The Director Welcomes You

The Efficacious Liquid Dilemma

#be7269

Location

Cloudy, Dull Romania

Time of Day

12:53

Extraction Point

175 Miles SEE

Time to Complete

40 Hours

Investigators,
This week should be easy. You are delivering a Globe that is glowing. Get to Romania at 18:12

Good Luck.

— The Messenger Pigeon you were holding self destructs.

The Villain Dossier

Name

Katherine Glover

Alias

"Chunky Demon"

Features

5' 4"

Hazel eyes

Faint curved scar / Left foot

Organization

The Agency of Obtuse Disease

Emotions

Cheerful

Personality

Gracefully Crooked

Motive

Take over a government to become the best

Bodyguard

Nancy the "Jolly Rhinoceroses"

Physical Size

Modest

Story

Additional Locations

The Efficacious Barn Dance

Underwater Festival

Violence Lodge

Random Events

Bank Bursts loudly

Whore Becomes wounded

Princess Is getting confiscated

Donkey Catches leprosy

World

Stores

Autumn's Globe Consulting

Joseph's Paperweight Discount

Mclaughlin's Kitchen knife Labs

Duran's Brass Replica Consulting

Traps

Swinging Block

Blade Barrier of Virtue

Objects

Globe that is glowing

Kitchen knife that is glowing

Secret Paperweight

Hidden Newspaper

Bangle of Virtue

Wand of Wonder

Target teleports to the caster’s location in exactly 24 hours

People

Name Codename Career Likes Dislikes
Dylan Joseph "Black Arms" Merchant Toilets Chili
Hailey Mclaughlin "Drowsy Livers" Mole Photography Harmonica
Cooper Walsh Dietitian Teeth Dice
Autumn Sims Bounty hunter Fire Paper
Alejandro Duran Talent agent Chalk Comic Books

Cipher



                

                
 
                

                

                

                

                

                

The Fuck Is This?

After years of playing Dungeons & Dragons, I decided to make a variation where everything is improv. The DM knows as much as the players and you tell a story together - sitcom style. We use this site as a quest starter, think of some characters, and see how much we can make each other laugh.

It's designed to be simple, portable, and dependent on being creative & inventive. I wanted a framework to guide the plot forward but let us find the story. This page is just a guide to help the stories become too redundant - take as much as you want, ignore as much as you need. If you want to follow along with our adventures or read some examples, check out my personal story notes.

This concept and site was crafted by Andrew Maruska with linguistic help from Evan Stark

But how?

The Most Important Rule

Be Silly. The goal is to laugh not to have a normal adventure. Someone wants to go to the moon? Fuck yeah they do and we're going to do it with medieval technology.

Set Up

Give the players a home base, a year they want to play in, and some general ownership of the setup. It's more successful when everyone has helped create the world because when a player makes suggestions it's easier to integrate them without feeling too precious. It helps to have a figurehead that assigns the quest to authoritatively start.

Characters

90% of creating a character here is a funny voice you're forced to talk in for 3 hours. I typically have people pick one trait they want to be good at and give them a slight advantage when using that - and the same for a negative trait. Don't overcomplicate it. They wanna be a skateboarder who can't feel love? perfect. +2 to cool & -2 to social acceptance.

Rolling

This can be whatever you want but as a general rule I use d20's as a graded scale. Sometimes, I craft the roll to mimic the action i.e. if they are walking a tight rope then might need to roll a 10 because 20 & 1 make them fall to one side or the other. Rolling in D&D got boring so make it fun again.

Dungeon Master

Your goal is to say 'Yes and...' but realistically it's 'Yes and roll to see if you can actually do that triple backflip down the cliff to mount the attacking phoenix...' - It's okay to make them fail, just don't tell them no. This guide is to help you be 1 step ahead of the players but it can't know the vibe of the room, have some empathy and play to the crowd.

Ending

No one can tell you this. The guide is to help you get 1/3 of the adventure set up and the rest will be created by the adventuring party. Have fun with it and try to tie up some loose ends at the end (or don't and bring them back for another adventure).