The Director Welcomes You

Party, Existence, Sewer, Spy.

#30a0a7

Location

Icy, Wet Korea, South

Time of Day

16:37

Extraction Point

193 Miles SSE

Time to Complete

19 Hours

Undercover Emissaries,
We need your help. Agent Alexander Ramos has gone missing and we believe "Violet Alien" is responsible. They were last seen in Korea, South at 22:18. The agent sent one final message – "A vagrant asks for food at the Tempest". Take this Feminine Plier - it was their favorite tool and might help you.

— The Origami Swan you were holding self destructs.

The Villain Dossier

Name

Emma Torres

Alias

"Violet Alien"

Features

6' 5"

Heterochromia eyes

Stretch Marks / Right arm

Organization

The company of Squeaking Sewer

Emotions

Dismayed

Personality

Cruelly Tertiary

Motive

Make a lot of money for fear of the heroes

Bodyguard

Jose the "Panicky Rabbit"

Physical Size

Gigantic

Story

Additional Locations

The Sovereign House

Deserted Manor

Euphoria Pond

Random Events

Lactose Intolerance is heard screaming

Alligator drops from the sky

Cauldron Evades the law

Soup chase a suspect

World

Stores

Jade's Ring Cosmetics

Mendez's Platter Closet

Hardy's Goblet Emporium

Ramos's Statue Logistics

Traps

Symbol of Hypnosis

Beehive of Grave Consequences

Objects

Ring with a False bottom

Goblet children's replica

Secret Platter

Hidden Helmet

Cutlass of Grave Consequences

Wand of Wonder

The target point is a tiny gateway to some distant world

People

Name Codename Career Likes Dislikes
Cooper Mendez "Cramped Lungs" Merchant Slippers Octopus
Daniela Hardy "Big Knuckles" Mole Oranges Clocks
Samantha Myers Physician Sticks Contracts
Jade Thornton Blacksmith Tigers Soap
Alexander Ramos Animator Lipstick Physics

Cipher



                

                
 
                

                

                

                

                

                

The Fuck Is This?

After years of playing Dungeons & Dragons, I decided to make a variation where everything is improv. The DM knows as much as the players and you tell a story together - sitcom style. We use this site as a quest starter, think of some characters, and see how much we can make each other laugh.

It's designed to be simple, portable, and dependent on being creative & inventive. I wanted a framework to guide the plot forward but let us find the story. This page is just a guide to help the stories become too redundant - take as much as you want, ignore as much as you need. If you want to follow along with our adventures or read some examples, check out my personal story notes.

This concept and site was crafted by Andrew Maruska with linguistic help from Evan Stark

But how?

The Most Important Rule

Be Silly. The goal is to laugh not to have a normal adventure. Someone wants to go to the moon? Fuck yeah they do and we're going to do it with medieval technology.

Set Up

Give the players a home base, a year they want to play in, and some general ownership of the setup. It's more successful when everyone has helped create the world because when a player makes suggestions it's easier to integrate them without feeling too precious. It helps to have a figurehead that assigns the quest to authoritatively start.

Characters

90% of creating a character here is a funny voice you're forced to talk in for 3 hours. I typically have people pick one trait they want to be good at and give them a slight advantage when using that - and the same for a negative trait. Don't overcomplicate it. They wanna be a skateboarder who can't feel love? perfect. +2 to cool & -2 to social acceptance.

Rolling

This can be whatever you want but as a general rule I use d20's as a graded scale. Sometimes, I craft the roll to mimic the action i.e. if they are walking a tight rope then might need to roll a 10 because 20 & 1 make them fall to one side or the other. Rolling in D&D got boring so make it fun again.

Dungeon Master

Your goal is to say 'Yes and...' but realistically it's 'Yes and roll to see if you can actually do that triple backflip down the cliff to mount the attacking phoenix...' - It's okay to make them fail, just don't tell them no. This guide is to help you be 1 step ahead of the players but it can't know the vibe of the room, have some empathy and play to the crowd.

Ending

No one can tell you this. The guide is to help you get 1/3 of the adventure set up and the rest will be created by the adventuring party. Have fun with it and try to tie up some loose ends at the end (or don't and bring them back for another adventure).