The Director Welcomes You

Operation — Tinkling Lace

#4be5ed

Location

Miserable, Dry Venezuela

Time of Day

9:40

Extraction Point

64 Miles E

Time to Complete

27 Hours

Snoopers,
We need your help. Agent Isabella Medina has gone missing and we believe "Italian Beholder" is responsible. They were last seen in Venezuela at 10:14. The agent sent one final message – "The group finds a random cow at the Screaming Waterfall". Take this Bulbous Can Opener - it was their favorite tool and might help you.

— The Origami Swan you were holding self destructs.

The Villain Dossier

Name

Calvin Gibbs

Alias

"Italian Beholder"

Features

6' 4"

Gray eyes

Small mole / Left middle finger

Organization

The Unit of Rotten Honey

Emotions

Melancholy

Personality

Smoothly Stoned

Motive

Make a lot of money for revenge

Bodyguard

Oscar the "Tender Wendigo"

Physical Size

Great

Story

Additional Locations

The Tinkling Shelter

Archaic Park

Freshness Castle

Random Events

Meteor Lunges at the group

Bottle of Soy Sauce is loose

Demon Is getting confiscated

Safe Skips merrily

World

Stores

Aurora's File Consulting

Powers's Butter Churner Technologies

Bowers's Creeping Vines Threads

Medina's Pocket watch Closet

Traps

Fire

Phantasmal Killer of Rage

Objects

File that has been hollowed out

Creeping Vines that is glowing

Secret Butter Churner

Hidden Spoon

Dagger of Rage

Wand of Wonder

Anyone nearby when target is wounded must Save or pass out

People

Name Codename Career Likes Dislikes
Emmanuel Powers "Two Brains" Merchant Cartography Lamps
Owen Bowers "Five Matzo Balls" Mole Video Games Coffee
Rhett Sullivan Geologist Attention Slippers
Aurora Park Cheerful Hammers Lipstick
Isabella Medina Paramedic Lipstick Soup

Cipher



                

                
 
                

                

                

                

                

                

The Fuck Is This?

After years of playing Dungeons & Dragons, I decided to make a variation where everything is improv. The DM knows as much as the players and you tell a story together - sitcom style. We use this site as a quest starter, think of some characters, and see how much we can make each other laugh.

It's designed to be simple, portable, and dependent on being creative & inventive. I wanted a framework to guide the plot forward but let us find the story. This page is just a guide to help the stories become too redundant - take as much as you want, ignore as much as you need. If you want to follow along with our adventures or read some examples, check out my personal story notes.

This concept and site was crafted by Andrew Maruska with linguistic help from Evan Stark

But how?

The Most Important Rule

Be Silly. The goal is to laugh not to have a normal adventure. Someone wants to go to the moon? Fuck yeah they do and we're going to do it with medieval technology.

Set Up

Give the players a home base, a year they want to play in, and some general ownership of the setup. It's more successful when everyone has helped create the world because when a player makes suggestions it's easier to integrate them without feeling too precious. It helps to have a figurehead that assigns the quest to authoritatively start.

Characters

90% of creating a character here is a funny voice you're forced to talk in for 3 hours. I typically have people pick one trait they want to be good at and give them a slight advantage when using that - and the same for a negative trait. Don't overcomplicate it. They wanna be a skateboarder who can't feel love? perfect. +2 to cool & -2 to social acceptance.

Rolling

This can be whatever you want but as a general rule I use d20's as a graded scale. Sometimes, I craft the roll to mimic the action i.e. if they are walking a tight rope then might need to roll a 10 because 20 & 1 make them fall to one side or the other. Rolling in D&D got boring so make it fun again.

Dungeon Master

Your goal is to say 'Yes and...' but realistically it's 'Yes and roll to see if you can actually do that triple backflip down the cliff to mount the attacking phoenix...' - It's okay to make them fail, just don't tell them no. This guide is to help you be 1 step ahead of the players but it can't know the vibe of the room, have some empathy and play to the crowd.

Ending

No one can tell you this. The guide is to help you get 1/3 of the adventure set up and the rest will be created by the adventuring party. Have fun with it and try to tie up some loose ends at the end (or don't and bring them back for another adventure).