The Director Welcomes You

The Mechanically Rapping Agent

#fef571

Location

Dark, Dark Haiti

Time of Day

1:54

Extraction Point

82 Miles S

Time to Complete

48 Hours

Sleuths,
This week should be easy. You are delivering a Musical instrument children's replica. Get to Haiti at 10:00

Good Luck.

— The Tinder Date you were holding self destructs.

The Villain Dossier

Name

Hayden Moreno

Alias

"Italian Troll"

Features

7' 3"

Green eyes

Stretch Marks / Left middle finger

Organization

The League of Uneven Advertisement

Emotions

Disoriented

Personality

Mechanically Annoying

Motive

Disrupt the military for a love interest

Bodyguard

Larry the "Helpless Dolphin"

Physical Size

Considerable

Story

Additional Locations

The Rapping Lodge

Underwater Forge

Power Port

Random Events

VAT of Broth Adopts a nearby child

Wedding Cake is heard screaming

Wedding Cake Finds gold in the water

Dozen Eggs Is throwing a BBQ

World

Stores

Leo's Musical instrument Market

Manning's Cutting board Department store

Patton's Trophy Technologies

Miller's Crate Department store

Traps

Flame Strike

Box of Brown Mold of Excitement

Objects

Musical instrument children's replica

Trophy that is glowing

Secret Cutting board

Hidden Blades

Diary of Excitement

Wand of Wonder

Hundreds of wasps swarm the target whenever he draws a weapon

People

Name Codename Career Likes Dislikes
Everly Manning "Nice Boy" Merchant Rubber Bands Lipstick
Valeria Patton "Italian Fingers" Mole Children's Stories Football
Madeline Cook Professional Bridesmaid Water Video Games
Leo McCormick Weakened Soap Balloons
Charlie Miller Operator Jazz Houses

Cipher



                

                
 
                

                

                

                

                

                

The Fuck Is This?

After years of playing Dungeons & Dragons, I decided to make a variation where everything is improv. The DM knows as much as the players and you tell a story together - sitcom style. We use this site as a quest starter, think of some characters, and see how much we can make each other laugh.

It's designed to be simple, portable, and dependent on being creative & inventive. I wanted a framework to guide the plot forward but let us find the story. This page is just a guide to help the stories become too redundant - take as much as you want, ignore as much as you need. If you want to follow along with our adventures or read some examples, check out my personal story notes.

This concept and site was crafted by Andrew Maruska with linguistic help from Evan Stark

But how?

The Most Important Rule

Be Silly. The goal is to laugh not to have a normal adventure. Someone wants to go to the moon? Fuck yeah they do and we're going to do it with medieval technology.

Set Up

Give the players a home base, a year they want to play in, and some general ownership of the setup. It's more successful when everyone has helped create the world because when a player makes suggestions it's easier to integrate them without feeling too precious. It helps to have a figurehead that assigns the quest to authoritatively start.

Characters

90% of creating a character here is a funny voice you're forced to talk in for 3 hours. I typically have people pick one trait they want to be good at and give them a slight advantage when using that - and the same for a negative trait. Don't overcomplicate it. They wanna be a skateboarder who can't feel love? perfect. +2 to cool & -2 to social acceptance.

Rolling

This can be whatever you want but as a general rule I use d20's as a graded scale. Sometimes, I craft the roll to mimic the action i.e. if they are walking a tight rope then might need to roll a 10 because 20 & 1 make them fall to one side or the other. Rolling in D&D got boring so make it fun again.

Dungeon Master

Your goal is to say 'Yes and...' but realistically it's 'Yes and roll to see if you can actually do that triple backflip down the cliff to mount the attacking phoenix...' - It's okay to make them fail, just don't tell them no. This guide is to help you be 1 step ahead of the players but it can't know the vibe of the room, have some empathy and play to the crowd.

Ending

No one can tell you this. The guide is to help you get 1/3 of the adventure set up and the rest will be created by the adventuring party. Have fun with it and try to tie up some loose ends at the end (or don't and bring them back for another adventure).