The Director Welcomes You

Zebra, Purse, Rocket, Spy.

#01b11a

Location

Gorgeous, Cloudless Cuba

Time of Day

17:33

Extraction Point

37 Miles NWW

Time to Complete

40 Hours

Detectives,
We need your help. Agent Aurora Stephens has gone missing and we believe "Tough Giraffe" is responsible. They were last seen in Cuba at 11:20. The agent sent one final message – "A shrine is nearby at the Devil's barrow". Take this Fluffy Spoon - it was their favorite tool and might help you.

— The CD player you were holding self destructs.

The Villain Dossier

Name

Ryker Davis

Alias

"Tough Giraffe"

Features

5' 2"

Brown eyes

Small mole / Left middle finger

Organization

The Commission of Wonderful Rocket

Emotions

Bored

Personality

Highly Putrid

Motive

Take over a government out of survival

Bodyguard

Nick the "Putrid Koalas"

Physical Size

Elder

Story

Additional Locations

The Strungout Park

Hidden Forge

Delight House

Random Events

Milk Shipment overflows

Water Vessel chase a suspect

Bottle of Soy Sauce explodes

Thief Lunges at the group

World

Stores

Teagan's Fire poker set Brothers

Reyes's Candlesticks Properties

Higgins's Mirror Closet

Stephens's Kitchen knife Creative

Traps

Acid Arrow

Ray of Sickness of Perspiration

Objects

Fire poker set with a False bottom

Mirror with a False bottom

Secret Candlesticks

Hidden Goblet

Greaves of Perspiration

Wand of Wonder

Someone nearby is drawn and quartered

People

Name Codename Career Likes Dislikes
Richard Reyes "Nice Falafels" Merchant Photography Gym Memberships
Miles Higgins "One Tongues" Mole Lions Sponges
Sydney Mendoza Cranky Butterflies Soda
Teagan Kelley Flirty Music Rubber Stamps
Aurora Stephens Broker Pillows Drinking

Cipher



                

                
 
                

                

                

                

                

                

The Fuck Is This?

After years of playing Dungeons & Dragons, I decided to make a variation where everything is improv. The DM knows as much as the players and you tell a story together - sitcom style. We use this site as a quest starter, think of some characters, and see how much we can make each other laugh.

It's designed to be simple, portable, and dependent on being creative & inventive. I wanted a framework to guide the plot forward but let us find the story. This page is just a guide to help the stories become too redundant - take as much as you want, ignore as much as you need. If you want to follow along with our adventures or read some examples, check out my personal story notes.

This concept and site was crafted by Andrew Maruska with linguistic help from Evan Stark

But how?

The Most Important Rule

Be Silly. The goal is to laugh not to have a normal adventure. Someone wants to go to the moon? Fuck yeah they do and we're going to do it with medieval technology.

Set Up

Give the players a home base, a year they want to play in, and some general ownership of the setup. It's more successful when everyone has helped create the world because when a player makes suggestions it's easier to integrate them without feeling too precious. It helps to have a figurehead that assigns the quest to authoritatively start.

Characters

90% of creating a character here is a funny voice you're forced to talk in for 3 hours. I typically have people pick one trait they want to be good at and give them a slight advantage when using that - and the same for a negative trait. Don't overcomplicate it. They wanna be a skateboarder who can't feel love? perfect. +2 to cool & -2 to social acceptance.

Rolling

This can be whatever you want but as a general rule I use d20's as a graded scale. Sometimes, I craft the roll to mimic the action i.e. if they are walking a tight rope then might need to roll a 10 because 20 & 1 make them fall to one side or the other. Rolling in D&D got boring so make it fun again.

Dungeon Master

Your goal is to say 'Yes and...' but realistically it's 'Yes and roll to see if you can actually do that triple backflip down the cliff to mount the attacking phoenix...' - It's okay to make them fail, just don't tell them no. This guide is to help you be 1 step ahead of the players but it can't know the vibe of the room, have some empathy and play to the crowd.

Ending

No one can tell you this. The guide is to help you get 1/3 of the adventure set up and the rest will be created by the adventuring party. Have fun with it and try to tie up some loose ends at the end (or don't and bring them back for another adventure).