The Director Welcomes You

The Cleaver Exuberance Protocol

#2188ec

Location

Gloomy, Hot France

Time of Day

4:59

Extraction Point

5 Miles SE

Time to Complete

30 Hours

Eyeballs,
As you can see you are trapped inside descend into Pitch Black Missile Launch Site . We almost couldn't find you — Please explain when you get back. All we know is "The Python" is responsible and they sent us this message - "Clouds develop quickly at the Grey Hollow". Your mission was black ops, achieve what you can.

Hopefully you still have that Glowing Watch hidden on you.

— The Vinyl record player you were holding self destructs.

The Villain Dossier

Name

Grant Chandler

Alias

"The Python"

Features

6' 8"

Hazel eyes

Faint curved scar / Crotch

Organization

The Incorporated of Yummy Class

Emotions

Insecure

Personality

Queasily Faint

Motive

Make a lot of money to be left alone

Bodyguard

Jessica the "Worn Bigfoot"

Physical Size

Soaring

Story

Additional Locations

The Bumpy Acropolis

Touristy Fortress

Fragility Maze

Random Events

Chanting Cult Is being tortured

Beggar Is getting confiscated

Woman is being loudly arrested

Jug of Peanut Butter Glistens gently

World

Stores

Ava's Flower in Vase Ventures

Neal's Glass Jars Properties

Diaz's Footlocker Beauty Stop

Sandoval's Bell Unlimited

Traps

Rolling Rock

Poison Dart of Exuberance

Objects

Flower in Vase that has been hollowed out

Footlocker that is glowing

Secret Glass Jars

Hidden Necklace

Lipstick of Exuberance

Wand of Wonder

An intricate maze of panels of ice sprouts in a 100 yard radius

People

Name Codename Career Likes Dislikes
Jocelyn Neal "Golden Heels" Merchant Cookies Robots
Sarah Diaz "Red Legs" Mole Cousins Chocolate
Sofia Butler Exhilarated Octopus Christmas
Ava Delgado Bruised Houses Horses
Norah Sandoval Hairdresser Rubber Stamps Cellphones

Cipher



                

                
 
                

                

                

                

                

                

The Fuck Is This?

After years of playing Dungeons & Dragons, I decided to make a variation where everything is improv. The DM knows as much as the players and you tell a story together - sitcom style. We use this site as a quest starter, think of some characters, and see how much we can make each other laugh.

It's designed to be simple, portable, and dependent on being creative & inventive. I wanted a framework to guide the plot forward but let us find the story. This page is just a guide to help the stories become too redundant - take as much as you want, ignore as much as you need. If you want to follow along with our adventures or read some examples, check out my personal story notes.

This concept and site was crafted by Andrew Maruska with linguistic help from Evan Stark

But how?

The Most Important Rule

Be Silly. The goal is to laugh not to have a normal adventure. Someone wants to go to the moon? Fuck yeah they do and we're going to do it with medieval technology.

Set Up

Give the players a home base, a year they want to play in, and some general ownership of the setup. It's more successful when everyone has helped create the world because when a player makes suggestions it's easier to integrate them without feeling too precious. It helps to have a figurehead that assigns the quest to authoritatively start.

Characters

90% of creating a character here is a funny voice you're forced to talk in for 3 hours. I typically have people pick one trait they want to be good at and give them a slight advantage when using that - and the same for a negative trait. Don't overcomplicate it. They wanna be a skateboarder who can't feel love? perfect. +2 to cool & -2 to social acceptance.

Rolling

This can be whatever you want but as a general rule I use d20's as a graded scale. Sometimes, I craft the roll to mimic the action i.e. if they are walking a tight rope then might need to roll a 10 because 20 & 1 make them fall to one side or the other. Rolling in D&D got boring so make it fun again.

Dungeon Master

Your goal is to say 'Yes and...' but realistically it's 'Yes and roll to see if you can actually do that triple backflip down the cliff to mount the attacking phoenix...' - It's okay to make them fail, just don't tell them no. This guide is to help you be 1 step ahead of the players but it can't know the vibe of the room, have some empathy and play to the crowd.

Ending

No one can tell you this. The guide is to help you get 1/3 of the adventure set up and the rest will be created by the adventuring party. Have fun with it and try to tie up some loose ends at the end (or don't and bring them back for another adventure).