The Director Welcomes You
Operation — Affluent Pot
#df66c7
Spy Deputies, It seems "Five Dragon" has gone level 5. They have been broadcasting this message "An out of place door appears at the Frozen palace". We need you to eliminate them, Boastfully. Their last known location was recorded at 23:19. You have a Polished Sun Lotion as a last resort. Use carefully.
— The CD player you were holding self destructs.
Malachi Hunt
"Five Dragon"
7' 8"
Red eyes
Stretch Marks / Right hand
The Order of Brave Faucet
Grief-stricken
Boastfully Ugliest
Disrupt the military to save humanity
Mitch the "Facetious Kraken"
Puny
The Affluent Pond
Compact Pond
Doom Business
Vagabond Glistens gently
Diary Finds gold in the water
Gang Is frozen into a block of ice
Bard Pulls on the coat tails of one of the adventurers
Waylon's Suit of armor Bureau
Hardy's Chair Creative
Baker's Credenza International
Deleon's Shelf of alcohol Outlet
Rune of Paralyzation
Crushing Room of Extinction
Suit of armor that has been hollowed out
Credenza with a False bottom
Secret Chair
Hidden Longsword
Lance of Extinction
All water within 50 yards looks foul but is fresh and sweet
| Name | Codename | Career | Likes | Dislikes |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| Benjamin Hardy | "Two Churros" | Merchant | Potatoes | Scarves |
| Gabriella Baker | "All Scars" | Mole | Sun Glasses | Dice |
| Maddox James | Cranky | Chocolate | Death | |
| Waylon Love | Envious | Potatoes | Rocks | |
| Abraham Deleon | Ghost | Snowglobes | Lions |
After years of playing Dungeons & Dragons, I decided to make a variation where everything is improv. The DM knows as much as the players and you tell a story together - sitcom style. We use this site as a quest starter, think of some characters, and see how much we can make each other laugh.
It's designed to be simple, portable, and dependent on being creative & inventive. I wanted a framework to guide the plot forward but let us find the story. This page is just a guide to help the stories become too redundant - take as much as you want, ignore as much as you need. If you want to follow along with our adventures or read some examples, check out my personal story notes.
This concept and site was crafted by Andrew Maruska with linguistic help from Evan Stark
Be Silly. The goal is to laugh not to have a normal adventure. Someone wants to go to the moon? Fuck yeah they do and we're going to do it with medieval technology.
Set UpGive the players a home base, a year they want to play in, and some general ownership of the setup. It's more successful when everyone has helped create the world because when a player makes suggestions it's easier to integrate them without feeling too precious. It helps to have a figurehead that assigns the quest to authoritatively start.
Characters90% of creating a character here is a funny voice you're forced to talk in for 3 hours. I typically have people pick one trait they want to be good at and give them a slight advantage when using that - and the same for a negative trait. Don't overcomplicate it. They wanna be a skateboarder who can't feel love? perfect. +2 to cool & -2 to social acceptance.
RollingThis can be whatever you want but as a general rule I use d20's as a graded scale. Sometimes, I craft the roll to mimic the action i.e. if they are walking a tight rope then might need to roll a 10 because 20 & 1 make them fall to one side or the other. Rolling in D&D got boring so make it fun again.
Dungeon MasterYour goal is to say 'Yes and...' but realistically it's 'Yes and roll to see if you can actually do that triple backflip down the cliff to mount the attacking phoenix...' - It's okay to make them fail, just don't tell them no. This guide is to help you be 1 step ahead of the players but it can't know the vibe of the room, have some empathy and play to the crowd.
EndingNo one can tell you this. The guide is to help you get 1/3 of the adventure set up and the rest will be created by the adventuring party. Have fun with it and try to tie up some loose ends at the end (or don't and bring them back for another adventure).