The Director Welcomes You

The Magic Reservation Incident

#05a703

Location

Dark, Hot United Kingdom

Time of Day

7:50

Extraction Point

112 Miles NEE

Time to Complete

15 Hours

Scrutinizers,
We need your help. Agent Sadie Gutierrez has gone missing and we believe "White Normal Guy" is responsible. They were last seen in United Kingdom at 24:23. The agent sent one final message – "A mysterious key is found on the ground at the Boneyard". Take this Light Quilt - it was their favorite tool and might help you.

— The Vinyl record player you were holding self destructs.

The Villain Dossier

Name

Alexander Gibbs

Alias

"White Normal Guy"

Features

4' 1"

Green eyes

Stretch Marks / Right hand

Organization

The Incorporated of Mysterious Horse

Emotions

Scornful

Personality

Always Tasteless

Motive

Take over a country for pure destruction

Bodyguard

Chuckie the "Famous Opossums"

Physical Size

Huge

Story

Additional Locations

The Salmon Citadel

Compact Villa

Disaster Chateau

Random Events

Cookie is being loudly arrested

Herd of Chicken Is hurled at the adventurers

Herd of Chicken catches on fire

Biscuit Is being kidnapped

World

Stores

Ayden's Crock Ventures

Jacobs's Cabinet Solutions

Guerrero's Credenza Bureau

Gutierrez's Diary Market

Traps

Javelin

Ceiling Pendulum of Reservation

Objects

Crock that has been hollowed out

Credenza children's replica

Secret Cabinet

Hidden Chewing Gum

Javelins of Reservation

Wand of Wonder

Next weapon nearby to draw blood induces lethargy in its wielder

People

Name Codename Career Likes Dislikes
Lorenzo Jacobs "Dull Bones" Merchant Technology Writers
Rachel Guerrero "Right Spleens" Mole Candy Hamsters
Cecilia Peterson Waiter Doors Pillows
Ayden Sims Veteran Batteries Painting
Sadie Gutierrez Frustrated Television Jigsaw Puzzles

Cipher



                

                
 
                

                

                

                

                

                

The Fuck Is This?

After years of playing Dungeons & Dragons, I decided to make a variation where everything is improv. The DM knows as much as the players and you tell a story together - sitcom style. We use this site as a quest starter, think of some characters, and see how much we can make each other laugh.

It's designed to be simple, portable, and dependent on being creative & inventive. I wanted a framework to guide the plot forward but let us find the story. This page is just a guide to help the stories become too redundant - take as much as you want, ignore as much as you need. If you want to follow along with our adventures or read some examples, check out my personal story notes.

This concept and site was crafted by Andrew Maruska with linguistic help from Evan Stark

But how?

The Most Important Rule

Be Silly. The goal is to laugh not to have a normal adventure. Someone wants to go to the moon? Fuck yeah they do and we're going to do it with medieval technology.

Set Up

Give the players a home base, a year they want to play in, and some general ownership of the setup. It's more successful when everyone has helped create the world because when a player makes suggestions it's easier to integrate them without feeling too precious. It helps to have a figurehead that assigns the quest to authoritatively start.

Characters

90% of creating a character here is a funny voice you're forced to talk in for 3 hours. I typically have people pick one trait they want to be good at and give them a slight advantage when using that - and the same for a negative trait. Don't overcomplicate it. They wanna be a skateboarder who can't feel love? perfect. +2 to cool & -2 to social acceptance.

Rolling

This can be whatever you want but as a general rule I use d20's as a graded scale. Sometimes, I craft the roll to mimic the action i.e. if they are walking a tight rope then might need to roll a 10 because 20 & 1 make them fall to one side or the other. Rolling in D&D got boring so make it fun again.

Dungeon Master

Your goal is to say 'Yes and...' but realistically it's 'Yes and roll to see if you can actually do that triple backflip down the cliff to mount the attacking phoenix...' - It's okay to make them fail, just don't tell them no. This guide is to help you be 1 step ahead of the players but it can't know the vibe of the room, have some empathy and play to the crowd.

Ending

No one can tell you this. The guide is to help you get 1/3 of the adventure set up and the rest will be created by the adventuring party. Have fun with it and try to tie up some loose ends at the end (or don't and bring them back for another adventure).