The Director Welcomes You
Threads Royale
#65e404
Investigators, As you can see you are trapped inside within a Archaic Arcade . We almost couldn't find you — Please explain when you get back. All we know is "Big Pheonix" is responsible and they sent us this message - "The group finds a sword in a stone at the Snowy garrison". Your mission was black bag, achieve what you can.
Hopefully you still have that Bulbous Stapler hidden on you.
— The Microsoft Zune you were holding self destructs.
Norah Hanson
"Big Pheonix"
4' 10"
Amber eyes
Large deep scar / Right foot
The Community of Drab Mimosa
Attraction
Unabashedly Mecha
Take over a country to escape their destiny
Sam the "Rare Platypuses"
Considerable
The Numerous Jungle
Ancient Citadel
Redemption Grove
Potato screams at the top of their lungs
Gypsy Skips merrily
Dozen Eggs stop the party and asks questions
Toilet Calls menacingly
Jasper's Wingback chair Threads
Olson's Barrel Outlet
Schmidt's Hose Du jour
Kim's Hatrack Hole
Poisoned Arrow
Falling Block of Instability
Wingback chair that is glowing
Hose with a False bottom
Secret Barrel
Hidden Rock
Camera of Instability
Target is sheathed in a large, living sponge
| Name | Codename | Career | Likes | Dislikes |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| Theodore Olson | "Violet Fingers" | Merchant | Whipped Cream | Coffee |
| John Schmidt | "Green Pinky's" | Mole | Easter | Chalk |
| James Osborne | Midwife | Teeth | Sun Glasses | |
| Jasper Goodman | Scientist | Rubber Bands | Glitter | |
| Jackson Kim | Scientist | Bears | Rock n' Roll |
After years of playing Dungeons & Dragons, I decided to make a variation where everything is improv. The DM knows as much as the players and you tell a story together - sitcom style. We use this site as a quest starter, think of some characters, and see how much we can make each other laugh.
It's designed to be simple, portable, and dependent on being creative & inventive. I wanted a framework to guide the plot forward but let us find the story. This page is just a guide to help the stories become too redundant - take as much as you want, ignore as much as you need. If you want to follow along with our adventures or read some examples, check out my personal story notes.
This concept and site was crafted by Andrew Maruska with linguistic help from Evan Stark
Be Silly. The goal is to laugh not to have a normal adventure. Someone wants to go to the moon? Fuck yeah they do and we're going to do it with medieval technology.
Set UpGive the players a home base, a year they want to play in, and some general ownership of the setup. It's more successful when everyone has helped create the world because when a player makes suggestions it's easier to integrate them without feeling too precious. It helps to have a figurehead that assigns the quest to authoritatively start.
Characters90% of creating a character here is a funny voice you're forced to talk in for 3 hours. I typically have people pick one trait they want to be good at and give them a slight advantage when using that - and the same for a negative trait. Don't overcomplicate it. They wanna be a skateboarder who can't feel love? perfect. +2 to cool & -2 to social acceptance.
RollingThis can be whatever you want but as a general rule I use d20's as a graded scale. Sometimes, I craft the roll to mimic the action i.e. if they are walking a tight rope then might need to roll a 10 because 20 & 1 make them fall to one side or the other. Rolling in D&D got boring so make it fun again.
Dungeon MasterYour goal is to say 'Yes and...' but realistically it's 'Yes and roll to see if you can actually do that triple backflip down the cliff to mount the attacking phoenix...' - It's okay to make them fail, just don't tell them no. This guide is to help you be 1 step ahead of the players but it can't know the vibe of the room, have some empathy and play to the crowd.
EndingNo one can tell you this. The guide is to help you get 1/3 of the adventure set up and the rest will be created by the adventuring party. Have fun with it and try to tie up some loose ends at the end (or don't and bring them back for another adventure).