The Director Welcomes You

Faucet, Nerve, Toothbrush, Spy.

#eea815

Location

Rainy, Bright Central African Republic

Time of Day

23:31

Extraction Point

159 Miles NWW

Time to Complete

47 Hours

Shadows,
This week should be easy. You are delivering a Candle with a False bottom. Get to Central African Republic at 21:19

Good Luck.

— The Burner Phone you were holding self destructs.

The Villain Dossier

Name

Willow Robles

Alias

"Five Bat"

Features

6' 11"

Amber eyes

Large deep scar / Left hand

Organization

The Clique of Fulsome Toothbrush

Emotions

Hostile

Personality

Quickly Abundant

Motive

Disrupt the military for fear of the heroes

Bodyguard

Prince the "Chewy Imp"

Physical Size

Scanty

Story

Additional Locations

The Scrawny Forest

Compact Chateau

Secrecy Carousal

Random Events

Chanting Cult Glistens gently

Chunk of Beef explodes

Pine Branch Protests

Bag of Lemons Lunges at the group

World

Stores

Isabelle's Candle Department store

Ryan's Sink Couture

Rhodes's Window Beauty Stop

Wolfe's Coat Warehouse

Traps

Suspicious door with lock

Built-to-Collapse Wall of Annihilation

Objects

Candle with a False bottom

Window that has been hollowed out

Secret Sink

Hidden Bow

Collar of Annihilation

Wand of Wonder

When caster next enters a town, he’s imprisoned for murder

People

Name Codename Career Likes Dislikes
Maximus Ryan "One Ribs" Merchant Jigsaw Puzzles Bears
Raelynn Rhodes "Quiet Cheesecakes" Mole Singing Lipstick
Adrian Harris Old Man Lipstick Soda
Isabelle Parker Dog surfing instructor Doors Deodorant
Joel Wolfe Consultant Easter Deodorant

Cipher



                

                
 
                

                

                

                

                

                

The Fuck Is This?

After years of playing Dungeons & Dragons, I decided to make a variation where everything is improv. The DM knows as much as the players and you tell a story together - sitcom style. We use this site as a quest starter, think of some characters, and see how much we can make each other laugh.

It's designed to be simple, portable, and dependent on being creative & inventive. I wanted a framework to guide the plot forward but let us find the story. This page is just a guide to help the stories become too redundant - take as much as you want, ignore as much as you need. If you want to follow along with our adventures or read some examples, check out my personal story notes.

This concept and site was crafted by Andrew Maruska with linguistic help from Evan Stark

But how?

The Most Important Rule

Be Silly. The goal is to laugh not to have a normal adventure. Someone wants to go to the moon? Fuck yeah they do and we're going to do it with medieval technology.

Set Up

Give the players a home base, a year they want to play in, and some general ownership of the setup. It's more successful when everyone has helped create the world because when a player makes suggestions it's easier to integrate them without feeling too precious. It helps to have a figurehead that assigns the quest to authoritatively start.

Characters

90% of creating a character here is a funny voice you're forced to talk in for 3 hours. I typically have people pick one trait they want to be good at and give them a slight advantage when using that - and the same for a negative trait. Don't overcomplicate it. They wanna be a skateboarder who can't feel love? perfect. +2 to cool & -2 to social acceptance.

Rolling

This can be whatever you want but as a general rule I use d20's as a graded scale. Sometimes, I craft the roll to mimic the action i.e. if they are walking a tight rope then might need to roll a 10 because 20 & 1 make them fall to one side or the other. Rolling in D&D got boring so make it fun again.

Dungeon Master

Your goal is to say 'Yes and...' but realistically it's 'Yes and roll to see if you can actually do that triple backflip down the cliff to mount the attacking phoenix...' - It's okay to make them fail, just don't tell them no. This guide is to help you be 1 step ahead of the players but it can't know the vibe of the room, have some empathy and play to the crowd.

Ending

No one can tell you this. The guide is to help you get 1/3 of the adventure set up and the rest will be created by the adventuring party. Have fun with it and try to tie up some loose ends at the end (or don't and bring them back for another adventure).