The Director Welcomes You

The Efficacious Gold Occurrence

#3ff7c9

Location

Gorgeous, Mild Botswana

Time of Day

3:5

Extraction Point

42 Miles NE

Time to Complete

33 Hours

Undercover Emissaries,
I have sent you to the inside of a Compact Motel to look for a suspect by the name "Silver Sloth". This mission is black bag. Their recent activity is concerning and we need you to rescue our field agent. We don't know much about their goals but we've intercepted this cryptic message – "A vagrant asks for food at the Rainbow Mountain".

We're low budget this mission – I've packed a Fluffy Lamp in your kit to help.

— The Vinyl record player you were holding self destructs.

The Villain Dossier

Name

Brooke Bennett

Alias

"Silver Sloth"

Features

6' 4"

Amber eyes

Stretch Marks / Left foot

Organization

The Commission of Important Rollercoaster

Emotions

Rejected

Personality

Usefully Wrapped

Motive

Make a lot of money for a love interest

Bodyguard

James the "Raw potato"

Physical Size

Massive

Story

Additional Locations

The Efficacious Carousal

Underwater Business

Competency Forge

Random Events

Gypsy Integrates silently into the group

Bottle of Soy Sauce Catches leprosy

Thief Is accused by the law

Water Vessel Ignites violently

World

Stores

Katherine's Bureau Worldwide

Garner's Goblet Ventures

Potter's Iron stove Closet

Nunez's Sink Chic Chåteau

Traps

Bricks from Ceiling

Javelin of Bliss

Objects

Bureau that has been hollowed out

Iron stove that has been hollowed out

Secret Goblet

Hidden File

Targe of Bliss

Wand of Wonder

Once per day, caster can make his clothes vanish for 1d10 rounds

People

Name Codename Career Likes Dislikes
Elena Garner "Black Cheesecakes" Merchant Oranges Paper
Violet Potter "Slow Fingers" Mole Chili Oranges
Jeremiah Brown Bruised Money Pillows
Katherine Miranda Railroad Conductor Horses Cookies
Weston Nunez Dietitian Coffee Notes

Cipher



                

                
 
                

                

                

                

                

                

The Fuck Is This?

After years of playing Dungeons & Dragons, I decided to make a variation where everything is improv. The DM knows as much as the players and you tell a story together - sitcom style. We use this site as a quest starter, think of some characters, and see how much we can make each other laugh.

It's designed to be simple, portable, and dependent on being creative & inventive. I wanted a framework to guide the plot forward but let us find the story. This page is just a guide to help the stories become too redundant - take as much as you want, ignore as much as you need. If you want to follow along with our adventures or read some examples, check out my personal story notes.

This concept and site was crafted by Andrew Maruska with linguistic help from Evan Stark

But how?

The Most Important Rule

Be Silly. The goal is to laugh not to have a normal adventure. Someone wants to go to the moon? Fuck yeah they do and we're going to do it with medieval technology.

Set Up

Give the players a home base, a year they want to play in, and some general ownership of the setup. It's more successful when everyone has helped create the world because when a player makes suggestions it's easier to integrate them without feeling too precious. It helps to have a figurehead that assigns the quest to authoritatively start.

Characters

90% of creating a character here is a funny voice you're forced to talk in for 3 hours. I typically have people pick one trait they want to be good at and give them a slight advantage when using that - and the same for a negative trait. Don't overcomplicate it. They wanna be a skateboarder who can't feel love? perfect. +2 to cool & -2 to social acceptance.

Rolling

This can be whatever you want but as a general rule I use d20's as a graded scale. Sometimes, I craft the roll to mimic the action i.e. if they are walking a tight rope then might need to roll a 10 because 20 & 1 make them fall to one side or the other. Rolling in D&D got boring so make it fun again.

Dungeon Master

Your goal is to say 'Yes and...' but realistically it's 'Yes and roll to see if you can actually do that triple backflip down the cliff to mount the attacking phoenix...' - It's okay to make them fail, just don't tell them no. This guide is to help you be 1 step ahead of the players but it can't know the vibe of the room, have some empathy and play to the crowd.

Ending

No one can tell you this. The guide is to help you get 1/3 of the adventure set up and the rest will be created by the adventuring party. Have fun with it and try to tie up some loose ends at the end (or don't and bring them back for another adventure).