The Director Welcomes You

The Game Passion Incident

#165a79

Location

Balmy, Foul East Timor

Time of Day

10:3

Extraction Point

71 Miles N

Time to Complete

8 Hours

Sleuths,
As you can see you are trapped inside approach a Compact Park . We almost couldn't find you — Please explain when you get back. All we know is "All Goblins" is responsible and they sent us this message - "A pool of blood at the Ghost Town". Your mission was black bag, achieve what you can.

Hopefully you still have that Feminine Lipstick hidden on you.

— The Microsoft Zune you were holding self destructs.

The Villain Dossier

Name

Jade Page

Alias

"All Goblins"

Features

4' 6"

Hazel eyes

Small mole / Left hand

Organization

The Bureau of Tasty Hook

Emotions

Calm

Personality

Wrongly Holy

Motive

Take over a country to be left alone

Bodyguard

Bobby the "Dirty Rabbit"

Physical Size

Towering

Story

Additional Locations

The Sharp Jungle

Ancient Forge

Silence Villa

Random Events

Nomad Skips merrily

Buccaneer Strikes the church bell

Hound Is being tortured

Keg Is being kidnapped

World

Stores

Khloe's Hatrack Unlimited

Gregory's Bible Market

Knight's Mirror Solutions

Bradley's Hose Warehouse

Traps

Suspicious door with lock

Built-to-Collapse Wall of Passion

Objects

Hatrack children's replica

Mirror made of heavy metal

Secret Bible

Hidden Frying Pan

Bottle of Passion

Wand of Wonder

Caster feels powerless unless everyone knows he’s a magic user

People

Name Codename Career Likes Dislikes
George Gregory "Chunky Eyes" Merchant Ice Cubes Soup
Cecilia Knight "Blue Falafels" Mole Jazz Squirrels
Aaron Hammond Meteorologist Chickens Chalk
Khloe Bishop Dentist Limes Jigsaw Puzzles
Kinsley Bradley Lawyer Sun Glasses Television

Cipher



                

                
 
                

                

                

                

                

                

The Fuck Is This?

After years of playing Dungeons & Dragons, I decided to make a variation where everything is improv. The DM knows as much as the players and you tell a story together - sitcom style. We use this site as a quest starter, think of some characters, and see how much we can make each other laugh.

It's designed to be simple, portable, and dependent on being creative & inventive. I wanted a framework to guide the plot forward but let us find the story. This page is just a guide to help the stories become too redundant - take as much as you want, ignore as much as you need. If you want to follow along with our adventures or read some examples, check out my personal story notes.

This concept and site was crafted by Andrew Maruska with linguistic help from Evan Stark

But how?

The Most Important Rule

Be Silly. The goal is to laugh not to have a normal adventure. Someone wants to go to the moon? Fuck yeah they do and we're going to do it with medieval technology.

Set Up

Give the players a home base, a year they want to play in, and some general ownership of the setup. It's more successful when everyone has helped create the world because when a player makes suggestions it's easier to integrate them without feeling too precious. It helps to have a figurehead that assigns the quest to authoritatively start.

Characters

90% of creating a character here is a funny voice you're forced to talk in for 3 hours. I typically have people pick one trait they want to be good at and give them a slight advantage when using that - and the same for a negative trait. Don't overcomplicate it. They wanna be a skateboarder who can't feel love? perfect. +2 to cool & -2 to social acceptance.

Rolling

This can be whatever you want but as a general rule I use d20's as a graded scale. Sometimes, I craft the roll to mimic the action i.e. if they are walking a tight rope then might need to roll a 10 because 20 & 1 make them fall to one side or the other. Rolling in D&D got boring so make it fun again.

Dungeon Master

Your goal is to say 'Yes and...' but realistically it's 'Yes and roll to see if you can actually do that triple backflip down the cliff to mount the attacking phoenix...' - It's okay to make them fail, just don't tell them no. This guide is to help you be 1 step ahead of the players but it can't know the vibe of the room, have some empathy and play to the crowd.

Ending

No one can tell you this. The guide is to help you get 1/3 of the adventure set up and the rest will be created by the adventuring party. Have fun with it and try to tie up some loose ends at the end (or don't and bring them back for another adventure).