The Director Welcomes You

Thumb, Eggnog, Soiree, Spy.

#2bd766

Location

Stormy, Overcast Qatar

Time of Day

14:55

Extraction Point

41 Miles NNE

Time to Complete

26 Hours

Eyeballs,
We need your help. Agent Aria Bush has gone missing and we believe "Plump Hydra" is responsible. They were last seen in Qatar at 01:23. The agent sent one final message – "The group finds a dollar on the ground at the Frozen palace". Take this Clean Blender - it was their favorite tool and might help you.

— The Microsoft Zune you were holding self destructs.

The Villain Dossier

Name

Nathan Lewis

Alias

"Plump Hydra"

Features

7' 2"

Heterochromia eyes

Large deep scar / Right thumb

Organization

The Firm of Attractive Soiree

Emotions

Resentful

Personality

Truly Dead

Motive

Take over a country justice for a wrong-doing

Bodyguard

Jerry the "Immense Turtle"

Physical Size

Petty

Story

Additional Locations

The Cocky Creek

Abandoned Reef

Indecision Masquerade

Random Events

Jug of Peanut Butter gathers near a point of interest

Chanting Cult Is under a curse

Crowd strikes the ground

Gallon of Trash Bursts loudly

World

Stores

Cole's Music Box Beauty Stop

Sutton's Statue International

Cortez's Window Wardrobe

Bush's Metal chair Discount

Traps

Arrow

Scything Blade of Casualties

Objects

Music Box with a False bottom

Window made of heavy metal

Secret Statue

Hidden Glasses

Shoe of Casualties

Wand of Wonder

Anyone carrying food nearby is swarmed by countless wasps

People

Name Codename Career Likes Dislikes
Ryker Sutton "Silver Cappuccinos" Merchant Socks Lions
Thomas Cortez "Silver Cappuccinos" Mole Dinosaurs Doves
Giovanni Schultz Technician Oranges Horses
Cole Wong Acupuncturist Socks Hammers
Aria Bush Exhilarated Easter Scarves

Cipher



                

                
 
                

                

                

                

                

                

The Fuck Is This?

After years of playing Dungeons & Dragons, I decided to make a variation where everything is improv. The DM knows as much as the players and you tell a story together - sitcom style. We use this site as a quest starter, think of some characters, and see how much we can make each other laugh.

It's designed to be simple, portable, and dependent on being creative & inventive. I wanted a framework to guide the plot forward but let us find the story. This page is just a guide to help the stories become too redundant - take as much as you want, ignore as much as you need. If you want to follow along with our adventures or read some examples, check out my personal story notes.

This concept and site was crafted by Andrew Maruska with linguistic help from Evan Stark

But how?

The Most Important Rule

Be Silly. The goal is to laugh not to have a normal adventure. Someone wants to go to the moon? Fuck yeah they do and we're going to do it with medieval technology.

Set Up

Give the players a home base, a year they want to play in, and some general ownership of the setup. It's more successful when everyone has helped create the world because when a player makes suggestions it's easier to integrate them without feeling too precious. It helps to have a figurehead that assigns the quest to authoritatively start.

Characters

90% of creating a character here is a funny voice you're forced to talk in for 3 hours. I typically have people pick one trait they want to be good at and give them a slight advantage when using that - and the same for a negative trait. Don't overcomplicate it. They wanna be a skateboarder who can't feel love? perfect. +2 to cool & -2 to social acceptance.

Rolling

This can be whatever you want but as a general rule I use d20's as a graded scale. Sometimes, I craft the roll to mimic the action i.e. if they are walking a tight rope then might need to roll a 10 because 20 & 1 make them fall to one side or the other. Rolling in D&D got boring so make it fun again.

Dungeon Master

Your goal is to say 'Yes and...' but realistically it's 'Yes and roll to see if you can actually do that triple backflip down the cliff to mount the attacking phoenix...' - It's okay to make them fail, just don't tell them no. This guide is to help you be 1 step ahead of the players but it can't know the vibe of the room, have some empathy and play to the crowd.

Ending

No one can tell you this. The guide is to help you get 1/3 of the adventure set up and the rest will be created by the adventuring party. Have fun with it and try to tie up some loose ends at the end (or don't and bring them back for another adventure).