The Director Welcomes You

The Obedient Friends Chase

#379f11

Location

Dull, Windy Israel

Time of Day

23:29

Extraction Point

16 Miles NNE

Time to Complete

18 Hours

Informants,
We need your help. Agent Cooper Rhodes has gone missing and we believe "All Elephant" is responsible. They were last seen in Israel at 15:11. The agent sent one final message – "Clouds develop quickly at the Eye of Heaven". Take this Invisible Bottle - it was their favorite tool and might help you.

— The CD player you were holding self destructs.

The Villain Dossier

Name

Henry Walters

Alias

"All Elephant"

Features

5' 10"

Gray eyes

Faint curved scar / Right eye

Organization

The Gang of Luminous Fireman

Emotions

Sorrow

Personality

Elegantly Stocky

Motive

Take over a government to lust for power

Bodyguard

Juan the "Depressed Leprechaun"

Physical Size

Colossal

Story

Additional Locations

The Obedient Park

Compact Island

Downfall Lodge

Random Events

Nearby Gas Tank Strikes the church bell

Crazy Man grabs a lady's purse

Gallon of Trash Adopts a nearby child

Toilet Bursts loudly

World

Stores

Xavier's Stool Cosmetics

Benson's crutch Labs

Thornton's Kitchen knife Specialities

Rhodes's Hanging Birdcage Beauty Stop

Traps

Large Net

Flame Strike of Animosity

Objects

Stool that has been hollowed out

Kitchen knife children's replica

Secret crutch

Hidden Credit Card

Stave of Animosity

Wand of Wonder

Caster henceforth gains an additional hit point at each level

People

Name Codename Career Likes Dislikes
Ryan Benson "Drowsy Pretzels" Merchant Rabbits Mirrors
Abel Thornton "Plump Stomachs" Mole Glitter Harmonica
Brantley Hill Chef Death Lipstick
Xavier Owen Exhausted Dinosaurs Potatoes
Cooper Rhodes Cranky Dinosaurs Technology

Cipher



                

                
 
                

                

                

                

                

                

The Fuck Is This?

After years of playing Dungeons & Dragons, I decided to make a variation where everything is improv. The DM knows as much as the players and you tell a story together - sitcom style. We use this site as a quest starter, think of some characters, and see how much we can make each other laugh.

It's designed to be simple, portable, and dependent on being creative & inventive. I wanted a framework to guide the plot forward but let us find the story. This page is just a guide to help the stories become too redundant - take as much as you want, ignore as much as you need. If you want to follow along with our adventures or read some examples, check out my personal story notes.

This concept and site was crafted by Andrew Maruska with linguistic help from Evan Stark

But how?

The Most Important Rule

Be Silly. The goal is to laugh not to have a normal adventure. Someone wants to go to the moon? Fuck yeah they do and we're going to do it with medieval technology.

Set Up

Give the players a home base, a year they want to play in, and some general ownership of the setup. It's more successful when everyone has helped create the world because when a player makes suggestions it's easier to integrate them without feeling too precious. It helps to have a figurehead that assigns the quest to authoritatively start.

Characters

90% of creating a character here is a funny voice you're forced to talk in for 3 hours. I typically have people pick one trait they want to be good at and give them a slight advantage when using that - and the same for a negative trait. Don't overcomplicate it. They wanna be a skateboarder who can't feel love? perfect. +2 to cool & -2 to social acceptance.

Rolling

This can be whatever you want but as a general rule I use d20's as a graded scale. Sometimes, I craft the roll to mimic the action i.e. if they are walking a tight rope then might need to roll a 10 because 20 & 1 make them fall to one side or the other. Rolling in D&D got boring so make it fun again.

Dungeon Master

Your goal is to say 'Yes and...' but realistically it's 'Yes and roll to see if you can actually do that triple backflip down the cliff to mount the attacking phoenix...' - It's okay to make them fail, just don't tell them no. This guide is to help you be 1 step ahead of the players but it can't know the vibe of the room, have some empathy and play to the crowd.

Ending

No one can tell you this. The guide is to help you get 1/3 of the adventure set up and the rest will be created by the adventuring party. Have fun with it and try to tie up some loose ends at the end (or don't and bring them back for another adventure).