The Director Welcomes You

Operation — Clacking Mohawk

#1e9214

Location

Balmy, Bright Eswatini

Time of Day

18:40

Extraction Point

54 Miles NW

Time to Complete

40 Hours

Undercover Emissaries,
This week should be easy. You are delivering a Globe with a False bottom. Get to Eswatini at 00:10

Good Luck.

— The Messenger Pigeon you were holding self destructs.

The Villain Dossier

Name

Chloe Daniels

Alias

"Indigo Leech"

Features

6' 6"

Heterochromia eyes

Stretch Marks / Neck

Organization

The Club of Quaint Buffet

Emotions

Bitter

Personality

Mortally Mealy

Motive

Take over a government because of a betrayal

Bodyguard

Frankie the "Pugilistic Hedgehogs"

Physical Size

Trifling

Story

Additional Locations

The Clacking Forest

Desolate Tower

Happiness Peninsula

Random Events

Bellhop Protests

Storm emerges

Skeleton Skips merrily

Buccaneer Balances on a ledge

World

Stores

Brooklyn's Globe Ventures

Hart's Mantle Warehouse

Bryant's crutch Labs

Mason's Figurine Couture

Traps

Collapsing Column

Chain Lightning of Well-being

Objects

Globe with a False bottom

crutch children's replica

Secret Mantle

Hidden Shield

Longsword of Well-being

Wand of Wonder

Any water now in contact with target’s body freezes solid

People

Name Codename Career Likes Dislikes
Eliza Hart "Mad Boy" Merchant Doves Essential Oils
Norah Bryant "Drowsy Falafels" Mole Lamps Comic Books
Mya Horton Acupuncturist Sharp Things Flowers
Brooklyn Miller Vision Soap Potatoes
Mary Mason Veteran Rock n' Roll Cats

Cipher



                

                
 
                

                

                

                

                

                

The Fuck Is This?

After years of playing Dungeons & Dragons, I decided to make a variation where everything is improv. The DM knows as much as the players and you tell a story together - sitcom style. We use this site as a quest starter, think of some characters, and see how much we can make each other laugh.

It's designed to be simple, portable, and dependent on being creative & inventive. I wanted a framework to guide the plot forward but let us find the story. This page is just a guide to help the stories become too redundant - take as much as you want, ignore as much as you need. If you want to follow along with our adventures or read some examples, check out my personal story notes.

This concept and site was crafted by Andrew Maruska with linguistic help from Evan Stark

But how?

The Most Important Rule

Be Silly. The goal is to laugh not to have a normal adventure. Someone wants to go to the moon? Fuck yeah they do and we're going to do it with medieval technology.

Set Up

Give the players a home base, a year they want to play in, and some general ownership of the setup. It's more successful when everyone has helped create the world because when a player makes suggestions it's easier to integrate them without feeling too precious. It helps to have a figurehead that assigns the quest to authoritatively start.

Characters

90% of creating a character here is a funny voice you're forced to talk in for 3 hours. I typically have people pick one trait they want to be good at and give them a slight advantage when using that - and the same for a negative trait. Don't overcomplicate it. They wanna be a skateboarder who can't feel love? perfect. +2 to cool & -2 to social acceptance.

Rolling

This can be whatever you want but as a general rule I use d20's as a graded scale. Sometimes, I craft the roll to mimic the action i.e. if they are walking a tight rope then might need to roll a 10 because 20 & 1 make them fall to one side or the other. Rolling in D&D got boring so make it fun again.

Dungeon Master

Your goal is to say 'Yes and...' but realistically it's 'Yes and roll to see if you can actually do that triple backflip down the cliff to mount the attacking phoenix...' - It's okay to make them fail, just don't tell them no. This guide is to help you be 1 step ahead of the players but it can't know the vibe of the room, have some empathy and play to the crowd.

Ending

No one can tell you this. The guide is to help you get 1/3 of the adventure set up and the rest will be created by the adventuring party. Have fun with it and try to tie up some loose ends at the end (or don't and bring them back for another adventure).