The Director Welcomes You

The Fluffy Doghouse Pursuit

#200af9

Location

Gloomy, Mild Turkey

Time of Day

13:25

Extraction Point

122 Miles SEE

Time to Complete

27 Hours

Detectives,
I have sent you to be locked inside of a Archaic Casino to look for a suspect by the name "Dull Griffin". This mission is anti-surveillance. Their recent activity is concerning and we need you to slow them down. We don't know much about their goals but we've intercepted this cryptic message – "A roll of thunder at the ruined castle".

We're low budget this mission – I've packed a Delicate Tissues in your kit to help.

— The Messenger Pigeon you were holding self destructs.

The Villain Dossier

Name

Brantley Reed

Alias

"Dull Griffin"

Features

6' 3"

Red eyes

Stretch Marks / Right eye

Organization

The Office of Cold Bucket

Emotions

Hesitant

Personality

Overconfidently Annoying

Motive

Disrupt the military for scientific discovery

Bodyguard

Jack the "Mossy Leprechaun"

Physical Size

Puny

Story

Additional Locations

The Fluffy Lodge

Deserted Chateau

Doom Barn Dance

Random Events

Herd of Chicken arrives in the mail

Whore Is hurled at the adventurers

German Trench Club Becomes wounded

Demon overflows

World

Stores

Gianna's Trophy Supermarket

Webster's Brass Replica Closet

Norton's Flowers Growing Warehouse

Hampton's Bonsai Warehouse

Traps

Built-to-Collapse Wall

Bricks from Ceiling of Extinction

Objects

Trophy children's replica

Flowers Growing children's replica

Secret Brass Replica

Hidden Arrows

Bracer of Extinction

Wand of Wonder

Target’s teeth glow brightly while his mouth is open

People

Name Codename Career Likes Dislikes
Finn Webster "Obese Churros" Merchant Boxes Football
Jasmine Norton "Five Hot Dogs" Mole Chalk Toilets
Adalyn Barber Old Timer Soda Washing Machines
Gianna Barker Meteorologist Glass Singing
Victor Hampton Blacksmith Harmonica Essential Oils

Cipher



                

                
 
                

                

                

                

                

                

The Fuck Is This?

After years of playing Dungeons & Dragons, I decided to make a variation where everything is improv. The DM knows as much as the players and you tell a story together - sitcom style. We use this site as a quest starter, think of some characters, and see how much we can make each other laugh.

It's designed to be simple, portable, and dependent on being creative & inventive. I wanted a framework to guide the plot forward but let us find the story. This page is just a guide to help the stories become too redundant - take as much as you want, ignore as much as you need. If you want to follow along with our adventures or read some examples, check out my personal story notes.

This concept and site was crafted by Andrew Maruska with linguistic help from Evan Stark

But how?

The Most Important Rule

Be Silly. The goal is to laugh not to have a normal adventure. Someone wants to go to the moon? Fuck yeah they do and we're going to do it with medieval technology.

Set Up

Give the players a home base, a year they want to play in, and some general ownership of the setup. It's more successful when everyone has helped create the world because when a player makes suggestions it's easier to integrate them without feeling too precious. It helps to have a figurehead that assigns the quest to authoritatively start.

Characters

90% of creating a character here is a funny voice you're forced to talk in for 3 hours. I typically have people pick one trait they want to be good at and give them a slight advantage when using that - and the same for a negative trait. Don't overcomplicate it. They wanna be a skateboarder who can't feel love? perfect. +2 to cool & -2 to social acceptance.

Rolling

This can be whatever you want but as a general rule I use d20's as a graded scale. Sometimes, I craft the roll to mimic the action i.e. if they are walking a tight rope then might need to roll a 10 because 20 & 1 make them fall to one side or the other. Rolling in D&D got boring so make it fun again.

Dungeon Master

Your goal is to say 'Yes and...' but realistically it's 'Yes and roll to see if you can actually do that triple backflip down the cliff to mount the attacking phoenix...' - It's okay to make them fail, just don't tell them no. This guide is to help you be 1 step ahead of the players but it can't know the vibe of the room, have some empathy and play to the crowd.

Ending

No one can tell you this. The guide is to help you get 1/3 of the adventure set up and the rest will be created by the adventuring party. Have fun with it and try to tie up some loose ends at the end (or don't and bring them back for another adventure).