The Director Welcomes You

Operation — Limited Software

#22136b

Location

Overcast, Overcast Iraq

Time of Day

14:41

Extraction Point

193 Miles SEE

Time to Complete

17 Hours

Informants,
We need your help. Agent Ryleigh Christensen has gone missing and we believe "Dull Banshee" is responsible. They were last seen in Iraq at 17:18. The agent sent one final message – "Clouds develop quickly at the Great Shadow". Take this Beautiful Condom - it was their favorite tool and might help you.

— The Burner Phone you were holding self destructs.

The Villain Dossier

Name

Camden Simpson

Alias

"Dull Banshee"

Features

7' 5"

Brown eyes

Small mole / Left foot

Organization

The Alliance of Nervous Fetish

Emotions

Cautious

Personality

Fervently Heavy

Motive

Make a lot of money to lead a mutiny

Bodyguard

Harrison the "Encrusted Goblins"

Physical Size

Tremendous

Story

Additional Locations

The Limited Circus

Touristy Lodge

Fatality Reef

Random Events

Lactose Intolerance Adopts a nearby child

Dozen Eggs gathers near a point of interest

Panhandler Bounces oddly

Pine Branch stop the party and asks questions

World

Stores

Genesis's Cutting board Emporium

Douglas's Pair of Statues Threads

Mann's Oil Lamp Market

Christensen's Doorway Boutique

Traps

Blade Barrier

Bricks from Ceiling of Dark

Objects

Cutting board children's replica

Oil Lamp with a False bottom

Secret Pair of Statues

Hidden Brass Knuckles

Camera of Dark

Wand of Wonder

Caster thinks that he’s invulnerable while he’s invisible

People

Name Codename Career Likes Dislikes
Peyton Douglas "Short Forearms" Merchant Fire Socks
Sebastian Mann "Orange Legs" Mole Rubber Stamps Soda
Sadie Mejia Accountant Tea Candy
Genesis Lang Dentist Cooking Easter
Ryleigh Christensen Cheerful Easter Washing Machines

Cipher



                


                

                    
                    

                


                

                    
                    
 
                


                

                    
                    

                


                

                    
                    

                


                

                    
                    

                

                
                

                    
                    

                


                

                    
                    

                

              

            

          

        

      

    



    
      
      
 
        

          

            
The Fuck Is This?

          

          

            
            
After years of playing Dungeons & Dragons, I decided to make a variation where everything is improv. The DM knows as much as the players and you tell a story together - sitcom style. We use this site as a quest starter, think of some characters, and see how much we can make each other laugh.

            
            
It's designed to be simple, portable, and dependent on being creative & inventive. I wanted a framework to guide the plot forward but let us find the story. This page is just a guide to help the stories become too redundant - take as much as you want, ignore as much as you need. If you want to follow along with our adventures or read some examples, check out  my personal story notes.

            
            
This concept and site was crafted by Andrew Maruska with linguistic help from Evan Stark

          

        

      

    


    
      
      
 
        

          

            
But how?

          

          
            
            The Most Important Rule
            
Be Silly. The goal is to laugh not to have a normal adventure. Someone wants to go to the moon? Fuck yeah they do and we're going to do it with medieval technology.

            
            Set Up
            
Give the players a home base, a year they want to play in, and some general ownership of the setup. It's more successful when everyone has helped create the world because when a player makes suggestions it's easier to integrate them without feeling too precious. It helps to have a figurehead that assigns the quest to authoritatively start.

            
            Characters
            
90% of creating a character here is a funny voice you're forced to talk in for 3 hours. I typically have people pick one trait they want to be good at and give them a slight advantage when using that - and the same for a negative trait. Don't overcomplicate it. They wanna be a skateboarder who can't feel love? perfect. +2 to cool & -2 to social acceptance. 

            
            Rolling
            
This can be whatever you want but as a general rule I use d20's as a graded scale. Sometimes, I craft the roll to mimic the action i.e. if they are walking a tight rope then might need to roll a 10 because 20 & 1 make them fall to one side or the other. Rolling in D&D got boring so make it fun again. 

            
            Dungeon Master
            
Your goal is to say 'Yes and...' but realistically it's 'Yes and roll to see if you can actually do that triple backflip down the cliff to mount the attacking phoenix...' - It's okay to make them fail, just don't tell them no. This guide is to help you be 1 step ahead of the players but it can't know the vibe of the room, have some empathy and play to the crowd. 

            
            Ending
            
No one can tell you this. The guide is to help you get 1/3 of the adventure set up and the rest will be created by the adventuring party. Have fun with it and try to tie up some loose ends at the end (or don't and bring them back for another adventure).