The Director Welcomes You

The Cat Violence Incident

#cee97b

Location

Sunny, Gorgeous Saudi Arabia

Time of Day

23:2

Extraction Point

26 Miles N

Time to Complete

1 Hours

Informants,
This week should be easy. You are delivering a Wingback chair that is glowing. Get to Saudi Arabia at 24:10

Good Luck.

— The Origami Swan you were holding self destructs.

The Villain Dossier

Name

Audrey Thompson

Alias

"Little Vampires"

Features

7' 4"

Brown eyes

Small mole / Right eye

Organization

The Society of Prickly Volcano

Emotions

Helpless

Personality

Inquisitively Enlightened

Motive

Take over a government for fear of the heroes

Bodyguard

Tim the "Grumpy Hobgoblin"

Physical Size

Bantam

Story

Additional Locations

The Dangerous Lagoon

Underwater Palace

Weakness Lake

Random Events

Pickpocket catches on fire

Bag of Lemons Is frozen into a block of ice

Thief Calls menacingly

Building Is throwing a BBQ

World

Stores

Jacob's Wingback chair Convenience store

Hill's Cabinet Consulting

McDaniel's Sofa Du jour

Richards's Pair of Statues Arcade

Traps

Poison Needle

Ghoul Touch of Violence

Objects

Wingback chair that is glowing

Sofa that is glowing

Secret Cabinet

Hidden Ring

Boomerang of Violence

Wand of Wonder

Everyone within 100 yards feels intense hatred toward the target

People

Name Codename Career Likes Dislikes
Taylor Hill "Drowsy Noses" Merchant Syrup Easter
Mckenzie McDaniel "Junior Noses" Mole Writers Scarves
Nicole Soto Weakened Books Syrup
Jacob Ferguson Optimistic Batteries Bread
Katherine Richards Exhausted Octopus Flowers

Cipher



                

                
 
                

                

                

                

                

                

The Fuck Is This?

After years of playing Dungeons & Dragons, I decided to make a variation where everything is improv. The DM knows as much as the players and you tell a story together - sitcom style. We use this site as a quest starter, think of some characters, and see how much we can make each other laugh.

It's designed to be simple, portable, and dependent on being creative & inventive. I wanted a framework to guide the plot forward but let us find the story. This page is just a guide to help the stories become too redundant - take as much as you want, ignore as much as you need. If you want to follow along with our adventures or read some examples, check out my personal story notes.

This concept and site was crafted by Andrew Maruska with linguistic help from Evan Stark

But how?

The Most Important Rule

Be Silly. The goal is to laugh not to have a normal adventure. Someone wants to go to the moon? Fuck yeah they do and we're going to do it with medieval technology.

Set Up

Give the players a home base, a year they want to play in, and some general ownership of the setup. It's more successful when everyone has helped create the world because when a player makes suggestions it's easier to integrate them without feeling too precious. It helps to have a figurehead that assigns the quest to authoritatively start.

Characters

90% of creating a character here is a funny voice you're forced to talk in for 3 hours. I typically have people pick one trait they want to be good at and give them a slight advantage when using that - and the same for a negative trait. Don't overcomplicate it. They wanna be a skateboarder who can't feel love? perfect. +2 to cool & -2 to social acceptance.

Rolling

This can be whatever you want but as a general rule I use d20's as a graded scale. Sometimes, I craft the roll to mimic the action i.e. if they are walking a tight rope then might need to roll a 10 because 20 & 1 make them fall to one side or the other. Rolling in D&D got boring so make it fun again.

Dungeon Master

Your goal is to say 'Yes and...' but realistically it's 'Yes and roll to see if you can actually do that triple backflip down the cliff to mount the attacking phoenix...' - It's okay to make them fail, just don't tell them no. This guide is to help you be 1 step ahead of the players but it can't know the vibe of the room, have some empathy and play to the crowd.

Ending

No one can tell you this. The guide is to help you get 1/3 of the adventure set up and the rest will be created by the adventuring party. Have fun with it and try to tie up some loose ends at the end (or don't and bring them back for another adventure).