The Director Welcomes You

Who is Charles Boundary?

#40d829

Location

Miserable, Windless Honduras

Time of Day

9:35

Extraction Point

37 Miles NEE

Time to Complete

15 Hours

Sleuths,
I have sent you to circle a Abandoned Mansion to look for a suspect by the name "Stiff Vampires". This mission is anti-surveillance. Their recent activity is concerning and we need you to discover their location. We don't know much about their goals but we've intercepted this cryptic message – "A vagrant asks for food at the giants footsteps".

We're low budget this mission – I've packed a Feminine Level in your kit to help.

— The Tablet of Stone you were holding self destructs.

The Villain Dossier

Name

Robert Cannon

Alias

"Stiff Vampires"

Features

7' 10"

Heterochromia eyes

Large deep scar / Left eye

Organization

The Board of Short Catamaran

Emotions

Safe

Personality

Frankly Shrilling

Motive

Take over a government for sibling rivalry

Bodyguard

Charles the "Recessive Griffin"

Physical Size

Lanky

Story

Additional Locations

The Cheap Jungle

Polluted Business

Doom Manor

Random Events

Vagabond is robbed

Donkey scurries by

Soup Is throwing a BBQ

Biscuit Finds gold in the water

World

Stores

Dominic's Letter Opener Convenience store

Fields's Fire poker set Bureau

Chang's Oil Lamp Worldwide

Vaughn's Vanity Cosmetics

Traps

Insanity Mist Vapor

Fusillade of Darts of Well-being

Objects

Letter Opener that is glowing

Oil Lamp that has been hollowed out

Secret Fire poker set

Hidden Club

Spear of Well-being

Wand of Wonder

Caster’s spellbook can dispense 1d4 gallons of pure water per day

People

Name Codename Career Likes Dislikes
August Fields "Little Pretzels" Merchant Houses Trees
Amir Chang "No Noses" Mole Death Limes
Charlie Phillips Bounty hunter Easter Jigsaw Puzzles
Dominic Holt Cleaner Comic Books Lions
Bennett Vaughn Dead Tired Glitter Ice Cubes

Cipher



                

                
 
                

                

                

                

                

                

The Fuck Is This?

After years of playing Dungeons & Dragons, I decided to make a variation where everything is improv. The DM knows as much as the players and you tell a story together - sitcom style. We use this site as a quest starter, think of some characters, and see how much we can make each other laugh.

It's designed to be simple, portable, and dependent on being creative & inventive. I wanted a framework to guide the plot forward but let us find the story. This page is just a guide to help the stories become too redundant - take as much as you want, ignore as much as you need. If you want to follow along with our adventures or read some examples, check out my personal story notes.

This concept and site was crafted by Andrew Maruska with linguistic help from Evan Stark

But how?

The Most Important Rule

Be Silly. The goal is to laugh not to have a normal adventure. Someone wants to go to the moon? Fuck yeah they do and we're going to do it with medieval technology.

Set Up

Give the players a home base, a year they want to play in, and some general ownership of the setup. It's more successful when everyone has helped create the world because when a player makes suggestions it's easier to integrate them without feeling too precious. It helps to have a figurehead that assigns the quest to authoritatively start.

Characters

90% of creating a character here is a funny voice you're forced to talk in for 3 hours. I typically have people pick one trait they want to be good at and give them a slight advantage when using that - and the same for a negative trait. Don't overcomplicate it. They wanna be a skateboarder who can't feel love? perfect. +2 to cool & -2 to social acceptance.

Rolling

This can be whatever you want but as a general rule I use d20's as a graded scale. Sometimes, I craft the roll to mimic the action i.e. if they are walking a tight rope then might need to roll a 10 because 20 & 1 make them fall to one side or the other. Rolling in D&D got boring so make it fun again.

Dungeon Master

Your goal is to say 'Yes and...' but realistically it's 'Yes and roll to see if you can actually do that triple backflip down the cliff to mount the attacking phoenix...' - It's okay to make them fail, just don't tell them no. This guide is to help you be 1 step ahead of the players but it can't know the vibe of the room, have some empathy and play to the crowd.

Ending

No one can tell you this. The guide is to help you get 1/3 of the adventure set up and the rest will be created by the adventuring party. Have fun with it and try to tie up some loose ends at the end (or don't and bring them back for another adventure).