The Director Welcomes You

Who is Nicky Sasquatch?

#5c32cc

Location

Rainy, Overcast The Gambia

Time of Day

5:21

Extraction Point

162 Miles W

Time to Complete

43 Hours

Eyeballs,
We need your help. Agent Brooklyn Larson has gone missing and we believe "Violet Horse" is responsible. They were last seen in The Gambia at 01:08. The agent sent one final message – "Tracks of wolves can be seen at the Music Store". Take this Clean Bread - it was their favorite tool and might help you.

— The iPod you were holding self destructs.

The Villain Dossier

Name

Asher Lucas

Alias

"Violet Horse"

Features

4' 5"

Amber eyes

Large moles / Left arm

Organization

The Gang of Serpentine Leg

Emotions

Exasperated

Personality

Ferociously Whispering

Motive

Disrupt the military to become the best

Bodyguard

Nicky the "Glamorous Python"

Physical Size

Microscopic

Story

Additional Locations

The Dirty Forge

Underground Lagoon

Grave Consequences Shelter

Random Events

Nomad Calls menacingly

Nomad Becomes wounded

Cat Bounces oddly

Bag of Flour Is accused by the law

World

Stores

Ivy's Pair of Statues Bureau

Burton's Candlesticks Bazaar

Griffin's Lamp Supermarket

Larson's Easel Warehouse

Traps

Swinging Block

Flooded Corridor of Cleanliness

Objects

Pair of Statues that is glowing

Lamp children's replica

Secret Candlesticks

Hidden Chastity Belt

Hatchet of Cleanliness

Wand of Wonder

Target degenerates into an abomination hated by sentient beings

People

Name Codename Career Likes Dislikes
Finley Burton "Gross Kidneys" Merchant Batteries Socks
Silas Griffin "Plump Livers" Mole Cookies Limes
Joel McCormick Counselor Lions Sticks
Ivy Patton Weakened Peanut Butter Cellphones
Brooklyn Larson Bruised Contracts Limes

Cipher



                

                
 
                

                

                

                

                

                

The Fuck Is This?

After years of playing Dungeons & Dragons, I decided to make a variation where everything is improv. The DM knows as much as the players and you tell a story together - sitcom style. We use this site as a quest starter, think of some characters, and see how much we can make each other laugh.

It's designed to be simple, portable, and dependent on being creative & inventive. I wanted a framework to guide the plot forward but let us find the story. This page is just a guide to help the stories become too redundant - take as much as you want, ignore as much as you need. If you want to follow along with our adventures or read some examples, check out my personal story notes.

This concept and site was crafted by Andrew Maruska with linguistic help from Evan Stark

But how?

The Most Important Rule

Be Silly. The goal is to laugh not to have a normal adventure. Someone wants to go to the moon? Fuck yeah they do and we're going to do it with medieval technology.

Set Up

Give the players a home base, a year they want to play in, and some general ownership of the setup. It's more successful when everyone has helped create the world because when a player makes suggestions it's easier to integrate them without feeling too precious. It helps to have a figurehead that assigns the quest to authoritatively start.

Characters

90% of creating a character here is a funny voice you're forced to talk in for 3 hours. I typically have people pick one trait they want to be good at and give them a slight advantage when using that - and the same for a negative trait. Don't overcomplicate it. They wanna be a skateboarder who can't feel love? perfect. +2 to cool & -2 to social acceptance.

Rolling

This can be whatever you want but as a general rule I use d20's as a graded scale. Sometimes, I craft the roll to mimic the action i.e. if they are walking a tight rope then might need to roll a 10 because 20 & 1 make them fall to one side or the other. Rolling in D&D got boring so make it fun again.

Dungeon Master

Your goal is to say 'Yes and...' but realistically it's 'Yes and roll to see if you can actually do that triple backflip down the cliff to mount the attacking phoenix...' - It's okay to make them fail, just don't tell them no. This guide is to help you be 1 step ahead of the players but it can't know the vibe of the room, have some empathy and play to the crowd.

Ending

No one can tell you this. The guide is to help you get 1/3 of the adventure set up and the rest will be created by the adventuring party. Have fun with it and try to tie up some loose ends at the end (or don't and bring them back for another adventure).