The Director Welcomes You

Little shop Royale

#f2111d

Location

Arid, Dull Moldova

Time of Day

7:33

Extraction Point

99 Miles NW

Time to Complete

10 Hours

Undercover Emissaries,
We need your help. Agent Harrison Kennedy has gone missing and we believe "Mini Mongoose" is responsible. They were last seen in Moldova at 24:12. The agent sent one final message – "A shrine is nearby at the dancing-trees". Take this Slippery Bible - it was their favorite tool and might help you.

— The Vinyl record player you were holding self destructs.

The Villain Dossier

Name

Amy Benson

Alias

"Mini Mongoose"

Features

5' 2"

Blue eyes

Large moles / Left eye

Organization

The Alliance of Short Noose

Emotions

Resentful

Personality

Mockingly Itchy

Motive

Take over a government to corrupt everyone

Bodyguard

Juan the "Strong Horse"

Physical Size

Miniature

Story

Additional Locations

The Hungry Pond

Polluted Creek

Laughter Villa

Random Events

Rustler is heard screaming

Druid is heard screaming

Renaissance Faire Strikes the church bell

Hound emerges

World

Stores

Autumn's Pipe Little shop

Austin's Stairwell Logistics

Craig's Wingback chair Labs

Kennedy's Coat Boutique

Traps

Ghoul Touch

Lightning Bolt of Delight

Objects

Pipe made of heavy metal

Wingback chair that is glowing

Secret Stairwell

Hidden Spikes

Blades of Delight

Wand of Wonder

Next weapon to wound target is 10% likely to destroy his soul

People

Name Codename Career Likes Dislikes
Abel Austin "Junior Legs" Merchant Paperclips Chocolate
Zachary Craig "Right Bagels" Mole Gym Memberships Trucks
Esther Oconnor Depressed Doves Lipstick
Autumn Yates Dietitian Books Ice Cubes
Harrison Kennedy Statistician Video Games Writers

Cipher



                

                
 
                

                

                

                

                

                

The Fuck Is This?

After years of playing Dungeons & Dragons, I decided to make a variation where everything is improv. The DM knows as much as the players and you tell a story together - sitcom style. We use this site as a quest starter, think of some characters, and see how much we can make each other laugh.

It's designed to be simple, portable, and dependent on being creative & inventive. I wanted a framework to guide the plot forward but let us find the story. This page is just a guide to help the stories become too redundant - take as much as you want, ignore as much as you need. If you want to follow along with our adventures or read some examples, check out my personal story notes.

This concept and site was crafted by Andrew Maruska with linguistic help from Evan Stark

But how?

The Most Important Rule

Be Silly. The goal is to laugh not to have a normal adventure. Someone wants to go to the moon? Fuck yeah they do and we're going to do it with medieval technology.

Set Up

Give the players a home base, a year they want to play in, and some general ownership of the setup. It's more successful when everyone has helped create the world because when a player makes suggestions it's easier to integrate them without feeling too precious. It helps to have a figurehead that assigns the quest to authoritatively start.

Characters

90% of creating a character here is a funny voice you're forced to talk in for 3 hours. I typically have people pick one trait they want to be good at and give them a slight advantage when using that - and the same for a negative trait. Don't overcomplicate it. They wanna be a skateboarder who can't feel love? perfect. +2 to cool & -2 to social acceptance.

Rolling

This can be whatever you want but as a general rule I use d20's as a graded scale. Sometimes, I craft the roll to mimic the action i.e. if they are walking a tight rope then might need to roll a 10 because 20 & 1 make them fall to one side or the other. Rolling in D&D got boring so make it fun again.

Dungeon Master

Your goal is to say 'Yes and...' but realistically it's 'Yes and roll to see if you can actually do that triple backflip down the cliff to mount the attacking phoenix...' - It's okay to make them fail, just don't tell them no. This guide is to help you be 1 step ahead of the players but it can't know the vibe of the room, have some empathy and play to the crowd.

Ending

No one can tell you this. The guide is to help you get 1/3 of the adventure set up and the rest will be created by the adventuring party. Have fun with it and try to tie up some loose ends at the end (or don't and bring them back for another adventure).