The Director Welcomes You

The Alcoholic Fire Incident

#97989d

Location

Icy, Icy Kyrgyzstan

Time of Day

10:22

Extraction Point

107 Miles NEE

Time to Complete

39 Hours

Spy Deputies,
I have sent you to the inside of a Hidden Lodge to look for a suspect by the name "Silver Koalas". This mission is anti-surveillance. Their recent activity is concerning and we need you to assassinate the target. We don't know much about their goals but we've intercepted this cryptic message – "A thick fog rolls in at the Ghost Town".

We're low budget this mission – I've packed a Delicate Bible in your kit to help.

— The CD player you were holding self destructs.

The Villain Dossier

Name

Bryce Rowe

Alias

"Silver Koalas"

Features

4' 10"

Blue eyes

Small mole / Right eye

Organization

The Agency of Small Advertisement

Emotions

Excited

Personality

Sedately Fluffy

Motive

Take over a government to lead a mutiny

Bodyguard

Sam the "Raw Meerkat"

Physical Size

Bantam

Story

Additional Locations

The Chilly Forest

Desolate Festival

Instability Acropolis

Random Events

Demon Finds gold in the water

Spectator drops from the sky

Storm overflows

Crowd Is frozen into a block of ice

World

Stores

Eli's Window Hole

Harris's Grandfather Clock Consulting

Peters's Shoe Horn Threads

Quinn's Crate Bureau

Traps

Crushing Room

Fusillade of Darts of Fire

Objects

Window made of heavy metal

Shoe Horn children's replica

Secret Grandfather Clock

Hidden Guthook

Cutlass of Fire

Wand of Wonder

Caster’s spellbook can be judged by its cover

People

Name Codename Career Likes Dislikes
Damian Harris "All Stomachs" Merchant Balloons Batteries
Liam Peters "Blue Cappuccinos" Mole Fire Dice
William Cook Professional Bridesmaid Snowglobes Singing
Eli Bauer Physician Water Honey
Michelle Quinn Soul Sharp Things Sticky Notes

Cipher



                

                
 
                

                

                

                

                

                

The Fuck Is This?

After years of playing Dungeons & Dragons, I decided to make a variation where everything is improv. The DM knows as much as the players and you tell a story together - sitcom style. We use this site as a quest starter, think of some characters, and see how much we can make each other laugh.

It's designed to be simple, portable, and dependent on being creative & inventive. I wanted a framework to guide the plot forward but let us find the story. This page is just a guide to help the stories become too redundant - take as much as you want, ignore as much as you need. If you want to follow along with our adventures or read some examples, check out my personal story notes.

This concept and site was crafted by Andrew Maruska with linguistic help from Evan Stark

But how?

The Most Important Rule

Be Silly. The goal is to laugh not to have a normal adventure. Someone wants to go to the moon? Fuck yeah they do and we're going to do it with medieval technology.

Set Up

Give the players a home base, a year they want to play in, and some general ownership of the setup. It's more successful when everyone has helped create the world because when a player makes suggestions it's easier to integrate them without feeling too precious. It helps to have a figurehead that assigns the quest to authoritatively start.

Characters

90% of creating a character here is a funny voice you're forced to talk in for 3 hours. I typically have people pick one trait they want to be good at and give them a slight advantage when using that - and the same for a negative trait. Don't overcomplicate it. They wanna be a skateboarder who can't feel love? perfect. +2 to cool & -2 to social acceptance.

Rolling

This can be whatever you want but as a general rule I use d20's as a graded scale. Sometimes, I craft the roll to mimic the action i.e. if they are walking a tight rope then might need to roll a 10 because 20 & 1 make them fall to one side or the other. Rolling in D&D got boring so make it fun again.

Dungeon Master

Your goal is to say 'Yes and...' but realistically it's 'Yes and roll to see if you can actually do that triple backflip down the cliff to mount the attacking phoenix...' - It's okay to make them fail, just don't tell them no. This guide is to help you be 1 step ahead of the players but it can't know the vibe of the room, have some empathy and play to the crowd.

Ending

No one can tell you this. The guide is to help you get 1/3 of the adventure set up and the rest will be created by the adventuring party. Have fun with it and try to tie up some loose ends at the end (or don't and bring them back for another adventure).