The Director Welcomes You

The Tree Silence Incident

#2a938c

Location

Cool, Dry Kenya

Time of Day

5:5

Extraction Point

72 Miles SSW

Time to Complete

41 Hours

Spy Deputies,
As you can see you are trapped inside fly above a Compact Mansion . We almost couldn't find you — Please explain when you get back. All we know is "One starfish" is responsible and they sent us this message - "The group finds a random cow at the hive". Your mission was clandestine, achieve what you can.

Hopefully you still have that Rusty Toothbrush hidden on you.

— The Burner Phone you were holding self destructs.

The Villain Dossier

Name

Elias Fox

Alias

"One starfish"

Features

4' 5"

Blue eyes

A second belly button / Left thumb

Organization

The Association of Miniature Internet

Emotions

Disgusted

Personality

Weekly Evasive

Motive

Make a lot of money because they straight up craycray

Bodyguard

Alex the "Huge Gargoyle"

Physical Size

Full-grown

Story

Additional Locations

The Girthy Masquerade

Pitch Black Forge

Death Port

Random Events

Procession Is frozen into a block of ice

Soup screams at the top of their lungs

Crow gathers near a point of interest

Potato runs over an infant

World

Stores

Khloe's Pan Warehouse

Mitchell's Metal chair Collective

Thomas's Pan Du jour

Ryan's Rubber Plant Labs

Traps

Arrow

Rune of Paralyzation of Silence

Objects

Pan children's replica

Pan that is glowing

Secret Metal chair

Hidden Staff

Polearm of Silence

Wand of Wonder

Caster goes berserk in the presence of royalty

People

Name Codename Career Likes Dislikes
Roman Mitchell "The Tongues" Merchant Peanut Butter Horses
Maddox Thomas "Two Cappuccinos" Mole Lamps Scarves
Asher Smith Surgeon Flowers Cartography
Khloe Burton Cosmetologist Water Chili
Luke Ryan Old Timer Contracts Horses

Cipher



                

                
 
                

                

                

                

                

                

The Fuck Is This?

After years of playing Dungeons & Dragons, I decided to make a variation where everything is improv. The DM knows as much as the players and you tell a story together - sitcom style. We use this site as a quest starter, think of some characters, and see how much we can make each other laugh.

It's designed to be simple, portable, and dependent on being creative & inventive. I wanted a framework to guide the plot forward but let us find the story. This page is just a guide to help the stories become too redundant - take as much as you want, ignore as much as you need. If you want to follow along with our adventures or read some examples, check out my personal story notes.

This concept and site was crafted by Andrew Maruska with linguistic help from Evan Stark

But how?

The Most Important Rule

Be Silly. The goal is to laugh not to have a normal adventure. Someone wants to go to the moon? Fuck yeah they do and we're going to do it with medieval technology.

Set Up

Give the players a home base, a year they want to play in, and some general ownership of the setup. It's more successful when everyone has helped create the world because when a player makes suggestions it's easier to integrate them without feeling too precious. It helps to have a figurehead that assigns the quest to authoritatively start.

Characters

90% of creating a character here is a funny voice you're forced to talk in for 3 hours. I typically have people pick one trait they want to be good at and give them a slight advantage when using that - and the same for a negative trait. Don't overcomplicate it. They wanna be a skateboarder who can't feel love? perfect. +2 to cool & -2 to social acceptance.

Rolling

This can be whatever you want but as a general rule I use d20's as a graded scale. Sometimes, I craft the roll to mimic the action i.e. if they are walking a tight rope then might need to roll a 10 because 20 & 1 make them fall to one side or the other. Rolling in D&D got boring so make it fun again.

Dungeon Master

Your goal is to say 'Yes and...' but realistically it's 'Yes and roll to see if you can actually do that triple backflip down the cliff to mount the attacking phoenix...' - It's okay to make them fail, just don't tell them no. This guide is to help you be 1 step ahead of the players but it can't know the vibe of the room, have some empathy and play to the crowd.

Ending

No one can tell you this. The guide is to help you get 1/3 of the adventure set up and the rest will be created by the adventuring party. Have fun with it and try to tie up some loose ends at the end (or don't and bring them back for another adventure).