The Director Welcomes You

Operation — Serpentine Society

#7ac409

Location

Rainy, Cool Jordan

Time of Day

19:34

Extraction Point

9 Miles N

Time to Complete

31 Hours

Examiners,
As you can see you are trapped inside within a Ancient Villa . We almost couldn't find you — Please explain when you get back. All we know is "Five Pig" is responsible and they sent us this message - "A lone flower growing at the Great Shadow". Your mission was black ops, achieve what you can.

Hopefully you still have that Rusty Paint hidden on you.

— The Tape recorder you were holding self destructs.

The Villain Dossier

Name

Cora Gutierrez

Alias

"Five Pig"

Features

4' 7"

Amber eyes

Large moles / Left middle finger

Organization

The Department of Ancient Ring

Emotions

Rejected

Personality

Dramatically Miniature

Motive

Make a lot of money to lust for power

Bodyguard

Emily the "Slimey Pheonix"

Physical Size

Giant

Story

Additional Locations

The Serpentine Reef

Desolate Manor

The Blackest Black House

Random Events

Bum strikes the ground

Box of Mice is heard screaming

Potato Ignites violently

Gypsy screams at the top of their lungs

World

Stores

Steven's Lamp Du jour

Gardner's Flowers Growing Threads

Hall's Clamp Logistics

Phillips's Bureau International

Traps

Poison Needle

Flooded Corridor of Joy

Objects

Lamp made of heavy metal

Clamp made of heavy metal

Secret Flowers Growing

Hidden Axe

Shoe of Joy

Wand of Wonder

Caster is naturally camouflaged for stealth in a snowy setting

People

Name Codename Career Likes Dislikes
Catherine Gardner "Casual Pastrami's" Merchant Teeth Bracelets
Jack Hall "Little Bagels" Mole Hamsters Snowglobes
Timothy Collins Old Man Batteries Scarves
Steven Hudson Operator Easter Soccer
Ariel Phillips Master Distiller Robots Potatoes

Cipher



                


                

                    
                    

                


                

                    
                    
 
                


                

                    
                    

                


                

                    
                    

                


                

                    
                    

                

                
                

                    
                    

                


                

                    
                    

                

              

            

          

        

      

    



    
      
      
 
        

          

            
The Fuck Is This?

          

          

            
            
After years of playing Dungeons & Dragons, I decided to make a variation where everything is improv. The DM knows as much as the players and you tell a story together - sitcom style. We use this site as a quest starter, think of some characters, and see how much we can make each other laugh.

            
            
It's designed to be simple, portable, and dependent on being creative & inventive. I wanted a framework to guide the plot forward but let us find the story. This page is just a guide to help the stories become too redundant - take as much as you want, ignore as much as you need. If you want to follow along with our adventures or read some examples, check out  my personal story notes.

            
            
This concept and site was crafted by Andrew Maruska with linguistic help from Evan Stark

          

        

      

    


    
      
      
 
        

          

            
But how?

          

          
            
            The Most Important Rule
            
Be Silly. The goal is to laugh not to have a normal adventure. Someone wants to go to the moon? Fuck yeah they do and we're going to do it with medieval technology.

            
            Set Up
            
Give the players a home base, a year they want to play in, and some general ownership of the setup. It's more successful when everyone has helped create the world because when a player makes suggestions it's easier to integrate them without feeling too precious. It helps to have a figurehead that assigns the quest to authoritatively start.

            
            Characters
            
90% of creating a character here is a funny voice you're forced to talk in for 3 hours. I typically have people pick one trait they want to be good at and give them a slight advantage when using that - and the same for a negative trait. Don't overcomplicate it. They wanna be a skateboarder who can't feel love? perfect. +2 to cool & -2 to social acceptance. 

            
            Rolling
            
This can be whatever you want but as a general rule I use d20's as a graded scale. Sometimes, I craft the roll to mimic the action i.e. if they are walking a tight rope then might need to roll a 10 because 20 & 1 make them fall to one side or the other. Rolling in D&D got boring so make it fun again. 

            
            Dungeon Master
            
Your goal is to say 'Yes and...' but realistically it's 'Yes and roll to see if you can actually do that triple backflip down the cliff to mount the attacking phoenix...' - It's okay to make them fail, just don't tell them no. This guide is to help you be 1 step ahead of the players but it can't know the vibe of the room, have some empathy and play to the crowd. 

            
            Ending
            
No one can tell you this. The guide is to help you get 1/3 of the adventure set up and the rest will be created by the adventuring party. Have fun with it and try to tie up some loose ends at the end (or don't and bring them back for another adventure).