The Director Welcomes You

Who is Jimmy Monument?

#4b5d7e

Location

Foggy, Gorgeous Saint Vincent and the Grenadines

Time of Day

19:10

Extraction Point

5 Miles NW

Time to Complete

24 Hours

Spy Deputies,
We need your help. Agent Ximena Cohen has gone missing and we believe "Golden starfish" is responsible. They were last seen in Saint Vincent and the Grenadines at 14:17. The agent sent one final message – "An out of place door appears at the dry riverbed". Take this Invisible Bicycle - it was their favorite tool and might help you.

— The iPod you were holding self destructs.

The Villain Dossier

Name

Hazel Howard

Alias

"Golden starfish"

Features

4' 9"

Heterochromia eyes

A second belly button / Left hand

Organization

The Order of Dead Art

Emotions

Uncertain

Personality

Vaguely Tall

Motive

Take over a country to cause catastrophe

Bodyguard

Jimmy the "Massive Bat"

Physical Size

Petite

Story

Additional Locations

The Broad Peninsula

Archaic Circus

Pleasure Park

Random Events

Tramp Evades the law

Vagabond Finds gold in the water

Water Vessel is heard screaming

Panhandler Calls menacingly

World

Stores

Madeline's Chaise Logistics

Anderson's Potted Plant Industries

Edwards's Letter Opener Department store

Cohen's Mural Closet

Traps

Fire

Falling Block of Delirium

Objects

Chaise made of heavy metal

Letter Opener that has been hollowed out

Secret Potted Plant

Hidden Shield

Blowgun of Delirium

Wand of Wonder

Caster thinks that he’s actually 10X older than he appears to be

People

Name Codename Career Likes Dislikes
Karter Anderson "Fast Fingers" Merchant Children's Stories Cousins
Abel Edwards "No Bagels" Mole Christmas Broccoli
Roman Tucker Midwife Flashlights Scarves
Madeline Molina Zestful Basketball Butterflies
Ximena Cohen Bounty hunter Jazz Water

Cipher



                

                
 
                

                

                

                

                

                

The Fuck Is This?

After years of playing Dungeons & Dragons, I decided to make a variation where everything is improv. The DM knows as much as the players and you tell a story together - sitcom style. We use this site as a quest starter, think of some characters, and see how much we can make each other laugh.

It's designed to be simple, portable, and dependent on being creative & inventive. I wanted a framework to guide the plot forward but let us find the story. This page is just a guide to help the stories become too redundant - take as much as you want, ignore as much as you need. If you want to follow along with our adventures or read some examples, check out my personal story notes.

This concept and site was crafted by Andrew Maruska with linguistic help from Evan Stark

But how?

The Most Important Rule

Be Silly. The goal is to laugh not to have a normal adventure. Someone wants to go to the moon? Fuck yeah they do and we're going to do it with medieval technology.

Set Up

Give the players a home base, a year they want to play in, and some general ownership of the setup. It's more successful when everyone has helped create the world because when a player makes suggestions it's easier to integrate them without feeling too precious. It helps to have a figurehead that assigns the quest to authoritatively start.

Characters

90% of creating a character here is a funny voice you're forced to talk in for 3 hours. I typically have people pick one trait they want to be good at and give them a slight advantage when using that - and the same for a negative trait. Don't overcomplicate it. They wanna be a skateboarder who can't feel love? perfect. +2 to cool & -2 to social acceptance.

Rolling

This can be whatever you want but as a general rule I use d20's as a graded scale. Sometimes, I craft the roll to mimic the action i.e. if they are walking a tight rope then might need to roll a 10 because 20 & 1 make them fall to one side or the other. Rolling in D&D got boring so make it fun again.

Dungeon Master

Your goal is to say 'Yes and...' but realistically it's 'Yes and roll to see if you can actually do that triple backflip down the cliff to mount the attacking phoenix...' - It's okay to make them fail, just don't tell them no. This guide is to help you be 1 step ahead of the players but it can't know the vibe of the room, have some empathy and play to the crowd.

Ending

No one can tell you this. The guide is to help you get 1/3 of the adventure set up and the rest will be created by the adventuring party. Have fun with it and try to tie up some loose ends at the end (or don't and bring them back for another adventure).