The Director Welcomes You

Wardrobe Royale

#0ae47f

Location

Breezy, Icy Greece

Time of Day

20:30

Extraction Point

82 Miles NWW

Time to Complete

33 Hours

Meddlers,
As you can see you are trapped inside the bottom of a Crowded Barn Dance . We almost couldn't find you — Please explain when you get back. All we know is "Wild Cyclops" is responsible and they sent us this message - "A traveling merchant appears at the old bridge". Your mission was counterintelligence, achieve what you can.

Hopefully you still have that Bulbous Condom hidden on you.

— The Messenger Pigeon you were holding self destructs.

The Villain Dossier

Name

Miles Wolf

Alias

"Wild Cyclops"

Features

5' 11"

Blue eyes

Large deep scar / Left hand

Organization

The Alliance of Attractive Theory

Emotions

Hesitant

Personality

Fondly Chilly

Motive

Disrupt the military to become the best

Bodyguard

Ralphie the "Wooden Mutants"

Physical Size

Baby

Story

Additional Locations

The Sparkling Creek

Abandoned Lodge

Animosity Maze

Random Events

Renaissance Faire Adopts a nearby child

Dracula Calls menacingly

Biscuit Is accused by the law

Bag of Flour Integrates silently into the group

World

Stores

Jesus's Metal chair Wardrobe

Brewer's Doorway Creative

Keller's Crock Labs

Hart's Mirror Outlet

Traps

Chain Lightning

Ghoul Touch of Purity

Objects

Metal chair that has been hollowed out

Crock made of heavy metal

Secret Doorway

Hidden Sword

Notebook of Purity

Wand of Wonder

All shields within 50 yards are fragile like glass for 1d4 rounds

People

Name Codename Career Likes Dislikes
Isabelle Brewer "Yellow Eyes" Merchant Houses Cellphones
Jacob Keller "Orange Parmigianas" Mole Chocolate Books
Isaiah Phillips Vision Bracelets Chalk
Jesus Leonard Angry Balloons Cooking
Grayson Hart Dentist Rock n' Roll Plushies

Cipher



                

                
 
                

                

                

                

                

                

The Fuck Is This?

After years of playing Dungeons & Dragons, I decided to make a variation where everything is improv. The DM knows as much as the players and you tell a story together - sitcom style. We use this site as a quest starter, think of some characters, and see how much we can make each other laugh.

It's designed to be simple, portable, and dependent on being creative & inventive. I wanted a framework to guide the plot forward but let us find the story. This page is just a guide to help the stories become too redundant - take as much as you want, ignore as much as you need. If you want to follow along with our adventures or read some examples, check out my personal story notes.

This concept and site was crafted by Andrew Maruska with linguistic help from Evan Stark

But how?

The Most Important Rule

Be Silly. The goal is to laugh not to have a normal adventure. Someone wants to go to the moon? Fuck yeah they do and we're going to do it with medieval technology.

Set Up

Give the players a home base, a year they want to play in, and some general ownership of the setup. It's more successful when everyone has helped create the world because when a player makes suggestions it's easier to integrate them without feeling too precious. It helps to have a figurehead that assigns the quest to authoritatively start.

Characters

90% of creating a character here is a funny voice you're forced to talk in for 3 hours. I typically have people pick one trait they want to be good at and give them a slight advantage when using that - and the same for a negative trait. Don't overcomplicate it. They wanna be a skateboarder who can't feel love? perfect. +2 to cool & -2 to social acceptance.

Rolling

This can be whatever you want but as a general rule I use d20's as a graded scale. Sometimes, I craft the roll to mimic the action i.e. if they are walking a tight rope then might need to roll a 10 because 20 & 1 make them fall to one side or the other. Rolling in D&D got boring so make it fun again.

Dungeon Master

Your goal is to say 'Yes and...' but realistically it's 'Yes and roll to see if you can actually do that triple backflip down the cliff to mount the attacking phoenix...' - It's okay to make them fail, just don't tell them no. This guide is to help you be 1 step ahead of the players but it can't know the vibe of the room, have some empathy and play to the crowd.

Ending

No one can tell you this. The guide is to help you get 1/3 of the adventure set up and the rest will be created by the adventuring party. Have fun with it and try to tie up some loose ends at the end (or don't and bring them back for another adventure).