The Director Welcomes You
The Brothel Bitterness Protocol
#390f31
Examiners, As you can see you are trapped inside descend into Underwater Water Park . We almost couldn't find you — Please explain when you get back. All we know is "All Elephants" is responsible and they sent us this message - "An object nearby starts bleeding at the Fallen King". Your mission was black ops, achieve what you can.
Hopefully you still have that Mechanical Bible hidden on you.
— The iPod you were holding self destructs.
Fiona Wheeler
"All Elephants"
7' 4"
Heterochromia eyes
Large moles / Left hand
The Society of Depressed Yeast
Relieved
Actually Contemporary
Disrupt the military to lust for power
Tony the "Mossy Hydra"
Meager
The Cerulean Peninsula
Overpopulated Jungle
Fragility Lake
Gunshot Integrates silently into the group
Wedding Cake screams at the top of their lungs
Cauldron Ignites violently
Chunk of Beef Integrates silently into the group
Isaiah's Iron stove Technologies
Doyle's Stool Labs
Leonard's Stool Threads
Salinas's crutch Mall
Wall Blade
Flooded Corridor of Bitterness
Iron stove that is glowing
Stool made of heavy metal
Secret Stool
Hidden Frying Pan
Knife of Bitterness
Target’s left arm has Strength 18/00
| Name | Codename | Career | Likes | Dislikes |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| Callie Doyle | "Blue Bones" | Merchant | Plushies | Cousins |
| Alex Leonard | "Fat Bones" | Mole | Children's Stories | Flashlights |
| Samuel Blair | Exhausted | Television | Mirrors | |
| Isaiah Perry | Butcher | Sharp Things | Trees | |
| Micah Salinas | Surgeon | Christmas | Attention |
After years of playing Dungeons & Dragons, I decided to make a variation where everything is improv. The DM knows as much as the players and you tell a story together - sitcom style. We use this site as a quest starter, think of some characters, and see how much we can make each other laugh.
It's designed to be simple, portable, and dependent on being creative & inventive. I wanted a framework to guide the plot forward but let us find the story. This page is just a guide to help the stories become too redundant - take as much as you want, ignore as much as you need. If you want to follow along with our adventures or read some examples, check out my personal story notes.
This concept and site was crafted by Andrew Maruska with linguistic help from Evan Stark
Be Silly. The goal is to laugh not to have a normal adventure. Someone wants to go to the moon? Fuck yeah they do and we're going to do it with medieval technology.
Set UpGive the players a home base, a year they want to play in, and some general ownership of the setup. It's more successful when everyone has helped create the world because when a player makes suggestions it's easier to integrate them without feeling too precious. It helps to have a figurehead that assigns the quest to authoritatively start.
Characters90% of creating a character here is a funny voice you're forced to talk in for 3 hours. I typically have people pick one trait they want to be good at and give them a slight advantage when using that - and the same for a negative trait. Don't overcomplicate it. They wanna be a skateboarder who can't feel love? perfect. +2 to cool & -2 to social acceptance.
RollingThis can be whatever you want but as a general rule I use d20's as a graded scale. Sometimes, I craft the roll to mimic the action i.e. if they are walking a tight rope then might need to roll a 10 because 20 & 1 make them fall to one side or the other. Rolling in D&D got boring so make it fun again.
Dungeon MasterYour goal is to say 'Yes and...' but realistically it's 'Yes and roll to see if you can actually do that triple backflip down the cliff to mount the attacking phoenix...' - It's okay to make them fail, just don't tell them no. This guide is to help you be 1 step ahead of the players but it can't know the vibe of the room, have some empathy and play to the crowd.
EndingNo one can tell you this. The guide is to help you get 1/3 of the adventure set up and the rest will be created by the adventuring party. Have fun with it and try to tie up some loose ends at the end (or don't and bring them back for another adventure).