The Director Welcomes You

The Love The Blackest Black Protocol

#23d0f3

Location

Mild, Mild Algeria

Time of Day

9:13

Extraction Point

76 Miles NE

Time to Complete

2 Hours

Investigators,
I have sent you to approach a Rundown Barn Dance to look for a suspect by the name "Silver Roc". This mission is black bag. Their recent activity is concerning and we need you to rescue our field agent. We don't know much about their goals but we've intercepted this cryptic message – "The group finds a dollar on the ground at the giants footsteps".

We're low budget this mission – I've packed a Invisible Binocular in your kit to help.

— The Origami Swan you were holding self destructs.

The Villain Dossier

Name

Jesus Day

Alias

"Silver Roc"

Features

5' 6"

Blue eyes

Large deep scar / Right leg

Organization

The Agency of Jolly Underwear

Emotions

Insecure

Personality

Colorfully Bitter

Motive

Make a lot of money to achieve their destiny

Bodyguard

Harold the "Fugly Drunken Irish Guy"

Physical Size

Narrow

Story

Additional Locations

The Hissing Chateau

Underground Circus

Optimism Citadel

Random Events

Pine Branch Adopts a nearby child

Hoard stop the party and asks questions

Sewer Is under a curse

Building Catches leprosy

World

Stores

Alexander's Mounted Animal Specialities

Nichols's Statue Arcade

Gordon's Lipstick Labs

Goodman's Candelabra Consulting

Traps

Burning Hands

Suspicious door with lock of The Blackest Black

Objects

Mounted Animal that is glowing

Lipstick children's replica

Secret Statue

Hidden Polearm

Boomerang of The Blackest Black

Wand of Wonder

Target’s arms are replaced by inert duplicates of his head

People

Name Codename Career Likes Dislikes
Molly Nichols "Little Fingers" Merchant Attention Attention
Wesley Gordon "Little Ankles" Mole Snowglobes Clocks
Jose Campos Journalist Robots Syrup
Alexander Aguilar Master Distiller Music Glass
Victoria Goodman Funeral Director Jazz Music

Cipher



                


                

                    
                    

                


                

                    
                    
 
                


                

                    
                    

                


                

                    
                    

                


                

                    
                    

                

                
                

                    
                    

                


                

                    
                    

                

              

            

          

        

      

    



    
      
      
 
        

          

            
The Fuck Is This?

          

          

            
            
After years of playing Dungeons & Dragons, I decided to make a variation where everything is improv. The DM knows as much as the players and you tell a story together - sitcom style. We use this site as a quest starter, think of some characters, and see how much we can make each other laugh.

            
            
It's designed to be simple, portable, and dependent on being creative & inventive. I wanted a framework to guide the plot forward but let us find the story. This page is just a guide to help the stories become too redundant - take as much as you want, ignore as much as you need. If you want to follow along with our adventures or read some examples, check out  my personal story notes.

            
            
This concept and site was crafted by Andrew Maruska with linguistic help from Evan Stark

          

        

      

    


    
      
      
 
        

          

            
But how?

          

          
            
            The Most Important Rule
            
Be Silly. The goal is to laugh not to have a normal adventure. Someone wants to go to the moon? Fuck yeah they do and we're going to do it with medieval technology.

            
            Set Up
            
Give the players a home base, a year they want to play in, and some general ownership of the setup. It's more successful when everyone has helped create the world because when a player makes suggestions it's easier to integrate them without feeling too precious. It helps to have a figurehead that assigns the quest to authoritatively start.

            
            Characters
            
90% of creating a character here is a funny voice you're forced to talk in for 3 hours. I typically have people pick one trait they want to be good at and give them a slight advantage when using that - and the same for a negative trait. Don't overcomplicate it. They wanna be a skateboarder who can't feel love? perfect. +2 to cool & -2 to social acceptance. 

            
            Rolling
            
This can be whatever you want but as a general rule I use d20's as a graded scale. Sometimes, I craft the roll to mimic the action i.e. if they are walking a tight rope then might need to roll a 10 because 20 & 1 make them fall to one side or the other. Rolling in D&D got boring so make it fun again. 

            
            Dungeon Master
            
Your goal is to say 'Yes and...' but realistically it's 'Yes and roll to see if you can actually do that triple backflip down the cliff to mount the attacking phoenix...' - It's okay to make them fail, just don't tell them no. This guide is to help you be 1 step ahead of the players but it can't know the vibe of the room, have some empathy and play to the crowd. 

            
            Ending
            
No one can tell you this. The guide is to help you get 1/3 of the adventure set up and the rest will be created by the adventuring party. Have fun with it and try to tie up some loose ends at the end (or don't and bring them back for another adventure).