The Director Welcomes You

Operation — Scrawny Country

#747873

Location

Rainy, Cloudy Seychelles

Time of Day

16:2

Extraction Point

32 Miles NNE

Time to Complete

42 Hours

Scrutinizers,
We need your help. Agent Sebastian Miranda has gone missing and we believe "Slow Ghost" is responsible. They were last seen in Seychelles at 20:03. The agent sent one final message – "A white horse dashes past at the Rainbow Mountain". Take this Evil Bikini - it was their favorite tool and might help you.

— The Tape recorder you were holding self destructs.

The Villain Dossier

Name

Jaxon Lynch

Alias

"Slow Ghost"

Features

7' 5"

Hazel eyes

Large deep scar / Neck

Organization

The Gang of Edgy Snake

Emotions

Calm

Personality

Victoriously Thorough

Motive

Make a lot of money for fear of the heroes

Bodyguard

Jerry the "Broad Elephants"

Physical Size

Teeny

Story

Additional Locations

The Scrawny Lagoon

Touristy Grove

Amnesia Fortress

Random Events

Dead Animal Is throwing a BBQ

Cauldron chase a suspect

Reindeer Balances on a ledge

Bag of Lemons Crashes slowly

World

Stores

Jack's Loveseat Outlet

Howard's Large book Bureau

Medina's Chaise Warehouse

Miranda's Landscape Technologies

Traps

Crushing Room

Compacting Room of Sanitation

Objects

Loveseat that has been hollowed out

Chaise that is glowing

Secret Large book

Hidden Boiled Leather

Bottle of Sanitation

Wand of Wonder

Caster appears to have been carved from wood with an axe

People

Name Codename Career Likes Dislikes
Weston Howard "Blue Muscles" Merchant Shirts Rock n' Roll
Roman Medina "Violet Legs" Mole Notes Basketball
Ella Cooper Cosmetologist Shirts Rubber Bands
Jack Fuller Annoyed Broccoli Soap
Sebastian Miranda Hairdresser Jazz Deodorant

Cipher



                

                
 
                

                

                

                

                

                

The Fuck Is This?

After years of playing Dungeons & Dragons, I decided to make a variation where everything is improv. The DM knows as much as the players and you tell a story together - sitcom style. We use this site as a quest starter, think of some characters, and see how much we can make each other laugh.

It's designed to be simple, portable, and dependent on being creative & inventive. I wanted a framework to guide the plot forward but let us find the story. This page is just a guide to help the stories become too redundant - take as much as you want, ignore as much as you need. If you want to follow along with our adventures or read some examples, check out my personal story notes.

This concept and site was crafted by Andrew Maruska with linguistic help from Evan Stark

But how?

The Most Important Rule

Be Silly. The goal is to laugh not to have a normal adventure. Someone wants to go to the moon? Fuck yeah they do and we're going to do it with medieval technology.

Set Up

Give the players a home base, a year they want to play in, and some general ownership of the setup. It's more successful when everyone has helped create the world because when a player makes suggestions it's easier to integrate them without feeling too precious. It helps to have a figurehead that assigns the quest to authoritatively start.

Characters

90% of creating a character here is a funny voice you're forced to talk in for 3 hours. I typically have people pick one trait they want to be good at and give them a slight advantage when using that - and the same for a negative trait. Don't overcomplicate it. They wanna be a skateboarder who can't feel love? perfect. +2 to cool & -2 to social acceptance.

Rolling

This can be whatever you want but as a general rule I use d20's as a graded scale. Sometimes, I craft the roll to mimic the action i.e. if they are walking a tight rope then might need to roll a 10 because 20 & 1 make them fall to one side or the other. Rolling in D&D got boring so make it fun again.

Dungeon Master

Your goal is to say 'Yes and...' but realistically it's 'Yes and roll to see if you can actually do that triple backflip down the cliff to mount the attacking phoenix...' - It's okay to make them fail, just don't tell them no. This guide is to help you be 1 step ahead of the players but it can't know the vibe of the room, have some empathy and play to the crowd.

Ending

No one can tell you this. The guide is to help you get 1/3 of the adventure set up and the rest will be created by the adventuring party. Have fun with it and try to tie up some loose ends at the end (or don't and bring them back for another adventure).