The Director Welcomes You

The Questioningly Uninterested Agent

#741704

Location

Calm, Breezy Singapore

Time of Day

22:43

Extraction Point

144 Miles SE

Time to Complete

26 Hours

Undercover Emissaries,
As you can see you are trapped inside underneathe a Abandoned Forge . We almost couldn't find you — Please explain when you get back. All we know is "Gross Mongoose" is responsible and they sent us this message - "An out of place door appears at the Turtle Rock". Your mission was clandestine, achieve what you can.

Hopefully you still have that Dull Watch hidden on you.

— The CD player you were holding self destructs.

The Villain Dossier

Name

Carson Jones

Alias

"Gross Mongoose"

Features

4' 4"

Amber eyes

Large deep scar / Left thumb

Organization

The Authority of Unsightly Religion

Emotions

Brave

Personality

Questioningly Pernicious

Motive

Disrupt the military justice for a wrong-doing

Bodyguard

David the "Shitty Kangaroos"

Physical Size

Trifling

Story

Additional Locations

The Uninterested Jungle

Ancient Tower

Obliteration Acropolis

Random Events

Carcass scurries by

Sewer is loose

Spectator Skips merrily

Bard Is being detained

World

Stores

Lilly's Sconce Atelier

Stephens's Staircase International

Sandoval's Shirt Solutions

Romero's Toolset Consulting

Traps

Phantasmal Killer

Flooding Room of Calming

Objects

Sconce with a False bottom

Shirt that has been hollowed out

Secret Staircase

Hidden File

Medallion of Calming

Wand of Wonder

Next weapon to wound target was forged on a distant world

People

Name Codename Career Likes Dislikes
Laila Stephens "Two Parmigianas" Merchant Pillows Eggs
Rachel Sandoval "Green Bagels" Mole Coffee Sticks
Amir Mills Master Distiller Sun Glasses Ice Cubes
Lilly Walker Engineer Tigers Soccer
Genevieve Romero Midwife Washing Machines Cartography

Cipher



                

                
 
                

                

                

                

                

                

The Fuck Is This?

After years of playing Dungeons & Dragons, I decided to make a variation where everything is improv. The DM knows as much as the players and you tell a story together - sitcom style. We use this site as a quest starter, think of some characters, and see how much we can make each other laugh.

It's designed to be simple, portable, and dependent on being creative & inventive. I wanted a framework to guide the plot forward but let us find the story. This page is just a guide to help the stories become too redundant - take as much as you want, ignore as much as you need. If you want to follow along with our adventures or read some examples, check out my personal story notes.

This concept and site was crafted by Andrew Maruska with linguistic help from Evan Stark

But how?

The Most Important Rule

Be Silly. The goal is to laugh not to have a normal adventure. Someone wants to go to the moon? Fuck yeah they do and we're going to do it with medieval technology.

Set Up

Give the players a home base, a year they want to play in, and some general ownership of the setup. It's more successful when everyone has helped create the world because when a player makes suggestions it's easier to integrate them without feeling too precious. It helps to have a figurehead that assigns the quest to authoritatively start.

Characters

90% of creating a character here is a funny voice you're forced to talk in for 3 hours. I typically have people pick one trait they want to be good at and give them a slight advantage when using that - and the same for a negative trait. Don't overcomplicate it. They wanna be a skateboarder who can't feel love? perfect. +2 to cool & -2 to social acceptance.

Rolling

This can be whatever you want but as a general rule I use d20's as a graded scale. Sometimes, I craft the roll to mimic the action i.e. if they are walking a tight rope then might need to roll a 10 because 20 & 1 make them fall to one side or the other. Rolling in D&D got boring so make it fun again.

Dungeon Master

Your goal is to say 'Yes and...' but realistically it's 'Yes and roll to see if you can actually do that triple backflip down the cliff to mount the attacking phoenix...' - It's okay to make them fail, just don't tell them no. This guide is to help you be 1 step ahead of the players but it can't know the vibe of the room, have some empathy and play to the crowd.

Ending

No one can tell you this. The guide is to help you get 1/3 of the adventure set up and the rest will be created by the adventuring party. Have fun with it and try to tie up some loose ends at the end (or don't and bring them back for another adventure).