The Director Welcomes You

Operation — Garrulous Spoon

#931c04

Location

Wet, Balmy The Bahamas

Time of Day

22:2

Extraction Point

198 Miles W

Time to Complete

17 Hours

Snoopers,
It seems "Blue Pegasus" has gone level 1. They have been broadcasting this message "Tracks of wolves can be seen at the graveyard". We need you to eliminate them, Inwardly. Their last known location was recorded at 02:13. You have a Delicate Watch as a last resort. Use carefully.

— The Vinyl record player you were holding self destructs.

The Villain Dossier

Name

Ashley Espinoza

Alias

"Blue Pegasus"

Features

7' 5"

Heterochromia eyes

Stretch Marks / Right middle finger

Organization

The Council of Nutritious Guide

Emotions

Annoyed

Personality

Inwardly Tertiary

Motive

Take over a government out of jealousy

Bodyguard

Jerry the "Crooked Manticore"

Physical Size

Narrow

Story

Additional Locations

The Garrulous Villa

Underwater Mansion

Secrecy Island

Random Events

Gypsy Is hurled at the adventurers

Soup skins a cat with his teeth

Vagrant gathers near a point of interest

Druid Finds gold in the water

World

Stores

George's Figurine Warehouse

Rogers's Music Box Ventures

White's Canopy Bed Hole

Gomez's Urn Discount

Traps

Flooded Corridor

Reverse Gravity of Fire

Objects

Figurine that is glowing

Canopy Bed children's replica

Secret Music Box

Hidden Whip

Notebook of Fire

Wand of Wonder

All magic rings within 50 yards fuse to their wearers’ fingers

People

Name Codename Career Likes Dislikes
Grace Rogers "Silver Livers" Merchant Broccoli Squirrels
Isla White "No Dumplings" Mole Lions Basketball
Emmett Hawkins Surveyor Squirrels Physics
George Alvarado Physician Cartography Rabbits
Camila Gomez Musician Tea Robots

Cipher



                

                
 
                

                

                

                

                

                

The Fuck Is This?

After years of playing Dungeons & Dragons, I decided to make a variation where everything is improv. The DM knows as much as the players and you tell a story together - sitcom style. We use this site as a quest starter, think of some characters, and see how much we can make each other laugh.

It's designed to be simple, portable, and dependent on being creative & inventive. I wanted a framework to guide the plot forward but let us find the story. This page is just a guide to help the stories become too redundant - take as much as you want, ignore as much as you need. If you want to follow along with our adventures or read some examples, check out my personal story notes.

This concept and site was crafted by Andrew Maruska with linguistic help from Evan Stark

But how?

The Most Important Rule

Be Silly. The goal is to laugh not to have a normal adventure. Someone wants to go to the moon? Fuck yeah they do and we're going to do it with medieval technology.

Set Up

Give the players a home base, a year they want to play in, and some general ownership of the setup. It's more successful when everyone has helped create the world because when a player makes suggestions it's easier to integrate them without feeling too precious. It helps to have a figurehead that assigns the quest to authoritatively start.

Characters

90% of creating a character here is a funny voice you're forced to talk in for 3 hours. I typically have people pick one trait they want to be good at and give them a slight advantage when using that - and the same for a negative trait. Don't overcomplicate it. They wanna be a skateboarder who can't feel love? perfect. +2 to cool & -2 to social acceptance.

Rolling

This can be whatever you want but as a general rule I use d20's as a graded scale. Sometimes, I craft the roll to mimic the action i.e. if they are walking a tight rope then might need to roll a 10 because 20 & 1 make them fall to one side or the other. Rolling in D&D got boring so make it fun again.

Dungeon Master

Your goal is to say 'Yes and...' but realistically it's 'Yes and roll to see if you can actually do that triple backflip down the cliff to mount the attacking phoenix...' - It's okay to make them fail, just don't tell them no. This guide is to help you be 1 step ahead of the players but it can't know the vibe of the room, have some empathy and play to the crowd.

Ending

No one can tell you this. The guide is to help you get 1/3 of the adventure set up and the rest will be created by the adventuring party. Have fun with it and try to tie up some loose ends at the end (or don't and bring them back for another adventure).