The Director Welcomes You

Operation — Skinny Library

#20758d

Location

Gloomy, Chilly Maldives

Time of Day

2:59

Extraction Point

86 Miles SWW

Time to Complete

19 Hours

Agents,
I have sent you to climb a Rundown Isle to look for a suspect by the name "Wild Leech". This mission is anti-surveillance. Their recent activity is concerning and we need you to stop the outbreak. We don't know much about their goals but we've intercepted this cryptic message – "A black cat runs past at the Crossroads".

We're low budget this mission – I've packed a Glowing Bottle in your kit to help.

— The Portable Radio you were holding self destructs.

The Villain Dossier

Name

Sarah Henry

Alias

"Wild Leech"

Features

7' 9"

Blue eyes

Faint curved scar / Crotch

Organization

The Task Force of Jealous Spa

Emotions

Lonely

Personality

Energetically Smelly

Motive

Disrupt the military for sibling rivalry

Bodyguard

Charles the "Tender Chimera"

Physical Size

Insignificant

Story

Additional Locations

The Skinny Chateau

Overpopulated Masquerade

Animosity Shelter

Random Events

Reindeer Is under a curse

Buccaneer Lunges at the group

Potato Is frozen into a block of ice

Beggar skins a cat with his teeth

World

Stores

Scarlett's Spare brick Boutique

Chang's crutch Discount

Garrett's Credenza Worldwide

White's Flower in Vase Logistics

Traps

Moving Executioner Statue

Ray of Sickness of Instability

Objects

Spare brick with a False bottom

Credenza that is glowing

Secret crutch

Hidden Throwing Dart

Targe of Instability

Wand of Wonder

If target is beheaded, a spectacular lightshow ensues

People

Name Codename Career Likes Dislikes
Elena Chang "Meaty Churros" Merchant Rubber Bands Technology
Anastasia Garrett "The Bagels" Mole Flowers Hamsters
Michelle Gilbert Pharmacist Trees Bread
Scarlett Hansen Indifferent Baseball Chili
Jocelyn White Talent agent Water Sharks

Cipher



                

                
 
                

                

                

                

                

                

The Fuck Is This?

After years of playing Dungeons & Dragons, I decided to make a variation where everything is improv. The DM knows as much as the players and you tell a story together - sitcom style. We use this site as a quest starter, think of some characters, and see how much we can make each other laugh.

It's designed to be simple, portable, and dependent on being creative & inventive. I wanted a framework to guide the plot forward but let us find the story. This page is just a guide to help the stories become too redundant - take as much as you want, ignore as much as you need. If you want to follow along with our adventures or read some examples, check out my personal story notes.

This concept and site was crafted by Andrew Maruska with linguistic help from Evan Stark

But how?

The Most Important Rule

Be Silly. The goal is to laugh not to have a normal adventure. Someone wants to go to the moon? Fuck yeah they do and we're going to do it with medieval technology.

Set Up

Give the players a home base, a year they want to play in, and some general ownership of the setup. It's more successful when everyone has helped create the world because when a player makes suggestions it's easier to integrate them without feeling too precious. It helps to have a figurehead that assigns the quest to authoritatively start.

Characters

90% of creating a character here is a funny voice you're forced to talk in for 3 hours. I typically have people pick one trait they want to be good at and give them a slight advantage when using that - and the same for a negative trait. Don't overcomplicate it. They wanna be a skateboarder who can't feel love? perfect. +2 to cool & -2 to social acceptance.

Rolling

This can be whatever you want but as a general rule I use d20's as a graded scale. Sometimes, I craft the roll to mimic the action i.e. if they are walking a tight rope then might need to roll a 10 because 20 & 1 make them fall to one side or the other. Rolling in D&D got boring so make it fun again.

Dungeon Master

Your goal is to say 'Yes and...' but realistically it's 'Yes and roll to see if you can actually do that triple backflip down the cliff to mount the attacking phoenix...' - It's okay to make them fail, just don't tell them no. This guide is to help you be 1 step ahead of the players but it can't know the vibe of the room, have some empathy and play to the crowd.

Ending

No one can tell you this. The guide is to help you get 1/3 of the adventure set up and the rest will be created by the adventuring party. Have fun with it and try to tie up some loose ends at the end (or don't and bring them back for another adventure).