The Director Welcomes You

Du jour Royale

#724128

Location

Dark, Gorgeous Pakistan

Time of Day

20:31

Extraction Point

80 Miles SW

Time to Complete

22 Hours

Ambassadors,
As you can see you are trapped inside be locked inside of a Crowded Forge . We almost couldn't find you — Please explain when you get back. All we know is "Heavy Gnome" is responsible and they sent us this message - "A shrine is nearby at the Crossroads". Your mission was clandestine, achieve what you can.

Hopefully you still have that Sharp Bottle hidden on you.

— The Portable Radio you were holding self destructs.

The Villain Dossier

Name

Ella Boyd

Alias

"Heavy Gnome"

Features

4' 4"

Green eyes

Large deep scar / Left arm

Organization

The Sorority of Dowdy Tramp

Emotions

Alienated

Personality

Unbearably Didactic

Motive

Take over a government out of desperation

Bodyguard

Joseph the "Affluent Dolphin"

Physical Size

Huge

Story

Additional Locations

The Poor Isle

Polluted Grove

Secrecy City

Random Events

Turtle Crashes slowly

Crow stop the party and asks questions

Feminist emerges

Herd of Chicken stop the party and asks questions

World

Stores

Grayson's Bottle Du jour

Graham's Rubber Plant Factory

Dunn's Music Box Couture

Powers's Credenza Outlet

Traps

Flame Strike

Javelin of Disaster

Objects

Bottle made of heavy metal

Music Box with a False bottom

Secret Rubber Plant

Hidden Notebook

Medallion of Disaster

Wand of Wonder

Caster’s hands appear to be crude wooden replicas

People

Name Codename Career Likes Dislikes
Maya Graham "Fast Noses" Merchant Flowers Candles
Kaylee Dunn "One Pretzels" Mole Hammers Potatoes
Piper McKinney Counselor Cats Deodorant
Grayson Price Accountant Essential Oils Photography
Charles Powers Blacksmith Water Boxes

Cipher



                

                
 
                

                

                

                

                

                

The Fuck Is This?

After years of playing Dungeons & Dragons, I decided to make a variation where everything is improv. The DM knows as much as the players and you tell a story together - sitcom style. We use this site as a quest starter, think of some characters, and see how much we can make each other laugh.

It's designed to be simple, portable, and dependent on being creative & inventive. I wanted a framework to guide the plot forward but let us find the story. This page is just a guide to help the stories become too redundant - take as much as you want, ignore as much as you need. If you want to follow along with our adventures or read some examples, check out my personal story notes.

This concept and site was crafted by Andrew Maruska with linguistic help from Evan Stark

But how?

The Most Important Rule

Be Silly. The goal is to laugh not to have a normal adventure. Someone wants to go to the moon? Fuck yeah they do and we're going to do it with medieval technology.

Set Up

Give the players a home base, a year they want to play in, and some general ownership of the setup. It's more successful when everyone has helped create the world because when a player makes suggestions it's easier to integrate them without feeling too precious. It helps to have a figurehead that assigns the quest to authoritatively start.

Characters

90% of creating a character here is a funny voice you're forced to talk in for 3 hours. I typically have people pick one trait they want to be good at and give them a slight advantage when using that - and the same for a negative trait. Don't overcomplicate it. They wanna be a skateboarder who can't feel love? perfect. +2 to cool & -2 to social acceptance.

Rolling

This can be whatever you want but as a general rule I use d20's as a graded scale. Sometimes, I craft the roll to mimic the action i.e. if they are walking a tight rope then might need to roll a 10 because 20 & 1 make them fall to one side or the other. Rolling in D&D got boring so make it fun again.

Dungeon Master

Your goal is to say 'Yes and...' but realistically it's 'Yes and roll to see if you can actually do that triple backflip down the cliff to mount the attacking phoenix...' - It's okay to make them fail, just don't tell them no. This guide is to help you be 1 step ahead of the players but it can't know the vibe of the room, have some empathy and play to the crowd.

Ending

No one can tell you this. The guide is to help you get 1/3 of the adventure set up and the rest will be created by the adventuring party. Have fun with it and try to tie up some loose ends at the end (or don't and bring them back for another adventure).