The Director Welcomes You

Operation — Billions Oven

#6b9dfb

Location

Dry, Windy Ukraine

Time of Day

10:30

Extraction Point

21 Miles E

Time to Complete

20 Hours

Agents,
It seems "All Succubus" has gone level 1. They have been broadcasting this message "A white horse dashes past at the Rainbow Mountain". We need you to eliminate them, Scarily. Their last known location was recorded at 00:20. You have a Glowing Paint as a last resort. Use carefully.

— The Vinyl record player you were holding self destructs.

The Villain Dossier

Name

Carter Glover

Alias

"All Succubus"

Features

7' 3"

Hazel eyes

Large deep scar / Left eye

Organization

The Division of Short Bong

Emotions

Relieved

Personality

Scarily Wide

Motive

Take over a country justice for a wrong-doing

Bodyguard

Al the "Thundering Seal"

Physical Size

Insignificant

Story

Additional Locations

The Billions Shelter

Compact Pond

Extinction Sanctuary

Random Events

Fairy Strikes the church bell

Cauldron Ignites violently

Gypsy emerges

Diary is robbed

World

Stores

Kevin's Rug Labs

Conner's Kitchen table Bazaar

Powell's Fire poker set Factory

Herrera's Crock Unlimited

Traps

Camouflaged Pit

Arrow of Obliteration

Objects

Rug children's replica

Fire poker set with a False bottom

Secret Kitchen table

Hidden Crossbow

Arrows of Obliteration

Wand of Wonder

Target sprouts an intelligent fungus atop his head

People

Name Codename Career Likes Dislikes
Oscar Conner "White Brains" Merchant Shirts Technology
Patrick Powell "Two Noses" Mole Soap Technology
Melanie Patton Musician Water Candy
Kevin Hogan Dentist Physics Essential Oils
Emery Herrera Plumber Singing Easter

Cipher



                

                
 
                

                

                

                

                

                

The Fuck Is This?

After years of playing Dungeons & Dragons, I decided to make a variation where everything is improv. The DM knows as much as the players and you tell a story together - sitcom style. We use this site as a quest starter, think of some characters, and see how much we can make each other laugh.

It's designed to be simple, portable, and dependent on being creative & inventive. I wanted a framework to guide the plot forward but let us find the story. This page is just a guide to help the stories become too redundant - take as much as you want, ignore as much as you need. If you want to follow along with our adventures or read some examples, check out my personal story notes.

This concept and site was crafted by Andrew Maruska with linguistic help from Evan Stark

But how?

The Most Important Rule

Be Silly. The goal is to laugh not to have a normal adventure. Someone wants to go to the moon? Fuck yeah they do and we're going to do it with medieval technology.

Set Up

Give the players a home base, a year they want to play in, and some general ownership of the setup. It's more successful when everyone has helped create the world because when a player makes suggestions it's easier to integrate them without feeling too precious. It helps to have a figurehead that assigns the quest to authoritatively start.

Characters

90% of creating a character here is a funny voice you're forced to talk in for 3 hours. I typically have people pick one trait they want to be good at and give them a slight advantage when using that - and the same for a negative trait. Don't overcomplicate it. They wanna be a skateboarder who can't feel love? perfect. +2 to cool & -2 to social acceptance.

Rolling

This can be whatever you want but as a general rule I use d20's as a graded scale. Sometimes, I craft the roll to mimic the action i.e. if they are walking a tight rope then might need to roll a 10 because 20 & 1 make them fall to one side or the other. Rolling in D&D got boring so make it fun again.

Dungeon Master

Your goal is to say 'Yes and...' but realistically it's 'Yes and roll to see if you can actually do that triple backflip down the cliff to mount the attacking phoenix...' - It's okay to make them fail, just don't tell them no. This guide is to help you be 1 step ahead of the players but it can't know the vibe of the room, have some empathy and play to the crowd.

Ending

No one can tell you this. The guide is to help you get 1/3 of the adventure set up and the rest will be created by the adventuring party. Have fun with it and try to tie up some loose ends at the end (or don't and bring them back for another adventure).