The Director Welcomes You

The Trick Freshness Incident

#259227

Location

Rainy, Hot Cuba

Time of Day

3:50

Extraction Point

76 Miles SSE

Time to Complete

47 Hours

Examiners,
As you can see you are trapped inside the outside of a Expensive Park . We almost couldn't find you — Please explain when you get back. All we know is "Violet Gnome" is responsible and they sent us this message - "The group finds a dead fish at the Golden Fire". Your mission was black ops, achieve what you can.

Hopefully you still have that Vicious Wrench hidden on you.

— The Portable Radio you were holding self destructs.

The Villain Dossier

Name

Brandon Rodgers

Alias

"Violet Gnome"

Features

7' 10"

Brown eyes

Faint curved scar / Left leg

Organization

The Council of Narrow Judge

Emotions

Helpless

Personality

Quirkily Itchy

Motive

Take over a country fueled by conspiracy

Bodyguard

Penelope the "Moist ghost"

Physical Size

Microscopic

Story

Additional Locations

The Worried Palace

Crowded Jungle

Freshness Circus

Random Events

Panhandler Is being detained

Meteor Is under a curse

Storm Gets their hand chopped off

Bum emerges

World

Stores

Dawson's Bible Factory

Stone's Cabinet Emporium

Payne's Crate Creative

McCormick's crutch Chic Chåteau

Traps

Suspicious door with lock

Water-Filled Room of Freshness

Objects

Bible that has been hollowed out

Crate that is glowing

Secret Cabinet

Hidden Shoe

Whip of Freshness

Wand of Wonder

All coins within 50 yards heat to 1,000°

People

Name Codename Career Likes Dislikes
Avery Stone "King Lungs" Merchant Books Dice
Gabriella Payne "Heavy Lemons" Mole Houses Houses
Abel Padilla Dead Tired Bracelets Washing Machines
Dawson Pratt Cleaner Essential Oils Video Games
Evan McCormick Teacher Balloons Eggs

Cipher



                

                
 
                

                

                

                

                

                

The Fuck Is This?

After years of playing Dungeons & Dragons, I decided to make a variation where everything is improv. The DM knows as much as the players and you tell a story together - sitcom style. We use this site as a quest starter, think of some characters, and see how much we can make each other laugh.

It's designed to be simple, portable, and dependent on being creative & inventive. I wanted a framework to guide the plot forward but let us find the story. This page is just a guide to help the stories become too redundant - take as much as you want, ignore as much as you need. If you want to follow along with our adventures or read some examples, check out my personal story notes.

This concept and site was crafted by Andrew Maruska with linguistic help from Evan Stark

But how?

The Most Important Rule

Be Silly. The goal is to laugh not to have a normal adventure. Someone wants to go to the moon? Fuck yeah they do and we're going to do it with medieval technology.

Set Up

Give the players a home base, a year they want to play in, and some general ownership of the setup. It's more successful when everyone has helped create the world because when a player makes suggestions it's easier to integrate them without feeling too precious. It helps to have a figurehead that assigns the quest to authoritatively start.

Characters

90% of creating a character here is a funny voice you're forced to talk in for 3 hours. I typically have people pick one trait they want to be good at and give them a slight advantage when using that - and the same for a negative trait. Don't overcomplicate it. They wanna be a skateboarder who can't feel love? perfect. +2 to cool & -2 to social acceptance.

Rolling

This can be whatever you want but as a general rule I use d20's as a graded scale. Sometimes, I craft the roll to mimic the action i.e. if they are walking a tight rope then might need to roll a 10 because 20 & 1 make them fall to one side or the other. Rolling in D&D got boring so make it fun again.

Dungeon Master

Your goal is to say 'Yes and...' but realistically it's 'Yes and roll to see if you can actually do that triple backflip down the cliff to mount the attacking phoenix...' - It's okay to make them fail, just don't tell them no. This guide is to help you be 1 step ahead of the players but it can't know the vibe of the room, have some empathy and play to the crowd.

Ending

No one can tell you this. The guide is to help you get 1/3 of the adventure set up and the rest will be created by the adventuring party. Have fun with it and try to tie up some loose ends at the end (or don't and bring them back for another adventure).