The Director Welcomes You

Industries Royale

#7b91b9

Location

Hot, Chilly Ireland

Time of Day

17:46

Extraction Point

56 Miles SSE

Time to Complete

27 Hours

Informants,
As you can see you are trapped inside be locked inside of a Underground Crypt . We almost couldn't find you — Please explain when you get back. All we know is "Casual Dragon" is responsible and they sent us this message - "A shadow passes at the Unicorn Nest". Your mission was clandestine, achieve what you can.

Hopefully you still have that Fluffy Coin hidden on you.

— The CD player you were holding self destructs.

The Villain Dossier

Name

Abigail Peters

Alias

"Casual Dragon"

Features

6' 3"

Blue eyes

A second belly button / Left middle finger

Organization

The Authority of Robust Hen

Emotions

Curious

Personality

Devotedly Hirsute

Motive

Take over a country to lust for power

Bodyguard

Darnell the "Chunky all-seeing eye"

Physical Size

Colossal

Story

Additional Locations

The Bewildered Peninsula

Archaic City

Power Carousal

Random Events

Water Vessel Gets their hand chopped off

Diary Attempts to rob a bank

Sewer Attempts to rob a bank

Chanting Cult is heard screaming

World

Stores

Jasmine's Desk Industries

Todd's Figurine Bazaar

Dixon's Lamp Beauty Stop

Sandoval's Barrel Little shop

Traps

Fire

Bricks from Ceiling of Oblivion

Objects

Desk children's replica

Lamp that has been hollowed out

Secret Figurine

Hidden Blades

Glasses of Oblivion

Wand of Wonder

Target sprouts an intelligent fungus atop his head

People

Name Codename Career Likes Dislikes
Carlos Todd "Tough Thumbs" Merchant Water Snowglobes
Daisy Dixon "Bullet Kidneys" Mole Batteries Fire
Audrey Williamson Elder Technology Essential Oils
Jasmine Rhodes Animator Paper Houses
Dawson Sandoval Zestful Horses Washing Machines

Cipher



                

                
 
                

                

                

                

                

                

The Fuck Is This?

After years of playing Dungeons & Dragons, I decided to make a variation where everything is improv. The DM knows as much as the players and you tell a story together - sitcom style. We use this site as a quest starter, think of some characters, and see how much we can make each other laugh.

It's designed to be simple, portable, and dependent on being creative & inventive. I wanted a framework to guide the plot forward but let us find the story. This page is just a guide to help the stories become too redundant - take as much as you want, ignore as much as you need. If you want to follow along with our adventures or read some examples, check out my personal story notes.

This concept and site was crafted by Andrew Maruska with linguistic help from Evan Stark

But how?

The Most Important Rule

Be Silly. The goal is to laugh not to have a normal adventure. Someone wants to go to the moon? Fuck yeah they do and we're going to do it with medieval technology.

Set Up

Give the players a home base, a year they want to play in, and some general ownership of the setup. It's more successful when everyone has helped create the world because when a player makes suggestions it's easier to integrate them without feeling too precious. It helps to have a figurehead that assigns the quest to authoritatively start.

Characters

90% of creating a character here is a funny voice you're forced to talk in for 3 hours. I typically have people pick one trait they want to be good at and give them a slight advantage when using that - and the same for a negative trait. Don't overcomplicate it. They wanna be a skateboarder who can't feel love? perfect. +2 to cool & -2 to social acceptance.

Rolling

This can be whatever you want but as a general rule I use d20's as a graded scale. Sometimes, I craft the roll to mimic the action i.e. if they are walking a tight rope then might need to roll a 10 because 20 & 1 make them fall to one side or the other. Rolling in D&D got boring so make it fun again.

Dungeon Master

Your goal is to say 'Yes and...' but realistically it's 'Yes and roll to see if you can actually do that triple backflip down the cliff to mount the attacking phoenix...' - It's okay to make them fail, just don't tell them no. This guide is to help you be 1 step ahead of the players but it can't know the vibe of the room, have some empathy and play to the crowd.

Ending

No one can tell you this. The guide is to help you get 1/3 of the adventure set up and the rest will be created by the adventuring party. Have fun with it and try to tie up some loose ends at the end (or don't and bring them back for another adventure).