The Director Welcomes You

Player, Headquarters, Puddle, Spy.

#39f4ae

Location

Gloomy, Mild Benin

Time of Day

17:24

Extraction Point

84 Miles NE

Time to Complete

26 Hours

Informants,
I have sent you to circle a Polluted Shelter to look for a suspect by the name "Small Fairy". This mission is counterintelligence. Their recent activity is concerning and we need you to uncover their plans. We don't know much about their goals but we've intercepted this cryptic message – "A stranger can be seen in the shadows at the Underwater cave".

We're low budget this mission – I've packed a Beautiful Audio Cassette in your kit to help.

— The Burner Phone you were holding self destructs.

The Villain Dossier

Name

Grayson Castillo

Alias

"Small Fairy"

Features

4' 10"

Gray eyes

Small mole / Right eye

Organization

The Office of Hungry Puddle

Emotions

Fearful

Personality

Sharply Rhythmic

Motive

Take over a government for fear of the heroes

Bodyguard

Chuckie the "Prickly Imp"

Physical Size

Small-scale

Story

Additional Locations

The Large Palace

Compact Manor

Irritation Carnival

Random Events

Renaissance Faire explodes

Box of Cigarette Integrates silently into the group

Spice Box strikes the ground

Spice Box catches on fire

World

Stores

Luca's Taxidermy animal Labs

Russell's Counter Bureau

Hart's Plaster Bust Mall

Ross's Trunk Discount

Traps

Dropping Ceiling

Bestow Curse of Optimism

Objects

Taxidermy animal that has been hollowed out

Plaster Bust that is glowing

Secret Counter

Hidden Book

Notebook of Optimism

Wand of Wonder

Any shield held by caster appears to weigh 100 pounds

People

Name Codename Career Likes Dislikes
Harmony Russell "Violet Hearts" Merchant Lamps Paperclips
Adeline Hart "Short Kidneys" Mole Money Butterflies
Mariah Foster Actor Rock n' Roll Washing Machines
Luca Hines Annoyed Books Dinosaurs
Jocelyn Ross Annoyed Football Soccer

Cipher



                

                
 
                

                

                

                

                

                

The Fuck Is This?

After years of playing Dungeons & Dragons, I decided to make a variation where everything is improv. The DM knows as much as the players and you tell a story together - sitcom style. We use this site as a quest starter, think of some characters, and see how much we can make each other laugh.

It's designed to be simple, portable, and dependent on being creative & inventive. I wanted a framework to guide the plot forward but let us find the story. This page is just a guide to help the stories become too redundant - take as much as you want, ignore as much as you need. If you want to follow along with our adventures or read some examples, check out my personal story notes.

This concept and site was crafted by Andrew Maruska with linguistic help from Evan Stark

But how?

The Most Important Rule

Be Silly. The goal is to laugh not to have a normal adventure. Someone wants to go to the moon? Fuck yeah they do and we're going to do it with medieval technology.

Set Up

Give the players a home base, a year they want to play in, and some general ownership of the setup. It's more successful when everyone has helped create the world because when a player makes suggestions it's easier to integrate them without feeling too precious. It helps to have a figurehead that assigns the quest to authoritatively start.

Characters

90% of creating a character here is a funny voice you're forced to talk in for 3 hours. I typically have people pick one trait they want to be good at and give them a slight advantage when using that - and the same for a negative trait. Don't overcomplicate it. They wanna be a skateboarder who can't feel love? perfect. +2 to cool & -2 to social acceptance.

Rolling

This can be whatever you want but as a general rule I use d20's as a graded scale. Sometimes, I craft the roll to mimic the action i.e. if they are walking a tight rope then might need to roll a 10 because 20 & 1 make them fall to one side or the other. Rolling in D&D got boring so make it fun again.

Dungeon Master

Your goal is to say 'Yes and...' but realistically it's 'Yes and roll to see if you can actually do that triple backflip down the cliff to mount the attacking phoenix...' - It's okay to make them fail, just don't tell them no. This guide is to help you be 1 step ahead of the players but it can't know the vibe of the room, have some empathy and play to the crowd.

Ending

No one can tell you this. The guide is to help you get 1/3 of the adventure set up and the rest will be created by the adventuring party. Have fun with it and try to tie up some loose ends at the end (or don't and bring them back for another adventure).