linguistic help from Evan Stark

          

        

      

    


    
      
      
 
        

          

            
But how?

          

          
            
            The Most Important Rule
            
Be Silly. The goal is to laugh not to have a normal adventure. Someone wants to go to the moon? Fuck yeah they do and we're going to do it with medieval technology.

            
            Set Up
            
Give the players a home base, a year they want to play in, and some general ownership of the setup. It's more successful when everyone has helped create the world because when a player makes suggestions it's easier to integrate them without feeling too precious. It helps to have a figurehead that assigns the quest to authoritatively start.

            
            Characters
            
90% of creating a character here is a funny voice you're forced to talk in for 3 hours. I typically have people pick one trait they want to be good at and give them a slight advantage when using that - and the same for a negative trait. Don't overcomplicate it. They wanna be a skateboarder who can't feel love? perfect. +2 to cool & -2 to social acceptance. 

            
            Rolling
            
This can be whatever you want but as a general rule I use d20's as a graded scale. Sometimes, I craft the roll to mimic the action i.e. if they are walking a tight rope then might need to roll a 10 because 20 & 1 make them fall to one side or the other. Rolling in D&D got boring so make it fun again. 

            
            Dungeon Master
            
Your goal is to say 'Yes and...' but realistically it's 'Yes and roll to see if you can actually do that triple backflip down the cliff to mount the attacking phoenix...' - It's okay to make them fail, just don't tell them no. This guide is to help you be 1 step ahead of the players but it can't know the vibe of the room, have some empathy and play to the crowd. 

            
            Ending
            
No one can tell you this. The guide is to help you get 1/3 of the adventure set up and the rest will be created by the adventuring party. Have fun with it and try to tie up some loose ends at the end (or don't and bring them back for another adventure).