The Director Welcomes You

Beauty Stop Royale

#33773c

Location

Mild, Chilly Tajikistan

Time of Day

9:35

Extraction Point

95 Miles W

Time to Complete

3 Hours

Snoopers,
As you can see you are trapped inside within earshot of a Polluted Park . We almost couldn't find you — Please explain when you get back. All we know is "Yellow Wraith" is responsible and they sent us this message - "A stranger can be seen in the shadows at the Turtle Rock". Your mission was intelligence, achieve what you can.

Hopefully you still have that Evil Cigarette hidden on you.

— The Messenger Pigeon you were holding self destructs.

The Villain Dossier

Name

Valeria Freeman

Alias

"Yellow Wraith"

Features

5' 4"

Gray eyes

Small mole / Left thumb

Organization

The Division of Broken Prince

Emotions

Safe

Personality

Well Loquacious

Motive

Take over a country to please their master

Bodyguard

Crystal the "Facetious Orcs"

Physical Size

Cramped

Story

Additional Locations

The Gifted Pond

Ancient Carnival

Reservation Lodge

Random Events

Wanderer grabs a lady's purse

Butter Shipment arrives in the mail

Water Vessel explodes

Keg Evades the law

World

Stores

Harper's Portrait Beauty Stop

Gregory's Chair Specialities

Alvarez's Statuette Mall

McBride's Trophy Unlimited

Traps

Bestow Curse

Wall Blade of Redemption

Objects

Portrait with a False bottom

Statuette that has been hollowed out

Secret Chair

Hidden Sabre

Coif of Redemption

Wand of Wonder

Caster flees this spot and can’t return for at least one year

People

Name Codename Career Likes Dislikes
Josiah Gregory "Dull Lox" Merchant Sailboats Cellphones
Isabel Alvarez "All Arms" Mole Contracts Rabbits
Jonah Goodwin Professional Cuddler Lions Children's Stories
Harper McCarthy Journalist Soccer Baseball
Jude McBride Psychiatrist Painting Acorns

Cipher



                

                
 
                

                

                

                

                

                

The Fuck Is This?

After years of playing Dungeons & Dragons, I decided to make a variation where everything is improv. The DM knows as much as the players and you tell a story together - sitcom style. We use this site as a quest starter, think of some characters, and see how much we can make each other laugh.

It's designed to be simple, portable, and dependent on being creative & inventive. I wanted a framework to guide the plot forward but let us find the story. This page is just a guide to help the stories become too redundant - take as much as you want, ignore as much as you need. If you want to follow along with our adventures or read some examples, check out my personal story notes.

This concept and site was crafted by Andrew Maruska with linguistic help from Evan Stark

But how?

The Most Important Rule

Be Silly. The goal is to laugh not to have a normal adventure. Someone wants to go to the moon? Fuck yeah they do and we're going to do it with medieval technology.

Set Up

Give the players a home base, a year they want to play in, and some general ownership of the setup. It's more successful when everyone has helped create the world because when a player makes suggestions it's easier to integrate them without feeling too precious. It helps to have a figurehead that assigns the quest to authoritatively start.

Characters

90% of creating a character here is a funny voice you're forced to talk in for 3 hours. I typically have people pick one trait they want to be good at and give them a slight advantage when using that - and the same for a negative trait. Don't overcomplicate it. They wanna be a skateboarder who can't feel love? perfect. +2 to cool & -2 to social acceptance.

Rolling

This can be whatever you want but as a general rule I use d20's as a graded scale. Sometimes, I craft the roll to mimic the action i.e. if they are walking a tight rope then might need to roll a 10 because 20 & 1 make them fall to one side or the other. Rolling in D&D got boring so make it fun again.

Dungeon Master

Your goal is to say 'Yes and...' but realistically it's 'Yes and roll to see if you can actually do that triple backflip down the cliff to mount the attacking phoenix...' - It's okay to make them fail, just don't tell them no. This guide is to help you be 1 step ahead of the players but it can't know the vibe of the room, have some empathy and play to the crowd.

Ending

No one can tell you this. The guide is to help you get 1/3 of the adventure set up and the rest will be created by the adventuring party. Have fun with it and try to tie up some loose ends at the end (or don't and bring them back for another adventure).