The Director Welcomes You

Who is Terry Theory?

#7de97e

Location

Miserable, Cloudy Norway

Time of Day

20:38

Extraction Point

99 Miles W

Time to Complete

39 Hours

Operatives,
As you can see you are trapped inside within a Bustling Missile Launch Site . We almost couldn't find you — Please explain when you get back. All we know is "Cheap Vampires" is responsible and they sent us this message - "The group finds a dead fish at the Hollow oak tree". Your mission was black ops, achieve what you can.

Hopefully you still have that Evil Barstool hidden on you.

— The Portable Radio you were holding self destructs.

The Villain Dossier

Name

Mia Garner

Alias

"Cheap Vampires"

Features

5' 3"

Gray eyes

Small mole / Left eye

Organization

The Guild of Weak Rate

Emotions

Exasperated

Personality

Mostly Stocky

Motive

Take over a country for sibling rivalry

Bodyguard

Terry the "Dirty Mongoose"

Physical Size

Tremendous

Story

Additional Locations

The Drab House

Abandoned Chateau

Euthanasia Peninsula

Random Events

Vegetable arrives in the mail

Alligator Attempts to rob a bank

Crow Salutes the adventurers

Dancer Is accused by the law

World

Stores

Kaiden's Musical instrument Brothers

Wood's Watch Discount

Walsh's Quill and Ink Bureau

Meyer's Bookcase Little shop

Traps

Bestow Curse

Crushing Room of Rage

Objects

Musical instrument made of heavy metal

Quill and Ink children's replica

Secret Watch

Hidden Mace

Crossbow of Rage

Wand of Wonder

Target gains benefit from food only if eaten while he’s naked

People

Name Codename Career Likes Dislikes
Kai Wood "Meaty Feet" Merchant Sailboats Attention
Hazel Walsh "Yellow Matzo Balls" Mole Toilets Rabbits
Sophie Stewart Bruised Robots Death
Kaiden Steele Teacher Cats Baseball
Xander Meyer Teacher Glass Houses

Cipher



                

                
 
                

                

                

                

                

                

The Fuck Is This?

After years of playing Dungeons & Dragons, I decided to make a variation where everything is improv. The DM knows as much as the players and you tell a story together - sitcom style. We use this site as a quest starter, think of some characters, and see how much we can make each other laugh.

It's designed to be simple, portable, and dependent on being creative & inventive. I wanted a framework to guide the plot forward but let us find the story. This page is just a guide to help the stories become too redundant - take as much as you want, ignore as much as you need. If you want to follow along with our adventures or read some examples, check out my personal story notes.

This concept and site was crafted by Andrew Maruska with linguistic help from Evan Stark

But how?

The Most Important Rule

Be Silly. The goal is to laugh not to have a normal adventure. Someone wants to go to the moon? Fuck yeah they do and we're going to do it with medieval technology.

Set Up

Give the players a home base, a year they want to play in, and some general ownership of the setup. It's more successful when everyone has helped create the world because when a player makes suggestions it's easier to integrate them without feeling too precious. It helps to have a figurehead that assigns the quest to authoritatively start.

Characters

90% of creating a character here is a funny voice you're forced to talk in for 3 hours. I typically have people pick one trait they want to be good at and give them a slight advantage when using that - and the same for a negative trait. Don't overcomplicate it. They wanna be a skateboarder who can't feel love? perfect. +2 to cool & -2 to social acceptance.

Rolling

This can be whatever you want but as a general rule I use d20's as a graded scale. Sometimes, I craft the roll to mimic the action i.e. if they are walking a tight rope then might need to roll a 10 because 20 & 1 make them fall to one side or the other. Rolling in D&D got boring so make it fun again.

Dungeon Master

Your goal is to say 'Yes and...' but realistically it's 'Yes and roll to see if you can actually do that triple backflip down the cliff to mount the attacking phoenix...' - It's okay to make them fail, just don't tell them no. This guide is to help you be 1 step ahead of the players but it can't know the vibe of the room, have some empathy and play to the crowd.

Ending

No one can tell you this. The guide is to help you get 1/3 of the adventure set up and the rest will be created by the adventuring party. Have fun with it and try to tie up some loose ends at the end (or don't and bring them back for another adventure).