The Director Welcomes You

The Quicker Shy Agent

#f512ae

Location

Windless, Stormy Kuwait

Time of Day

21:16

Extraction Point

91 Miles NNE

Time to Complete

12 Hours

Detectives,
This week should be easy. You are delivering a Counter with a False bottom. Get to Kuwait at 00:00

Good Luck.

— The Microsoft Zune you were holding self destructs.

The Villain Dossier

Name

Juliana Gallagher

Alias

"One Imp"

Features

5' 6"

Red eyes

Stretch Marks / Left hand

Organization

The Crew of Shallow Wax

Emotions

Trust

Personality

Quicker Shaggy

Motive

Make a lot of money to become famous

Bodyguard

Alex the "Ugliest kobold"

Physical Size

Big

Story

Additional Locations

The Shy Castle

Touristy Shelter

Censorship Masquerade

Random Events

Buccaneer meets disaster

Gunshot Adopts a nearby child

Amulet grabs a lady's purse

Goblet scurries by

World

Stores

Amelia's Counter Hole

Ward's Urn Wardrobe

Schmidt's Workbench Worldwide

Evans's Candlesticks Threads

Traps

Swinging Block

Scything Blade of Demise

Objects

Counter with a False bottom

Workbench children's replica

Secret Urn

Hidden Boomerang

Trident of Demise

Wand of Wonder

Target stretches into an upright "X" for 1d10 rounds

People

Name Codename Career Likes Dislikes
Connor Ward "Two Hearts" Merchant Doors Water
Sara Schmidt "White Thumbs" Mole Bells Batteries
Justin Taylor Paramedic Squirrels Bells
Amelia Hicks Banker Chalk Oranges
Lyla Evans Soul Trucks Attention

Cipher



                

                
 
                

                

                

                

                

                

The Fuck Is This?

After years of playing Dungeons & Dragons, I decided to make a variation where everything is improv. The DM knows as much as the players and you tell a story together - sitcom style. We use this site as a quest starter, think of some characters, and see how much we can make each other laugh.

It's designed to be simple, portable, and dependent on being creative & inventive. I wanted a framework to guide the plot forward but let us find the story. This page is just a guide to help the stories become too redundant - take as much as you want, ignore as much as you need. If you want to follow along with our adventures or read some examples, check out my personal story notes.

This concept and site was crafted by Andrew Maruska with linguistic help from Evan Stark

But how?

The Most Important Rule

Be Silly. The goal is to laugh not to have a normal adventure. Someone wants to go to the moon? Fuck yeah they do and we're going to do it with medieval technology.

Set Up

Give the players a home base, a year they want to play in, and some general ownership of the setup. It's more successful when everyone has helped create the world because when a player makes suggestions it's easier to integrate them without feeling too precious. It helps to have a figurehead that assigns the quest to authoritatively start.

Characters

90% of creating a character here is a funny voice you're forced to talk in for 3 hours. I typically have people pick one trait they want to be good at and give them a slight advantage when using that - and the same for a negative trait. Don't overcomplicate it. They wanna be a skateboarder who can't feel love? perfect. +2 to cool & -2 to social acceptance.

Rolling

This can be whatever you want but as a general rule I use d20's as a graded scale. Sometimes, I craft the roll to mimic the action i.e. if they are walking a tight rope then might need to roll a 10 because 20 & 1 make them fall to one side or the other. Rolling in D&D got boring so make it fun again.

Dungeon Master

Your goal is to say 'Yes and...' but realistically it's 'Yes and roll to see if you can actually do that triple backflip down the cliff to mount the attacking phoenix...' - It's okay to make them fail, just don't tell them no. This guide is to help you be 1 step ahead of the players but it can't know the vibe of the room, have some empathy and play to the crowd.

Ending

No one can tell you this. The guide is to help you get 1/3 of the adventure set up and the rest will be created by the adventuring party. Have fun with it and try to tie up some loose ends at the end (or don't and bring them back for another adventure).