The Director Welcomes You
The Cherries Perspiration Protocol
#5010dd
Sleuths, It seems "Cramped Alien" has gone level 2. They have been broadcasting this message "The group finds a dead fish at the Ghost Town". We need you to eliminate them, Reproachfully. Their last known location was recorded at 24:23. You have a Soft Ashtray as a last resort. Use carefully.
— The Microsoft Zune you were holding self destructs.
Paisley Barnett
"Cramped Alien"
4' 2"
Green eyes
Stretch Marks / Right thumb
The Alliance of Freezing Literature
Afraid
Reproachfully Damp
Take over a country for a love interest
Oscar the "White Demon"
Microscopic
The Hollow Lodge
Crowded Tower
Contentment Forge
Deadbeat Glistens gently
Gallon of Trash chase a suspect
Fairy grabs a lady's purse
Alligator stop the party and asks questions
Abel's Hanging Birdcage Chic Chåteau
Hawkins's Bench Warehouse
Mendoza's Spice shelf Market
Gallagher's Music Box Discount
Bear Trap
Poisoned Arrow of Perspiration
Hanging Birdcage with a False bottom
Spice shelf children's replica
Secret Bench
Hidden Diary
Nipple Clamp of Perspiration
Target dares 1d4 of his allies to try to behead him
| Name | Codename | Career | Likes | Dislikes |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| Claire Hawkins | "Heavy Legs" | Merchant | Chickens | Sharp Things |
| Ariel Mendoza | "Slow Thumbs" | Mole | Trucks | Basketball |
| Isaac Soto | Exhausted | Cats | Trees | |
| Abel Reed | Talent agent | Painting | Houses | |
| Weston Gallagher | Ghost | Tigers | Soccer |
After years of playing Dungeons & Dragons, I decided to make a variation where everything is improv. The DM knows as much as the players and you tell a story together - sitcom style. We use this site as a quest starter, think of some characters, and see how much we can make each other laugh.
It's designed to be simple, portable, and dependent on being creative & inventive. I wanted a framework to guide the plot forward but let us find the story. This page is just a guide to help the stories become too redundant - take as much as you want, ignore as much as you need. If you want to follow along with our adventures or read some examples, check out my personal story notes.
This concept and site was crafted by Andrew Maruska with linguistic help from Evan Stark
Be Silly. The goal is to laugh not to have a normal adventure. Someone wants to go to the moon? Fuck yeah they do and we're going to do it with medieval technology.
Set UpGive the players a home base, a year they want to play in, and some general ownership of the setup. It's more successful when everyone has helped create the world because when a player makes suggestions it's easier to integrate them without feeling too precious. It helps to have a figurehead that assigns the quest to authoritatively start.
Characters90% of creating a character here is a funny voice you're forced to talk in for 3 hours. I typically have people pick one trait they want to be good at and give them a slight advantage when using that - and the same for a negative trait. Don't overcomplicate it. They wanna be a skateboarder who can't feel love? perfect. +2 to cool & -2 to social acceptance.
RollingThis can be whatever you want but as a general rule I use d20's as a graded scale. Sometimes, I craft the roll to mimic the action i.e. if they are walking a tight rope then might need to roll a 10 because 20 & 1 make them fall to one side or the other. Rolling in D&D got boring so make it fun again.
Dungeon MasterYour goal is to say 'Yes and...' but realistically it's 'Yes and roll to see if you can actually do that triple backflip down the cliff to mount the attacking phoenix...' - It's okay to make them fail, just don't tell them no. This guide is to help you be 1 step ahead of the players but it can't know the vibe of the room, have some empathy and play to the crowd.
EndingNo one can tell you this. The guide is to help you get 1/3 of the adventure set up and the rest will be created by the adventuring party. Have fun with it and try to tie up some loose ends at the end (or don't and bring them back for another adventure).