The Director Welcomes You

The Triumphantly Encrusted Agent

#cb5210

Location

Cloudy, Overcast Azerbaijan

Time of Day

14:15

Extraction Point

55 Miles S

Time to Complete

24 Hours

Eyeballs,
This week should be easy. You are delivering a Canopy Bed made of heavy metal. Get to Azerbaijan at 21:04

Good Luck.

— The Microsoft Zune you were holding self destructs.

The Villain Dossier

Name

Cecilia Wright

Alias

"Chunky Opossums"

Features

4' 4"

Brown eyes

Stretch Marks / Right thumb

Organization

The Board of Empty Mommy

Emotions

Rejected

Personality

Triumphantly Blue

Motive

Disrupt the military because of grief and loss

Bodyguard

Tim the "Huge Hydra"

Physical Size

Limited

Story

Additional Locations

The Encrusted Sanctuary

Expensive Reef

Ruin Acropolis

Random Events

Toilet arrives in the mail

Pickpocket Glistens gently

Whore chase a suspect

Building Salutes the adventurers

World

Stores

Jeremiah's Canopy Bed Threads

Jennings's Ring Emporium

Swanson's Spare brick Threads

Robertson's Faberge Egg Technologies

Traps

Arrow

Reverse Gravity of Endownment

Objects

Canopy Bed made of heavy metal

Spare brick that is glowing

Secret Ring

Hidden Bottle

Longsword of Endownment

Wand of Wonder

The ground now at target’s feet hurls him 1d4 miles away

People

Name Codename Career Likes Dislikes
Beau Jennings "King Tongues" Merchant Scarves Football
Xavier Swanson "Cramped Lox" Mole Snowglobes Comic Books
Jesse Le Actor Notes Soccer
Jeremiah Mendez Tailor Video Games Attention
Josephine Robertson Optimistic Candles Drinking

Cipher



                

                
 
                

                

                

                

                

                

The Fuck Is This?

After years of playing Dungeons & Dragons, I decided to make a variation where everything is improv. The DM knows as much as the players and you tell a story together - sitcom style. We use this site as a quest starter, think of some characters, and see how much we can make each other laugh.

It's designed to be simple, portable, and dependent on being creative & inventive. I wanted a framework to guide the plot forward but let us find the story. This page is just a guide to help the stories become too redundant - take as much as you want, ignore as much as you need. If you want to follow along with our adventures or read some examples, check out my personal story notes.

This concept and site was crafted by Andrew Maruska with linguistic help from Evan Stark

But how?

The Most Important Rule

Be Silly. The goal is to laugh not to have a normal adventure. Someone wants to go to the moon? Fuck yeah they do and we're going to do it with medieval technology.

Set Up

Give the players a home base, a year they want to play in, and some general ownership of the setup. It's more successful when everyone has helped create the world because when a player makes suggestions it's easier to integrate them without feeling too precious. It helps to have a figurehead that assigns the quest to authoritatively start.

Characters

90% of creating a character here is a funny voice you're forced to talk in for 3 hours. I typically have people pick one trait they want to be good at and give them a slight advantage when using that - and the same for a negative trait. Don't overcomplicate it. They wanna be a skateboarder who can't feel love? perfect. +2 to cool & -2 to social acceptance.

Rolling

This can be whatever you want but as a general rule I use d20's as a graded scale. Sometimes, I craft the roll to mimic the action i.e. if they are walking a tight rope then might need to roll a 10 because 20 & 1 make them fall to one side or the other. Rolling in D&D got boring so make it fun again.

Dungeon Master

Your goal is to say 'Yes and...' but realistically it's 'Yes and roll to see if you can actually do that triple backflip down the cliff to mount the attacking phoenix...' - It's okay to make them fail, just don't tell them no. This guide is to help you be 1 step ahead of the players but it can't know the vibe of the room, have some empathy and play to the crowd.

Ending

No one can tell you this. The guide is to help you get 1/3 of the adventure set up and the rest will be created by the adventuring party. Have fun with it and try to tie up some loose ends at the end (or don't and bring them back for another adventure).