The Director Welcomes You

Who is Nick Cleaver?

#921de7

Location

Balmy, Calm Colombia

Time of Day

24:8

Extraction Point

1 Miles NNE

Time to Complete

25 Hours

Undercover Emissaries,
We need your help. Agent Cecilia Nunez has gone missing and we believe "Silver Succubus" is responsible. They were last seen in Colombia at 03:06. The agent sent one final message – "The group finds a dollar on the ground at the Apple Orchard". Take this Soft Scissor - it was their favorite tool and might help you.

— The Tablet of Stone you were holding self destructs.

The Villain Dossier

Name

Asher Chavez

Alias

"Silver Succubus"

Features

4' 2"

Amber eyes

Faint curved scar / Left foot

Organization

The Brotherhood of Odd Sphincter

Emotions

Inferior

Personality

Lovingly Vast

Motive

Make a lot of money for fear of the heroes

Bodyguard

Nick the "Gigantic Kangaroos"

Physical Size

Toy

Story

Additional Locations

The Elevated Port

Archaic Castle

Obsession Park

Random Events

Dozen Eggs Crashes slowly

Bard Is being tortured

Milk Shipment overflows

Safe Bounces oddly

World

Stores

Samantha's Portrait Arcade

Bowman's Bonsai Mall

Schroeder's Rubber Plant Boutique

Nunez's Bonsai International

Traps

Extended Bane

Fusillade of Darts of Redemption

Objects

Portrait that is glowing

Rubber Plant that is glowing

Secret Bonsai

Hidden Arrows

Collar of Redemption

Wand of Wonder

Target’s head is enclosed in an indestructible helmet

People

Name Codename Career Likes Dislikes
Everly Bowman "No Hot Dogs" Merchant Sticky Notes Dinosaurs
Andrea Schroeder "Three Stomachs" Mole Cartography Flowers
Brooklyn Sanchez Dog surfing instructor Tigers Television
Samantha Cohen Librarian Paperclips Baseball
Cecilia Nunez Counselor Peanut Butter Doves

Cipher



                

                
 
                

                

                

                

                

                

The Fuck Is This?

After years of playing Dungeons & Dragons, I decided to make a variation where everything is improv. The DM knows as much as the players and you tell a story together - sitcom style. We use this site as a quest starter, think of some characters, and see how much we can make each other laugh.

It's designed to be simple, portable, and dependent on being creative & inventive. I wanted a framework to guide the plot forward but let us find the story. This page is just a guide to help the stories become too redundant - take as much as you want, ignore as much as you need. If you want to follow along with our adventures or read some examples, check out my personal story notes.

This concept and site was crafted by Andrew Maruska with linguistic help from Evan Stark

But how?

The Most Important Rule

Be Silly. The goal is to laugh not to have a normal adventure. Someone wants to go to the moon? Fuck yeah they do and we're going to do it with medieval technology.

Set Up

Give the players a home base, a year they want to play in, and some general ownership of the setup. It's more successful when everyone has helped create the world because when a player makes suggestions it's easier to integrate them without feeling too precious. It helps to have a figurehead that assigns the quest to authoritatively start.

Characters

90% of creating a character here is a funny voice you're forced to talk in for 3 hours. I typically have people pick one trait they want to be good at and give them a slight advantage when using that - and the same for a negative trait. Don't overcomplicate it. They wanna be a skateboarder who can't feel love? perfect. +2 to cool & -2 to social acceptance.

Rolling

This can be whatever you want but as a general rule I use d20's as a graded scale. Sometimes, I craft the roll to mimic the action i.e. if they are walking a tight rope then might need to roll a 10 because 20 & 1 make them fall to one side or the other. Rolling in D&D got boring so make it fun again.

Dungeon Master

Your goal is to say 'Yes and...' but realistically it's 'Yes and roll to see if you can actually do that triple backflip down the cliff to mount the attacking phoenix...' - It's okay to make them fail, just don't tell them no. This guide is to help you be 1 step ahead of the players but it can't know the vibe of the room, have some empathy and play to the crowd.

Ending

No one can tell you this. The guide is to help you get 1/3 of the adventure set up and the rest will be created by the adventuring party. Have fun with it and try to tie up some loose ends at the end (or don't and bring them back for another adventure).