The Director Welcomes You

The Stealthily Quick Agent

#8b23bc

Location

Windless, Gorgeous Belarus

Time of Day

7:33

Extraction Point

171 Miles NEE

Time to Complete

5 Hours

Meddlers,
As you can see you are trapped inside fly above a Crowded Motel . We almost couldn't find you — Please explain when you get back. All we know is "Five Hydra" is responsible and they sent us this message - "The group finds a dead fish at the Beast's Maze". Your mission was clandestine, achieve what you can.

Hopefully you still have that Angry Bread hidden on you.

— The CD player you were holding self destructs.

The Villain Dossier

Name

Easton Logan

Alias

"Five Hydra"

Features

5' 1"

Red eyes

Faint curved scar / Crotch

Organization

The Society of Red Hand

Emotions

Spiteful

Personality

Stealthily Fried

Motive

Disrupt the military out of survival

Bodyguard

James the "Putrid Rabbit"

Physical Size

Tremendous

Story

Additional Locations

The Quick Acropolis

Underwater Chateau

Darkness Chateau

Random Events

Bum is heard screaming

Procession Is getting confiscated

Gallon of Trash Is throwing a protest

Wedding Cake gathers near a point of interest

World

Stores

Trinity's Spare brick Properties

Sutton's Doorway Bazaar

Stanley's Medallion Labs

Hunt's Picture Frame Chic Chåteau

Traps

Poisoned Arrow

Large Net of Obsession

Objects

Spare brick with a False bottom

Medallion that has been hollowed out

Secret Doorway

Hidden Arrows

Blindfold of Obsession

Wand of Wonder

Someone nearby rings like a bell whenever he sees magic used

People

Name Codename Career Likes Dislikes
Rhett Sutton "Two Fingers" Merchant Tea Technology
Timothy Stanley "Small Hearts" Mole Lamps Dolphins
Declan Robbins Journalist Essential Oils Chocolate
Trinity Rodgers Graphic Designer Jazz Flashlights
Eliana Hunt Demon Photography Drinking

Cipher



                

                
 
                

                

                

                

                

                

The Fuck Is This?

After years of playing Dungeons & Dragons, I decided to make a variation where everything is improv. The DM knows as much as the players and you tell a story together - sitcom style. We use this site as a quest starter, think of some characters, and see how much we can make each other laugh.

It's designed to be simple, portable, and dependent on being creative & inventive. I wanted a framework to guide the plot forward but let us find the story. This page is just a guide to help the stories become too redundant - take as much as you want, ignore as much as you need. If you want to follow along with our adventures or read some examples, check out my personal story notes.

This concept and site was crafted by Andrew Maruska with linguistic help from Evan Stark

But how?

The Most Important Rule

Be Silly. The goal is to laugh not to have a normal adventure. Someone wants to go to the moon? Fuck yeah they do and we're going to do it with medieval technology.

Set Up

Give the players a home base, a year they want to play in, and some general ownership of the setup. It's more successful when everyone has helped create the world because when a player makes suggestions it's easier to integrate them without feeling too precious. It helps to have a figurehead that assigns the quest to authoritatively start.

Characters

90% of creating a character here is a funny voice you're forced to talk in for 3 hours. I typically have people pick one trait they want to be good at and give them a slight advantage when using that - and the same for a negative trait. Don't overcomplicate it. They wanna be a skateboarder who can't feel love? perfect. +2 to cool & -2 to social acceptance.

Rolling

This can be whatever you want but as a general rule I use d20's as a graded scale. Sometimes, I craft the roll to mimic the action i.e. if they are walking a tight rope then might need to roll a 10 because 20 & 1 make them fall to one side or the other. Rolling in D&D got boring so make it fun again.

Dungeon Master

Your goal is to say 'Yes and...' but realistically it's 'Yes and roll to see if you can actually do that triple backflip down the cliff to mount the attacking phoenix...' - It's okay to make them fail, just don't tell them no. This guide is to help you be 1 step ahead of the players but it can't know the vibe of the room, have some empathy and play to the crowd.

Ending

No one can tell you this. The guide is to help you get 1/3 of the adventure set up and the rest will be created by the adventuring party. Have fun with it and try to tie up some loose ends at the end (or don't and bring them back for another adventure).