The Director Welcomes You

The Boned Harmony Operation

#02930b

Location

Gloomy, Windy Sri Lanka

Time of Day

20:13

Extraction Point

39 Miles SE

Time to Complete

16 Hours

Examiners,
As you can see you are trapped inside within a Polluted Arcade . We almost couldn't find you — Please explain when you get back. All we know is "Sharp Leech" is responsible and they sent us this message - "The group finds a random cow at the Sacrificial Hole". Your mission was black ops, achieve what you can.

Hopefully you still have that Heavy Bottle hidden on you.

— The Messenger Pigeon you were holding self destructs.

The Villain Dossier

Name

Laila Parsons

Alias

"Sharp Leech"

Features

6' 5"

Amber eyes

Small mole / Right thumb

Organization

The Alliance of Clumsy Fried Chicken

Emotions

Shocked

Personality

Selfishly Mushy

Motive

Disrupt the military to achieve their destiny

Bodyguard

Mitch the "Loose Owl"

Physical Size

Baby

Story

Additional Locations

The Boned Crypt

Pitch Black Barn Dance

Silence City

Random Events

Musical explodes

Crazy Man Glistens gently

Fairy emerges

Woman Is throwing a BBQ

World

Stores

Alexander's Stamp Set Convenience store

Jacobs's Wingback chair Couture

Neal's Easel Logistics

Becker's Toolset Du jour

Traps

Flooded Corridor

Extended Bane of Instability

Objects

Stamp Set made of heavy metal

Easel that has been hollowed out

Secret Wingback chair

Hidden Glasses

File of Instability

Wand of Wonder

Target asserts that he will go insane unless he eats 1d4 apples

People

Name Codename Career Likes Dislikes
George Jacobs "Left Feet" Merchant Stickers Painting
Avery Neal "Golden Elbows" Mole Teeth Soda
Hannah Warren Elevator Mechanic Comic Books Painting
Alexander Cole Pharmacist Easter Jigsaw Puzzles
Gracie Becker Scientist Chocolate Trees

Cipher



                

                
 
                

                

                

                

                

                

The Fuck Is This?

After years of playing Dungeons & Dragons, I decided to make a variation where everything is improv. The DM knows as much as the players and you tell a story together - sitcom style. We use this site as a quest starter, think of some characters, and see how much we can make each other laugh.

It's designed to be simple, portable, and dependent on being creative & inventive. I wanted a framework to guide the plot forward but let us find the story. This page is just a guide to help the stories become too redundant - take as much as you want, ignore as much as you need. If you want to follow along with our adventures or read some examples, check out my personal story notes.

This concept and site was crafted by Andrew Maruska with linguistic help from Evan Stark

But how?

The Most Important Rule

Be Silly. The goal is to laugh not to have a normal adventure. Someone wants to go to the moon? Fuck yeah they do and we're going to do it with medieval technology.

Set Up

Give the players a home base, a year they want to play in, and some general ownership of the setup. It's more successful when everyone has helped create the world because when a player makes suggestions it's easier to integrate them without feeling too precious. It helps to have a figurehead that assigns the quest to authoritatively start.

Characters

90% of creating a character here is a funny voice you're forced to talk in for 3 hours. I typically have people pick one trait they want to be good at and give them a slight advantage when using that - and the same for a negative trait. Don't overcomplicate it. They wanna be a skateboarder who can't feel love? perfect. +2 to cool & -2 to social acceptance.

Rolling

This can be whatever you want but as a general rule I use d20's as a graded scale. Sometimes, I craft the roll to mimic the action i.e. if they are walking a tight rope then might need to roll a 10 because 20 & 1 make them fall to one side or the other. Rolling in D&D got boring so make it fun again.

Dungeon Master

Your goal is to say 'Yes and...' but realistically it's 'Yes and roll to see if you can actually do that triple backflip down the cliff to mount the attacking phoenix...' - It's okay to make them fail, just don't tell them no. This guide is to help you be 1 step ahead of the players but it can't know the vibe of the room, have some empathy and play to the crowd.

Ending

No one can tell you this. The guide is to help you get 1/3 of the adventure set up and the rest will be created by the adventuring party. Have fun with it and try to tie up some loose ends at the end (or don't and bring them back for another adventure).