The Director Welcomes You

The Teeth Reservation Incident

#d6d36a

Location

Miserable, Cool Oman

Time of Day

2:19

Extraction Point

151 Miles NNW

Time to Complete

27 Hours

Examiners,
As you can see you are trapped inside approach a Compact Crypt . We almost couldn't find you — Please explain when you get back. All we know is "Orange Vampires" is responsible and they sent us this message - "An object nearby starts bleeding at the hive". Your mission was black ops, achieve what you can.

Hopefully you still have that Beautiful Flute hidden on you.

— The Tape recorder you were holding self destructs.

The Villain Dossier

Name

Aaron Nelson

Alias

"Orange Vampires"

Features

6' 1"

Brown eyes

A second belly button / Right eye

Organization

The Society of Tenacious Cast Iron Pan

Emotions

Inferior

Personality

Carelessly Insolent

Motive

Take over a government to cause catastrophe

Bodyguard

Jimmy the "Good Ogre"

Physical Size

Small-scale

Story

Additional Locations

The Mango Park

Polluted Jungle

Excitement Mansion

Random Events

Woman meets disaster

Bear stop the party and asks questions

Diary approaches

Transport overflows

World

Stores

Oscar's Flowers Growing Du jour

Saunders's Suit of armor Market

Potter's Platter Creative

Cummings's Urn Convenience store

Traps

Hail of Needles

Dropping Ceiling of Reservation

Objects

Flowers Growing with a False bottom

Platter that is glowing

Secret Suit of armor

Hidden Sickle

Cat of Reservation

Wand of Wonder

All within 50 yards have the exact same voice

People

Name Codename Career Likes Dislikes
Gianna Saunders "The Noses" Merchant Whipped Cream Dinosaurs
Madeline Potter "Slow Arms" Mole Limes Harmonica
Dylan Christensen Athlete Attention Harmonica
Oscar Fleming Police Officer Writers Drinking
Brielle Cummings Butcher Lipstick Coffee

Cipher



                

                
 
                

                

                

                

                

                

The Fuck Is This?

After years of playing Dungeons & Dragons, I decided to make a variation where everything is improv. The DM knows as much as the players and you tell a story together - sitcom style. We use this site as a quest starter, think of some characters, and see how much we can make each other laugh.

It's designed to be simple, portable, and dependent on being creative & inventive. I wanted a framework to guide the plot forward but let us find the story. This page is just a guide to help the stories become too redundant - take as much as you want, ignore as much as you need. If you want to follow along with our adventures or read some examples, check out my personal story notes.

This concept and site was crafted by Andrew Maruska with linguistic help from Evan Stark

But how?

The Most Important Rule

Be Silly. The goal is to laugh not to have a normal adventure. Someone wants to go to the moon? Fuck yeah they do and we're going to do it with medieval technology.

Set Up

Give the players a home base, a year they want to play in, and some general ownership of the setup. It's more successful when everyone has helped create the world because when a player makes suggestions it's easier to integrate them without feeling too precious. It helps to have a figurehead that assigns the quest to authoritatively start.

Characters

90% of creating a character here is a funny voice you're forced to talk in for 3 hours. I typically have people pick one trait they want to be good at and give them a slight advantage when using that - and the same for a negative trait. Don't overcomplicate it. They wanna be a skateboarder who can't feel love? perfect. +2 to cool & -2 to social acceptance.

Rolling

This can be whatever you want but as a general rule I use d20's as a graded scale. Sometimes, I craft the roll to mimic the action i.e. if they are walking a tight rope then might need to roll a 10 because 20 & 1 make them fall to one side or the other. Rolling in D&D got boring so make it fun again.

Dungeon Master

Your goal is to say 'Yes and...' but realistically it's 'Yes and roll to see if you can actually do that triple backflip down the cliff to mount the attacking phoenix...' - It's okay to make them fail, just don't tell them no. This guide is to help you be 1 step ahead of the players but it can't know the vibe of the room, have some empathy and play to the crowd.

Ending

No one can tell you this. The guide is to help you get 1/3 of the adventure set up and the rest will be created by the adventuring party. Have fun with it and try to tie up some loose ends at the end (or don't and bring them back for another adventure).