The Director Welcomes You

Flavor, Safety, Bog, Spy.

#03de85

Location

Gorgeous, Foul The Bahamas

Time of Day

7:20

Extraction Point

166 Miles NEE

Time to Complete

45 Hours

Eyeballs,
We need your help. Agent Liliana Murphy has gone missing and we believe "One Sloth" is responsible. They were last seen in The Bahamas at 16:13. The agent sent one final message – "The group finds a sword in a stone at the Crossroads". Take this Fluffy Sun Lotion - it was their favorite tool and might help you.

— The Vinyl record player you were holding self destructs.

The Villain Dossier

Name

Diego Jensen

Alias

"One Sloth"

Features

6' 4"

Red eyes

Stretch Marks / Right arm

Organization

The Sorority of Enlightened Bog

Emotions

Dismayed

Personality

Energetically Salty

Motive

Disrupt the military for pure destruction

Bodyguard

Billy the "Drab Anteaters"

Physical Size

Colossal

Story

Additional Locations

The Worried Shelter

Compact Castle

Laughter Reef

Random Events

Bellhop grabs a lady's purse

Transport Protests

Goblet meets disaster

Chunk of Beef Becomes wounded

World

Stores

Cameron's Plaster Bust Properties

Watkins's Bicycle Du jour

Peters's Basket Consulting

Murphy's Shoe Horn Collective

Traps

Flame Strike

Arrow of Delight

Objects

Plaster Bust that is glowing

Basket made of heavy metal

Secret Bicycle

Hidden Sickle

Goblet of Delight

Wand of Wonder

Target is invulnerable to normal weapons for 1d6 turns

People

Name Codename Career Likes Dislikes
Gabriella Watkins "Fat Pretzels" Merchant Flowers Limes
Kaylee Peters "Red Waffles" Mole Slippers Lions
Rachel Freeman Cleaner Balloons Whipped Cream
Cameron Leon Firefighter Notes Pillows
Liliana Murphy Psychiatrist Physics Chocolate

Cipher



                

                
 
                

                

                

                

                

                

The Fuck Is This?

After years of playing Dungeons & Dragons, I decided to make a variation where everything is improv. The DM knows as much as the players and you tell a story together - sitcom style. We use this site as a quest starter, think of some characters, and see how much we can make each other laugh.

It's designed to be simple, portable, and dependent on being creative & inventive. I wanted a framework to guide the plot forward but let us find the story. This page is just a guide to help the stories become too redundant - take as much as you want, ignore as much as you need. If you want to follow along with our adventures or read some examples, check out my personal story notes.

This concept and site was crafted by Andrew Maruska with linguistic help from Evan Stark

But how?

The Most Important Rule

Be Silly. The goal is to laugh not to have a normal adventure. Someone wants to go to the moon? Fuck yeah they do and we're going to do it with medieval technology.

Set Up

Give the players a home base, a year they want to play in, and some general ownership of the setup. It's more successful when everyone has helped create the world because when a player makes suggestions it's easier to integrate them without feeling too precious. It helps to have a figurehead that assigns the quest to authoritatively start.

Characters

90% of creating a character here is a funny voice you're forced to talk in for 3 hours. I typically have people pick one trait they want to be good at and give them a slight advantage when using that - and the same for a negative trait. Don't overcomplicate it. They wanna be a skateboarder who can't feel love? perfect. +2 to cool & -2 to social acceptance.

Rolling

This can be whatever you want but as a general rule I use d20's as a graded scale. Sometimes, I craft the roll to mimic the action i.e. if they are walking a tight rope then might need to roll a 10 because 20 & 1 make them fall to one side or the other. Rolling in D&D got boring so make it fun again.

Dungeon Master

Your goal is to say 'Yes and...' but realistically it's 'Yes and roll to see if you can actually do that triple backflip down the cliff to mount the attacking phoenix...' - It's okay to make them fail, just don't tell them no. This guide is to help you be 1 step ahead of the players but it can't know the vibe of the room, have some empathy and play to the crowd.

Ending

No one can tell you this. The guide is to help you get 1/3 of the adventure set up and the rest will be created by the adventuring party. Have fun with it and try to tie up some loose ends at the end (or don't and bring them back for another adventure).