The Director Welcomes You

The Hourly Better Agent

#733411

Location

Dry, Miserable Gabon

Time of Day

5:42

Extraction Point

186 Miles W

Time to Complete

25 Hours

Detectives,
As you can see you are trapped inside approach a Overpopulated Masquerade . We almost couldn't find you — Please explain when you get back. All we know is "Two Troll" is responsible and they sent us this message - "A roll of thunder at the Skull shaped island". Your mission was anti-surveillance, achieve what you can.

Hopefully you still have that Feminine Lighter hidden on you.

— The Microsoft Zune you were holding self destructs.

The Villain Dossier

Name

Isla French

Alias

"Two Troll"

Features

5' 5"

Hazel eyes

Large deep scar / Right leg

Organization

The company of Silly Polarbear

Emotions

Tender

Personality

Hourly Slimy

Motive

Disrupt the military to corrupt everyone

Bodyguard

Emily the "Childish Basilisk"

Physical Size

Substantial

Story

Additional Locations

The Better Sanctuary

Polluted Mansion

Pleasure Jungle

Random Events

Bard is being loudly arrested

Water Vessel explodes

Druid Ignites violently

Fairy catches on fire

World

Stores

Mckenzie's Plaster Bust Beauty Stop

Park's Loveseat International

Stevenson's Doorway Supermarket

Tate's Grandfather Clock Collective

Traps

Bricks from Ceiling

Burning Hands of Cleanliness

Objects

Plaster Bust made of heavy metal

Doorway children's replica

Secret Loveseat

Hidden Bottle

Book of Cleanliness

Wand of Wonder

Whenever caster casts a spell, someone far away vows to kill him

People

Name Codename Career Likes Dislikes
Timothy Park "Short Brains" Merchant Soda Cooking
Kaleb Stevenson "Bullet Knuckles" Mole Chalk Toilets
Evelyn Carrillo Professional Cuddler Gym Memberships Easter
Mckenzie Potter Old Man Jazz Physics
Patrick Tate Secretary Tissues Hammers

Cipher



                

                
 
                

                

                

                

                

                

The Fuck Is This?

After years of playing Dungeons & Dragons, I decided to make a variation where everything is improv. The DM knows as much as the players and you tell a story together - sitcom style. We use this site as a quest starter, think of some characters, and see how much we can make each other laugh.

It's designed to be simple, portable, and dependent on being creative & inventive. I wanted a framework to guide the plot forward but let us find the story. This page is just a guide to help the stories become too redundant - take as much as you want, ignore as much as you need. If you want to follow along with our adventures or read some examples, check out my personal story notes.

This concept and site was crafted by Andrew Maruska with linguistic help from Evan Stark

But how?

The Most Important Rule

Be Silly. The goal is to laugh not to have a normal adventure. Someone wants to go to the moon? Fuck yeah they do and we're going to do it with medieval technology.

Set Up

Give the players a home base, a year they want to play in, and some general ownership of the setup. It's more successful when everyone has helped create the world because when a player makes suggestions it's easier to integrate them without feeling too precious. It helps to have a figurehead that assigns the quest to authoritatively start.

Characters

90% of creating a character here is a funny voice you're forced to talk in for 3 hours. I typically have people pick one trait they want to be good at and give them a slight advantage when using that - and the same for a negative trait. Don't overcomplicate it. They wanna be a skateboarder who can't feel love? perfect. +2 to cool & -2 to social acceptance.

Rolling

This can be whatever you want but as a general rule I use d20's as a graded scale. Sometimes, I craft the roll to mimic the action i.e. if they are walking a tight rope then might need to roll a 10 because 20 & 1 make them fall to one side or the other. Rolling in D&D got boring so make it fun again.

Dungeon Master

Your goal is to say 'Yes and...' but realistically it's 'Yes and roll to see if you can actually do that triple backflip down the cliff to mount the attacking phoenix...' - It's okay to make them fail, just don't tell them no. This guide is to help you be 1 step ahead of the players but it can't know the vibe of the room, have some empathy and play to the crowd.

Ending

No one can tell you this. The guide is to help you get 1/3 of the adventure set up and the rest will be created by the adventuring party. Have fun with it and try to tie up some loose ends at the end (or don't and bring them back for another adventure).