The Director Welcomes You

Productions Royale

#ca5268

Location

Balmy, Mild Maldives

Time of Day

11:11

Extraction Point

137 Miles NNE

Time to Complete

31 Hours

Informants,
It seems "Fat Kangaroos" has gone level 9. They have been broadcasting this message "The group finds a sword in a stone at the Top of the carousel wheel". We need you to eliminate them, Physically. Their last known location was recorded at 01:13. You have a Dull Socks as a last resort. Use carefully.

— The Origami Swan you were holding self destructs.

The Villain Dossier

Name

Jeremiah Henry

Alias

"Fat Kangaroos"

Features

6' 5"

Red eyes

Stretch Marks / Right arm

Organization

The Association of Dangerous Donkey

Emotions

Hopeless

Personality

Physically Bitter

Motive

Make a lot of money to inspire a rebellion

Bodyguard

Nick the "Brutish Porpoises"

Physical Size

Huge

Story

Additional Locations

The Famous Lake

Pitch Black Castle

Destruction Pond

Random Events

Dozen Eggs Ignites violently

Leopard is being loudly arrested

Carcass strikes the ground

Horse Carriage arrives in the mail

World

Stores

Carlos's Lounge Chair Productions

Guerrero's Ceramic Crock Cosmetics

Zimmerman's Lamp Arcade

Rice's Crock Department store

Traps

Dropping Ceiling

Bricks from Ceiling of Cleanliness

Objects

Lounge Chair children's replica

Lamp with a False bottom

Secret Ceramic Crock

Hidden Polearm

Throwing Dart of Cleanliness

Wand of Wonder

Next person struck by caster’s magic goes insane for 2d4-1 days

People

Name Codename Career Likes Dislikes
Michael Guerrero "Drowsy Falafels" Merchant Glitter Lamps
Alex Zimmerman "Silver Bones" Mole Gym Memberships Glitter
Alyssa Clark Exhilarated Batteries Attention
Carlos Sullivan Accountant Eggs Rock n' Roll
Hailey Rice Zestful Socks Socks

Cipher



                

                
 
                

                

                

                

                

                

The Fuck Is This?

After years of playing Dungeons & Dragons, I decided to make a variation where everything is improv. The DM knows as much as the players and you tell a story together - sitcom style. We use this site as a quest starter, think of some characters, and see how much we can make each other laugh.

It's designed to be simple, portable, and dependent on being creative & inventive. I wanted a framework to guide the plot forward but let us find the story. This page is just a guide to help the stories become too redundant - take as much as you want, ignore as much as you need. If you want to follow along with our adventures or read some examples, check out my personal story notes.

This concept and site was crafted by Andrew Maruska with linguistic help from Evan Stark

But how?

The Most Important Rule

Be Silly. The goal is to laugh not to have a normal adventure. Someone wants to go to the moon? Fuck yeah they do and we're going to do it with medieval technology.

Set Up

Give the players a home base, a year they want to play in, and some general ownership of the setup. It's more successful when everyone has helped create the world because when a player makes suggestions it's easier to integrate them without feeling too precious. It helps to have a figurehead that assigns the quest to authoritatively start.

Characters

90% of creating a character here is a funny voice you're forced to talk in for 3 hours. I typically have people pick one trait they want to be good at and give them a slight advantage when using that - and the same for a negative trait. Don't overcomplicate it. They wanna be a skateboarder who can't feel love? perfect. +2 to cool & -2 to social acceptance.

Rolling

This can be whatever you want but as a general rule I use d20's as a graded scale. Sometimes, I craft the roll to mimic the action i.e. if they are walking a tight rope then might need to roll a 10 because 20 & 1 make them fall to one side or the other. Rolling in D&D got boring so make it fun again.

Dungeon Master

Your goal is to say 'Yes and...' but realistically it's 'Yes and roll to see if you can actually do that triple backflip down the cliff to mount the attacking phoenix...' - It's okay to make them fail, just don't tell them no. This guide is to help you be 1 step ahead of the players but it can't know the vibe of the room, have some empathy and play to the crowd.

Ending

No one can tell you this. The guide is to help you get 1/3 of the adventure set up and the rest will be created by the adventuring party. Have fun with it and try to tie up some loose ends at the end (or don't and bring them back for another adventure).