The Director Welcomes You

The Rum Virtue Incident

#c52247

Location

Chilly, Warm East Timor

Time of Day

11:38

Extraction Point

143 Miles SE

Time to Complete

38 Hours

Undercover Emissaries,
This week should be easy. You are delivering a Spare brick with a False bottom. Get to East Timor at 18:01

Good Luck.

— The iPod you were holding self destructs.

The Villain Dossier

Name

Elias Solis

Alias

"Bullet Eel"

Features

6' 1"

Green eyes

Faint curved scar / Crotch

Organization

The Incorporated of Calamitous Buffet

Emotions

Shocked

Personality

Keenly Caustic

Motive

Take over a country to save humanity

Bodyguard

Jimmy the "Bad Golem"

Physical Size

Minuscule

Story

Additional Locations

The Turbulent Circus

Abandoned House

Annihilation Suburbs

Random Events

Prostitute Is frozen into a block of ice

Baker Bounces oddly

Biscuit overflows

Panhandler scurries by

World

Stores

Calvin's Spare brick Labs

French's Ring Atelier

Kim's Trophy Ventures

Howell's Clamp Chic Chåteau

Traps

Swinging Block

Rune of Paralyzation of Virtue

Objects

Spare brick with a False bottom

Trophy with a False bottom

Secret Ring

Hidden Necklace

Stave of Virtue

Wand of Wonder

Target snorts like a pig before and after he says his name

People

Name Codename Career Likes Dislikes
Giovanni French "Mad Bagels" Merchant Dice Plushies
Norah Kim "Silver Lungs" Mole Money Broccoli
Jeremy Fisher Plumber Water Bells
Calvin Erickson Physician Flowers Slippers
Chloe Howell Veteran Shirts Balloons

Cipher



                

                
 
                

                

                

                

                

                

The Fuck Is This?

After years of playing Dungeons & Dragons, I decided to make a variation where everything is improv. The DM knows as much as the players and you tell a story together - sitcom style. We use this site as a quest starter, think of some characters, and see how much we can make each other laugh.

It's designed to be simple, portable, and dependent on being creative & inventive. I wanted a framework to guide the plot forward but let us find the story. This page is just a guide to help the stories become too redundant - take as much as you want, ignore as much as you need. If you want to follow along with our adventures or read some examples, check out my personal story notes.

This concept and site was crafted by Andrew Maruska with linguistic help from Evan Stark

But how?

The Most Important Rule

Be Silly. The goal is to laugh not to have a normal adventure. Someone wants to go to the moon? Fuck yeah they do and we're going to do it with medieval technology.

Set Up

Give the players a home base, a year they want to play in, and some general ownership of the setup. It's more successful when everyone has helped create the world because when a player makes suggestions it's easier to integrate them without feeling too precious. It helps to have a figurehead that assigns the quest to authoritatively start.

Characters

90% of creating a character here is a funny voice you're forced to talk in for 3 hours. I typically have people pick one trait they want to be good at and give them a slight advantage when using that - and the same for a negative trait. Don't overcomplicate it. They wanna be a skateboarder who can't feel love? perfect. +2 to cool & -2 to social acceptance.

Rolling

This can be whatever you want but as a general rule I use d20's as a graded scale. Sometimes, I craft the roll to mimic the action i.e. if they are walking a tight rope then might need to roll a 10 because 20 & 1 make them fall to one side or the other. Rolling in D&D got boring so make it fun again.

Dungeon Master

Your goal is to say 'Yes and...' but realistically it's 'Yes and roll to see if you can actually do that triple backflip down the cliff to mount the attacking phoenix...' - It's okay to make them fail, just don't tell them no. This guide is to help you be 1 step ahead of the players but it can't know the vibe of the room, have some empathy and play to the crowd.

Ending

No one can tell you this. The guide is to help you get 1/3 of the adventure set up and the rest will be created by the adventuring party. Have fun with it and try to tie up some loose ends at the end (or don't and bring them back for another adventure).