The Director Welcomes You

Who is Larry Wax?

#9d52ad

Location

Cool, Mild Guinea-Bissau

Time of Day

7:46

Extraction Point

142 Miles NNE

Time to Complete

28 Hours

Sleuths,
As you can see you are trapped inside be locked inside of a Deserted Sanctuary . We almost couldn't find you — Please explain when you get back. All we know is "All Elephants" is responsible and they sent us this message - "A vagrant asks for food at the graveyard". Your mission was black bag, achieve what you can.

Hopefully you still have that Clandestine Plier hidden on you.

— The Messenger Pigeon you were holding self destructs.

The Villain Dossier

Name

Layla Jacobs

Alias

"All Elephants"

Features

5' 8"

Brown eyes

Small mole / Right leg

Organization

The Community of Dazzling Hen

Emotions

Interested

Personality

Kindheartedly Dead

Motive

Disrupt the military out of survival

Bodyguard

Larry the "Contemporary Gargoyle"

Physical Size

Meager

Story

Additional Locations

The Huge Circus

Archaic Spring

Rage Lake

Random Events

Toilet Protests

Squirrel Is hurled at the adventurers

Procession Pulls on the coat tails of one of the adventurers

Chauvinist is loose

World

Stores

Elias's Fruit Bowl Mall

Arnold's Quill and Ink Atelier

Vargas's Bicycle Arcade

Cohen's Chaise Outlet

Traps

Moving Executioner Statue

Beehive of Purity

Objects

Fruit Bowl children's replica

Bicycle that is glowing

Secret Quill and Ink

Hidden Katana

Shield of Purity

Wand of Wonder

Caster thinks that his soul was forced into this current body

People

Name Codename Career Likes Dislikes
Calvin Arnold "Stiff Waffles" Merchant Fire Paper
Brooklyn Vargas "Heavy Knuckles" Mole Squirrels Squirrels
Elias Holt Headhunter Oranges Potatoes
Elias Pratt Townsfolk Batteries Potatoes
Harrison Cohen Operator Flashlights Balloons

Cipher



                

                
 
                

                

                

                

                

                

The Fuck Is This?

After years of playing Dungeons & Dragons, I decided to make a variation where everything is improv. The DM knows as much as the players and you tell a story together - sitcom style. We use this site as a quest starter, think of some characters, and see how much we can make each other laugh.

It's designed to be simple, portable, and dependent on being creative & inventive. I wanted a framework to guide the plot forward but let us find the story. This page is just a guide to help the stories become too redundant - take as much as you want, ignore as much as you need. If you want to follow along with our adventures or read some examples, check out my personal story notes.

This concept and site was crafted by Andrew Maruska with linguistic help from Evan Stark

But how?

The Most Important Rule

Be Silly. The goal is to laugh not to have a normal adventure. Someone wants to go to the moon? Fuck yeah they do and we're going to do it with medieval technology.

Set Up

Give the players a home base, a year they want to play in, and some general ownership of the setup. It's more successful when everyone has helped create the world because when a player makes suggestions it's easier to integrate them without feeling too precious. It helps to have a figurehead that assigns the quest to authoritatively start.

Characters

90% of creating a character here is a funny voice you're forced to talk in for 3 hours. I typically have people pick one trait they want to be good at and give them a slight advantage when using that - and the same for a negative trait. Don't overcomplicate it. They wanna be a skateboarder who can't feel love? perfect. +2 to cool & -2 to social acceptance.

Rolling

This can be whatever you want but as a general rule I use d20's as a graded scale. Sometimes, I craft the roll to mimic the action i.e. if they are walking a tight rope then might need to roll a 10 because 20 & 1 make them fall to one side or the other. Rolling in D&D got boring so make it fun again.

Dungeon Master

Your goal is to say 'Yes and...' but realistically it's 'Yes and roll to see if you can actually do that triple backflip down the cliff to mount the attacking phoenix...' - It's okay to make them fail, just don't tell them no. This guide is to help you be 1 step ahead of the players but it can't know the vibe of the room, have some empathy and play to the crowd.

Ending

No one can tell you this. The guide is to help you get 1/3 of the adventure set up and the rest will be created by the adventuring party. Have fun with it and try to tie up some loose ends at the end (or don't and bring them back for another adventure).