The Director Welcomes You

Manager, Thimble, Galley, Spy.

#c046ae

Location

Gorgeous, Cloudy Guinea

Time of Day

0:35

Extraction Point

199 Miles NE

Time to Complete

45 Hours

Informants,
We need your help. Agent Jaxson Dominguez has gone missing and we believe "Junior Chimera" is responsible. They were last seen in Guinea at 18:15. The agent sent one final message – "An out of place door appears at the Where grass will not grow". Take this Vicious Blaser - it was their favorite tool and might help you.

— The Portable Radio you were holding self destructs.

The Villain Dossier

Name

Antonio Lee

Alias

"Junior Chimera"

Features

6' 2"

Hazel eyes

Large moles / Left arm

Organization

The Department of Raspy Galley

Emotions

Grumpy

Personality

Vastly Modern

Motive

Take over a country fueled by conspiracy

Bodyguard

Billy the "Quick all-seeing eye"

Physical Size

Short

Story

Additional Locations

The Nutty Lagoon

Archaic Forest

Optimism Manor

Random Events

Procession runs over an infant

Vegetable Is throwing a BBQ

Rhapsody Is being detained

Building scurries by

World

Stores

Natalia's End Table Hole

Davidson's Mirror Cosmetics

Chan's Pocket watch Unlimited

Dominguez's Taxidermy animal Technologies

Traps

Chain Lightning

Dropping Ceiling of Fate

Objects

End Table that is glowing

Pocket watch that is glowing

Secret Mirror

Hidden Magazine

Dagger of Fate

Wand of Wonder

No matter how far the caster travels today, he winds up here

People

Name Codename Career Likes Dislikes
Jocelyn Davidson "Slow Lox" Merchant Cats Drinking
Paisley Chan "Left Legs" Mole Rubber Stamps Batteries
Austin Waters Annoyed Paper Teeth
Natalia Rios Psychiatrist Rabbits Comic Books
Jaxson Dominguez Dead Tired Painting Bears

Cipher



                

                
 
                

                

                

                

                

                

The Fuck Is This?

After years of playing Dungeons & Dragons, I decided to make a variation where everything is improv. The DM knows as much as the players and you tell a story together - sitcom style. We use this site as a quest starter, think of some characters, and see how much we can make each other laugh.

It's designed to be simple, portable, and dependent on being creative & inventive. I wanted a framework to guide the plot forward but let us find the story. This page is just a guide to help the stories become too redundant - take as much as you want, ignore as much as you need. If you want to follow along with our adventures or read some examples, check out my personal story notes.

This concept and site was crafted by Andrew Maruska with linguistic help from Evan Stark

But how?

The Most Important Rule

Be Silly. The goal is to laugh not to have a normal adventure. Someone wants to go to the moon? Fuck yeah they do and we're going to do it with medieval technology.

Set Up

Give the players a home base, a year they want to play in, and some general ownership of the setup. It's more successful when everyone has helped create the world because when a player makes suggestions it's easier to integrate them without feeling too precious. It helps to have a figurehead that assigns the quest to authoritatively start.

Characters

90% of creating a character here is a funny voice you're forced to talk in for 3 hours. I typically have people pick one trait they want to be good at and give them a slight advantage when using that - and the same for a negative trait. Don't overcomplicate it. They wanna be a skateboarder who can't feel love? perfect. +2 to cool & -2 to social acceptance.

Rolling

This can be whatever you want but as a general rule I use d20's as a graded scale. Sometimes, I craft the roll to mimic the action i.e. if they are walking a tight rope then might need to roll a 10 because 20 & 1 make them fall to one side or the other. Rolling in D&D got boring so make it fun again.

Dungeon Master

Your goal is to say 'Yes and...' but realistically it's 'Yes and roll to see if you can actually do that triple backflip down the cliff to mount the attacking phoenix...' - It's okay to make them fail, just don't tell them no. This guide is to help you be 1 step ahead of the players but it can't know the vibe of the room, have some empathy and play to the crowd.

Ending

No one can tell you this. The guide is to help you get 1/3 of the adventure set up and the rest will be created by the adventuring party. Have fun with it and try to tie up some loose ends at the end (or don't and bring them back for another adventure).