The Director Welcomes You

The Necklace Annihilation Incident

#0bdcc7

Location

Windy, Overcast Korea, North

Time of Day

24:47

Extraction Point

93 Miles SW

Time to Complete

2 Hours

Ambassadors,
It seems "Violet Ogre" has gone level 2. They have been broadcasting this message "The group finds a random cow at the witch's mound". We need you to eliminate them, Miserably. Their last known location was recorded at 23:14. You have a Soft Spoon as a last resort. Use carefully.

— The Portable Radio you were holding self destructs.

The Villain Dossier

Name

Christopher Stone

Alias

"Violet Ogre"

Features

6' 5"

Amber eyes

Faint curved scar / Left thumb

Organization

The Agency of Steep Poodle

Emotions

Brave

Personality

Miserably Good

Motive

Take over a government to achieve their destiny

Bodyguard

Nicky the "Unsightly Doppelganger"

Physical Size

Miniature

Story

Additional Locations

The Sinful Acropolis

Polluted Sanctuary

Pleasure Masquerade

Random Events

Potato Attempts to rob a bank

Donkey Is being detained

Prostitute Ignites violently

Thief emerges

World

Stores

Maxwell's Musical instrument Ventures

Barton's Pipe Beauty Stop

Lloyd's Bench Logistics

Ramirez's Watch Hole

Traps

Reverse Gravity

Javelin of Annihilation

Objects

Musical instrument that has been hollowed out

Bench with a False bottom

Secret Pipe

Hidden File

Diary of Annihilation

Wand of Wonder

When caster next uses magic, he reeks of sulfur for 1d10 hours 3885 When caster next uses magic, he teleports 10d10 yards randomly

People

Name Codename Career Likes Dislikes
Ruby Barton "Quiet Brains" Merchant Limes Oranges
Jonah Lloyd "Wild Hands" Mole Hamsters Slippers
Ayden Leonard Intoxicated Rubber Bands Limes
Maxwell Cole Annoyed Houses Christmas
Reese Ramirez Surveyor Honey Basketball

Cipher



                


                

                    
                    

                


                

                    
                    
 
                


                

                    
                    

                


                

                    
                    

                


                

                    
                    

                

                
                

                    
                    

                


                

                    
                    

                

              

            

          

        

      

    



    
      
      
 
        

          

            
The Fuck Is This?

          

          

            
            
After years of playing Dungeons & Dragons, I decided to make a variation where everything is improv. The DM knows as much as the players and you tell a story together - sitcom style. We use this site as a quest starter, think of some characters, and see how much we can make each other laugh.

            
            
It's designed to be simple, portable, and dependent on being creative & inventive. I wanted a framework to guide the plot forward but let us find the story. This page is just a guide to help the stories become too redundant - take as much as you want, ignore as much as you need. If you want to follow along with our adventures or read some examples, check out  my personal story notes.

            
            
This concept and site was crafted by Andrew Maruska with linguistic help from Evan Stark

          

        

      

    


    
      
      
 
        

          

            
But how?

          

          
            
            The Most Important Rule
            
Be Silly. The goal is to laugh not to have a normal adventure. Someone wants to go to the moon? Fuck yeah they do and we're going to do it with medieval technology.

            
            Set Up
            
Give the players a home base, a year they want to play in, and some general ownership of the setup. It's more successful when everyone has helped create the world because when a player makes suggestions it's easier to integrate them without feeling too precious. It helps to have a figurehead that assigns the quest to authoritatively start.

            
            Characters
            
90% of creating a character here is a funny voice you're forced to talk in for 3 hours. I typically have people pick one trait they want to be good at and give them a slight advantage when using that - and the same for a negative trait. Don't overcomplicate it. They wanna be a skateboarder who can't feel love? perfect. +2 to cool & -2 to social acceptance. 

            
            Rolling
            
This can be whatever you want but as a general rule I use d20's as a graded scale. Sometimes, I craft the roll to mimic the action i.e. if they are walking a tight rope then might need to roll a 10 because 20 & 1 make them fall to one side or the other. Rolling in D&D got boring so make it fun again. 

            
            Dungeon Master
            
Your goal is to say 'Yes and...' but realistically it's 'Yes and roll to see if you can actually do that triple backflip down the cliff to mount the attacking phoenix...' - It's okay to make them fail, just don't tell them no. This guide is to help you be 1 step ahead of the players but it can't know the vibe of the room, have some empathy and play to the crowd. 

            
            Ending
            
No one can tell you this. The guide is to help you get 1/3 of the adventure set up and the rest will be created by the adventuring party. Have fun with it and try to tie up some loose ends at the end (or don't and bring them back for another adventure).