The Director Welcomes You

Who is Philip Existence?

#b8dcbe

Location

Gorgeous, Breezy Saint Lucia

Time of Day

18:20

Extraction Point

95 Miles SW

Time to Complete

15 Hours

Agents,
As you can see you are trapped inside the inside of a Overpopulated Crypt . We almost couldn't find you — Please explain when you get back. All we know is "Chunky Wendigo" is responsible and they sent us this message - "A shrine is nearby at the giants footsteps". Your mission was clandestine, achieve what you can.

Hopefully you still have that Glowing Paint Brush hidden on you.

— The iPod you were holding self destructs.

The Villain Dossier

Name

Ryleigh Wilson

Alias

"Chunky Wendigo"

Features

4' 11"

Amber eyes

Large moles / Neck

Organization

The Club of Many Variety

Emotions

Hostile

Personality

Longingly Bald

Motive

Take over a government to control the Children

Bodyguard

Philip the "Magnificent child"

Physical Size

Short

Story

Additional Locations

The Vast House

Expensive Castle

Prosperity City

Random Events

Vagabond arrives in the mail

Chanting Cult Balances on a ledge

Reindeer arrives in the mail

Store Adopts a nearby child

World

Stores

Abigail's Creeping Vines Unlimited

Simmons's Toolbox Supermarket

White's Pedestal Technologies

Aguilar's Picture Frame Group

Traps

Flooded Corridor

Bricks from Ceiling of Demise

Objects

Creeping Vines children's replica

Pedestal that is glowing

Secret Toolbox

Hidden Polearm

Fork of Demise

Wand of Wonder

Next person to whom caster speaks forgets who the caster is

People

Name Codename Career Likes Dislikes
Kylie Simmons "Wild Bones" Merchant Batteries Soup
Taylor White "Plump Parmigianas" Mole Hammers Sticks
Taylor Stewart Exhilarated Trees Drinking
Abigail Dean Plumber Squirrels Ice Cubes
Lorenzo Aguilar Dog surfing instructor Plushies Batteries

Cipher



                

                
 
                

                

                

                

                

                

The Fuck Is This?

After years of playing Dungeons & Dragons, I decided to make a variation where everything is improv. The DM knows as much as the players and you tell a story together - sitcom style. We use this site as a quest starter, think of some characters, and see how much we can make each other laugh.

It's designed to be simple, portable, and dependent on being creative & inventive. I wanted a framework to guide the plot forward but let us find the story. This page is just a guide to help the stories become too redundant - take as much as you want, ignore as much as you need. If you want to follow along with our adventures or read some examples, check out my personal story notes.

This concept and site was crafted by Andrew Maruska with linguistic help from Evan Stark

But how?

The Most Important Rule

Be Silly. The goal is to laugh not to have a normal adventure. Someone wants to go to the moon? Fuck yeah they do and we're going to do it with medieval technology.

Set Up

Give the players a home base, a year they want to play in, and some general ownership of the setup. It's more successful when everyone has helped create the world because when a player makes suggestions it's easier to integrate them without feeling too precious. It helps to have a figurehead that assigns the quest to authoritatively start.

Characters

90% of creating a character here is a funny voice you're forced to talk in for 3 hours. I typically have people pick one trait they want to be good at and give them a slight advantage when using that - and the same for a negative trait. Don't overcomplicate it. They wanna be a skateboarder who can't feel love? perfect. +2 to cool & -2 to social acceptance.

Rolling

This can be whatever you want but as a general rule I use d20's as a graded scale. Sometimes, I craft the roll to mimic the action i.e. if they are walking a tight rope then might need to roll a 10 because 20 & 1 make them fall to one side or the other. Rolling in D&D got boring so make it fun again.

Dungeon Master

Your goal is to say 'Yes and...' but realistically it's 'Yes and roll to see if you can actually do that triple backflip down the cliff to mount the attacking phoenix...' - It's okay to make them fail, just don't tell them no. This guide is to help you be 1 step ahead of the players but it can't know the vibe of the room, have some empathy and play to the crowd.

Ending

No one can tell you this. The guide is to help you get 1/3 of the adventure set up and the rest will be created by the adventuring party. Have fun with it and try to tie up some loose ends at the end (or don't and bring them back for another adventure).