The Director Welcomes You

The Death Perspiration Incident

#11c163

Location

Rainy, Dry Mexico

Time of Day

18:57

Extraction Point

41 Miles N

Time to Complete

41 Hours

Silent Negotiators,
This week should be easy. You are delivering a crutch made of heavy metal. Get to Mexico at 03:12

Good Luck.

— The Tablet of Stone you were holding self destructs.

The Villain Dossier

Name

Aubree Fisher

Alias

"Golden ghost"

Features

5' 5"

Heterochromia eyes

Faint curved scar / Crotch

Organization

The Brotherhood of Dazzling Oatmeal

Emotions

Uncertain

Personality

Loyally Ambitious

Motive

Take over a country to lust for power

Bodyguard

Jose the "Sour Roc"

Physical Size

Teeny

Story

Additional Locations

The Facetious Crypt

Overpopulated Villa

Pleasure House

Random Events

Dead Animal arrives in the mail

Rhapsody strikes the ground

Tramp Glistens gently

Hoard Ignites violently

World

Stores

Everly's crutch Technologies

Manning's Barrel Outlet

Goodman's Portrait Industries

Miles's Credenza Solutions

Traps

Falling Block

Black Tentacles of Perspiration

Objects

crutch made of heavy metal

Portrait made of heavy metal

Secret Barrel

Hidden Key

Pike of Perspiration

Wand of Wonder

A local ruler is under the control of infernal powers

People

Name Codename Career Likes Dislikes
Nolan Manning "Right Toes" Merchant Robots Dice
Jason Goodman "Fat Bones" Mole Notes Baseball
Angelina Cook Physician Butterflies Water
Everly Lambert Lawyer Whipped Cream Soccer
Emily Miles Bounty hunter Sticks Doors

Cipher



                

                
 
                

                

                

                

                

                

The Fuck Is This?

After years of playing Dungeons & Dragons, I decided to make a variation where everything is improv. The DM knows as much as the players and you tell a story together - sitcom style. We use this site as a quest starter, think of some characters, and see how much we can make each other laugh.

It's designed to be simple, portable, and dependent on being creative & inventive. I wanted a framework to guide the plot forward but let us find the story. This page is just a guide to help the stories become too redundant - take as much as you want, ignore as much as you need. If you want to follow along with our adventures or read some examples, check out my personal story notes.

This concept and site was crafted by Andrew Maruska with linguistic help from Evan Stark

But how?

The Most Important Rule

Be Silly. The goal is to laugh not to have a normal adventure. Someone wants to go to the moon? Fuck yeah they do and we're going to do it with medieval technology.

Set Up

Give the players a home base, a year they want to play in, and some general ownership of the setup. It's more successful when everyone has helped create the world because when a player makes suggestions it's easier to integrate them without feeling too precious. It helps to have a figurehead that assigns the quest to authoritatively start.

Characters

90% of creating a character here is a funny voice you're forced to talk in for 3 hours. I typically have people pick one trait they want to be good at and give them a slight advantage when using that - and the same for a negative trait. Don't overcomplicate it. They wanna be a skateboarder who can't feel love? perfect. +2 to cool & -2 to social acceptance.

Rolling

This can be whatever you want but as a general rule I use d20's as a graded scale. Sometimes, I craft the roll to mimic the action i.e. if they are walking a tight rope then might need to roll a 10 because 20 & 1 make them fall to one side or the other. Rolling in D&D got boring so make it fun again.

Dungeon Master

Your goal is to say 'Yes and...' but realistically it's 'Yes and roll to see if you can actually do that triple backflip down the cliff to mount the attacking phoenix...' - It's okay to make them fail, just don't tell them no. This guide is to help you be 1 step ahead of the players but it can't know the vibe of the room, have some empathy and play to the crowd.

Ending

No one can tell you this. The guide is to help you get 1/3 of the adventure set up and the rest will be created by the adventuring party. Have fun with it and try to tie up some loose ends at the end (or don't and bring them back for another adventure).