The Director Welcomes You

Who is Peter Trousers?

#055990

Location

Wet, Icy Benin

Time of Day

5:43

Extraction Point

177 Miles SWW

Time to Complete

19 Hours

Detectives,
We need your help. Agent Emma Hardy has gone missing and we believe "Blue Troll" is responsible. They were last seen in Benin at 05:02. The agent sent one final message – "A vagrant asks for money at the Dragon's Sea". Take this Light Bicycle - it was their favorite tool and might help you.

— The Tablet of Stone you were holding self destructs.

The Villain Dossier

Name

Melody Reynolds

Alias

"Blue Troll"

Features

6' 7"

Green eyes

Faint curved scar / Left thumb

Organization

The Division of Purple Hole

Emotions

Awkward

Personality

Quickly Uninterested

Motive

Disrupt the military out of desperation

Bodyguard

Peter the "Proud Porpoises"

Physical Size

Colossal

Story

Additional Locations

The Yummy Barn Dance

Deserted Port

Irritation Acropolis

Random Events

Crowd overflows

Gang Is under a curse

Cat Bounces oddly

Carcass Evades the law

World

Stores

Victoria's Bicycle Logistics

Weaver's Bell Beauty Stop

Butler's Tea Set Couture

Hardy's Quill and Ink Wardrobe

Traps

Incendiary Cloud

Object Smeared with Poison of Darkness

Objects

Bicycle that has been hollowed out

Tea Set made of heavy metal

Secret Bell

Hidden Necklace

Dagger of Darkness

Wand of Wonder

Caster has an almost paralyzing fear of death and the dead

People

Name Codename Career Likes Dislikes
Melody Weaver "Green Parmigianas" Merchant Candy Singing
Ximena Butler "All Scars" Mole Rocks Bears
Adaline Norton Journalist Jazz Cooking
Victoria Black Scientist Baseball Ice Cubes
Emma Hardy Restless Batteries Socks

Cipher



                

                
 
                

                

                

                

                

                

The Fuck Is This?

After years of playing Dungeons & Dragons, I decided to make a variation where everything is improv. The DM knows as much as the players and you tell a story together - sitcom style. We use this site as a quest starter, think of some characters, and see how much we can make each other laugh.

It's designed to be simple, portable, and dependent on being creative & inventive. I wanted a framework to guide the plot forward but let us find the story. This page is just a guide to help the stories become too redundant - take as much as you want, ignore as much as you need. If you want to follow along with our adventures or read some examples, check out my personal story notes.

This concept and site was crafted by Andrew Maruska with linguistic help from Evan Stark

But how?

The Most Important Rule

Be Silly. The goal is to laugh not to have a normal adventure. Someone wants to go to the moon? Fuck yeah they do and we're going to do it with medieval technology.

Set Up

Give the players a home base, a year they want to play in, and some general ownership of the setup. It's more successful when everyone has helped create the world because when a player makes suggestions it's easier to integrate them without feeling too precious. It helps to have a figurehead that assigns the quest to authoritatively start.

Characters

90% of creating a character here is a funny voice you're forced to talk in for 3 hours. I typically have people pick one trait they want to be good at and give them a slight advantage when using that - and the same for a negative trait. Don't overcomplicate it. They wanna be a skateboarder who can't feel love? perfect. +2 to cool & -2 to social acceptance.

Rolling

This can be whatever you want but as a general rule I use d20's as a graded scale. Sometimes, I craft the roll to mimic the action i.e. if they are walking a tight rope then might need to roll a 10 because 20 & 1 make them fall to one side or the other. Rolling in D&D got boring so make it fun again.

Dungeon Master

Your goal is to say 'Yes and...' but realistically it's 'Yes and roll to see if you can actually do that triple backflip down the cliff to mount the attacking phoenix...' - It's okay to make them fail, just don't tell them no. This guide is to help you be 1 step ahead of the players but it can't know the vibe of the room, have some empathy and play to the crowd.

Ending

No one can tell you this. The guide is to help you get 1/3 of the adventure set up and the rest will be created by the adventuring party. Have fun with it and try to tie up some loose ends at the end (or don't and bring them back for another adventure).