The Director Welcomes You

The Arithmetic Animosity Incident

#f5f0f0

Location

Sunny, Mild Grenada

Time of Day

20:44

Extraction Point

84 Miles SW

Time to Complete

39 Hours

Meddlers,
This week should be easy. You are delivering a Fruit Bowl that has been hollowed out. Get to Grenada at 08:07

Good Luck.

— The Portable Radio you were holding self destructs.

The Villain Dossier

Name

Jeremy Johnson

Alias

"Chunky Succubus"

Features

6' 2"

Blue eyes

Large moles / Left eye

Organization

The Bureau of Hungry Ladybug

Emotions

Awkward

Personality

Rarely Early

Motive

Disrupt the military to lust for power

Bodyguard

Jimmy the "Damp ghost"

Physical Size

Full-grown

Story

Additional Locations

The Swollen Festival

Underwater Palace

Contentment Citadel

Random Events

Leopard Crashes slowly

Diary is being loudly arrested

Pickpocket Balances on a ledge

Box of Cigarette Attempts to rob a bank

World

Stores

Arianna's Fruit Bowl Warehouse

Holt's Chair Collective

Powers's Spare brick Closet

Casey's Lounge Chair Productions

Traps

Fusillade of Darts

Javelin of Animosity

Objects

Fruit Bowl that has been hollowed out

Spare brick children's replica

Secret Chair

Hidden Medallion

Rapier of Animosity

Wand of Wonder

Everyone who knows the target’s name fears him for 3d10 rounds

People

Name Codename Career Likes Dislikes
Gianna Holt "Casual Forearms" Merchant Trees Plushies
Cooper Powers "The Elbows" Mole Plushies Horses
Gabriella Ramirez Depressed Bells Sharp Things
Arianna Herrera Journalist Doves Trees
Jonah Casey Indifferent Drinking Tea

Cipher



                

                
 
                

                

                

                

                

                

The Fuck Is This?

After years of playing Dungeons & Dragons, I decided to make a variation where everything is improv. The DM knows as much as the players and you tell a story together - sitcom style. We use this site as a quest starter, think of some characters, and see how much we can make each other laugh.

It's designed to be simple, portable, and dependent on being creative & inventive. I wanted a framework to guide the plot forward but let us find the story. This page is just a guide to help the stories become too redundant - take as much as you want, ignore as much as you need. If you want to follow along with our adventures or read some examples, check out my personal story notes.

This concept and site was crafted by Andrew Maruska with linguistic help from Evan Stark

But how?

The Most Important Rule

Be Silly. The goal is to laugh not to have a normal adventure. Someone wants to go to the moon? Fuck yeah they do and we're going to do it with medieval technology.

Set Up

Give the players a home base, a year they want to play in, and some general ownership of the setup. It's more successful when everyone has helped create the world because when a player makes suggestions it's easier to integrate them without feeling too precious. It helps to have a figurehead that assigns the quest to authoritatively start.

Characters

90% of creating a character here is a funny voice you're forced to talk in for 3 hours. I typically have people pick one trait they want to be good at and give them a slight advantage when using that - and the same for a negative trait. Don't overcomplicate it. They wanna be a skateboarder who can't feel love? perfect. +2 to cool & -2 to social acceptance.

Rolling

This can be whatever you want but as a general rule I use d20's as a graded scale. Sometimes, I craft the roll to mimic the action i.e. if they are walking a tight rope then might need to roll a 10 because 20 & 1 make them fall to one side or the other. Rolling in D&D got boring so make it fun again.

Dungeon Master

Your goal is to say 'Yes and...' but realistically it's 'Yes and roll to see if you can actually do that triple backflip down the cliff to mount the attacking phoenix...' - It's okay to make them fail, just don't tell them no. This guide is to help you be 1 step ahead of the players but it can't know the vibe of the room, have some empathy and play to the crowd.

Ending

No one can tell you this. The guide is to help you get 1/3 of the adventure set up and the rest will be created by the adventuring party. Have fun with it and try to tie up some loose ends at the end (or don't and bring them back for another adventure).