The Director Welcomes You

Who is Tony Butter?

#20f6f4

Location

Frigid, Bright Azerbaijan

Time of Day

23:13

Extraction Point

105 Miles SW

Time to Complete

47 Hours

Silent Negotiators,
As you can see you are trapped inside circle a Touristy Mansion . We almost couldn't find you — Please explain when you get back. All we know is "King Gargoyle" is responsible and they sent us this message - "A vagrant asks for food at the Grey Hollow". Your mission was counterintelligence, achieve what you can.

Hopefully you still have that Dull Chewing Gum hidden on you.

— The Microsoft Zune you were holding self destructs.

The Villain Dossier

Name

Emery Richardson

Alias

"King Gargoyle"

Features

6' 6"

Green eyes

Small mole / Neck

Organization

The Office of Wide Change

Emotions

Vengeful

Personality

Diligently Ugliest

Motive

Take over a government justice for a wrong-doing

Bodyguard

Tony the "Vast Turtle"

Physical Size

Microscopic

Story

Additional Locations

The Caustic Crypt

Abandoned Suburbs

Indecision Lagoon

Random Events

Whore emerges

Demon arrives in the mail

Jug of Peanut Butter Spontaneously disintegrates

Prostitute Integrates silently into the group

World

Stores

Alaina's Ring Du jour

Rivera's Flower in Vase Outlet

Little's Cabinet Threads

Campos's Tea Pot Technologies

Traps

Acid Fog

Bricks from Ceiling of Cheer

Objects

Ring that is glowing

Cabinet that has been hollowed out

Secret Flower in Vase

Hidden Camera

Trident of Cheer

Wand of Wonder

Caster is trapped in a column of brackish water for 1d4 rounds

People

Name Codename Career Likes Dislikes
Annabelle Rivera "Green Toes" Merchant Lamps Sharks
Aaron Little "The Bones" Mole Tigers Photography
Giovanni Ferguson Electrician Children's Stories Basketball
Alaina Castillo Exhausted Dinosaurs Bells
Lincoln Campos Talent agent Scarves Mirrors

Cipher



                

                
 
                

                

                

                

                

                

The Fuck Is This?

After years of playing Dungeons & Dragons, I decided to make a variation where everything is improv. The DM knows as much as the players and you tell a story together - sitcom style. We use this site as a quest starter, think of some characters, and see how much we can make each other laugh.

It's designed to be simple, portable, and dependent on being creative & inventive. I wanted a framework to guide the plot forward but let us find the story. This page is just a guide to help the stories become too redundant - take as much as you want, ignore as much as you need. If you want to follow along with our adventures or read some examples, check out my personal story notes.

This concept and site was crafted by Andrew Maruska with linguistic help from Evan Stark

But how?

The Most Important Rule

Be Silly. The goal is to laugh not to have a normal adventure. Someone wants to go to the moon? Fuck yeah they do and we're going to do it with medieval technology.

Set Up

Give the players a home base, a year they want to play in, and some general ownership of the setup. It's more successful when everyone has helped create the world because when a player makes suggestions it's easier to integrate them without feeling too precious. It helps to have a figurehead that assigns the quest to authoritatively start.

Characters

90% of creating a character here is a funny voice you're forced to talk in for 3 hours. I typically have people pick one trait they want to be good at and give them a slight advantage when using that - and the same for a negative trait. Don't overcomplicate it. They wanna be a skateboarder who can't feel love? perfect. +2 to cool & -2 to social acceptance.

Rolling

This can be whatever you want but as a general rule I use d20's as a graded scale. Sometimes, I craft the roll to mimic the action i.e. if they are walking a tight rope then might need to roll a 10 because 20 & 1 make them fall to one side or the other. Rolling in D&D got boring so make it fun again.

Dungeon Master

Your goal is to say 'Yes and...' but realistically it's 'Yes and roll to see if you can actually do that triple backflip down the cliff to mount the attacking phoenix...' - It's okay to make them fail, just don't tell them no. This guide is to help you be 1 step ahead of the players but it can't know the vibe of the room, have some empathy and play to the crowd.

Ending

No one can tell you this. The guide is to help you get 1/3 of the adventure set up and the rest will be created by the adventuring party. Have fun with it and try to tie up some loose ends at the end (or don't and bring them back for another adventure).