The Director Welcomes You

The Phone Excitement Protocol

#2518d6

Location

Warm, Dark Indonesia

Time of Day

4:16

Extraction Point

85 Miles W

Time to Complete

39 Hours

Investigators,
As you can see you are trapped inside the bottom of a Abandoned Masquerade . We almost couldn't find you — Please explain when you get back. All we know is "Indigo Dragon" is responsible and they sent us this message - "The earth shakes briefly at the Broken Face". Your mission was black ops, achieve what you can.

Hopefully you still have that Soft Toy hidden on you.

— The Origami Swan you were holding self destructs.

The Villain Dossier

Name

Luca Erickson

Alias

"Indigo Dragon"

Features

4' 10"

Gray eyes

Small mole / Right middle finger

Organization

The Clique of Tasteless Purse

Emotions

Disillusioned

Personality

Eventually Worried

Motive

Disrupt the military out of jealousy

Bodyguard

Sam the "Moist Fairy"

Physical Size

Modest

Story

Additional Locations

The Extensive Peninsula

Touristy Barn Dance

Destruction Peninsula

Random Events

Chicken Integrates silently into the group

Rustler explodes

Prostitute runs over an infant

Odor explodes

World

Stores

Lorenzo's Urn Outlet

Hanson's Butter Churner Bazaar

Tran's Flower in Vase Cosmetics

Watson's End Table Group

Traps

Burning Hands

Falling Block of Excitement

Objects

Urn with a False bottom

Flower in Vase made of heavy metal

Secret Butter Churner

Hidden Brass Knuckles

Sword of Excitement

Wand of Wonder

Target is suddenly wearing an ornate saddle of very high quality

People

Name Codename Career Likes Dislikes
Maddox Hanson "Yellow Pinky's" Merchant Lipstick Children's Stories
Maddox Tran "The Hot Dogs" Mole Soup Sailboats
Amy Estrada Meteorologist Rabbits Toilets
Lorenzo Bell Consultant Coffee Tea
Jesus Watson Paramedic Hammers Sponges

Cipher



                


                

                    
                    

                


                

                    
                    
 
                


                

                    
                    

                


                

                    
                    

                


                

                    
                    

                

                
                

                    
                    

                


                

                    
                    

                

              

            

          

        

      

    



    
      
      
 
        

          

            
The Fuck Is This?

          

          

            
            
After years of playing Dungeons & Dragons, I decided to make a variation where everything is improv. The DM knows as much as the players and you tell a story together - sitcom style. We use this site as a quest starter, think of some characters, and see how much we can make each other laugh.

            
            
It's designed to be simple, portable, and dependent on being creative & inventive. I wanted a framework to guide the plot forward but let us find the story. This page is just a guide to help the stories become too redundant - take as much as you want, ignore as much as you need. If you want to follow along with our adventures or read some examples, check out  my personal story notes.

            
            
This concept and site was crafted by Andrew Maruska with linguistic help from Evan Stark

          

        

      

    


    
      
      
 
        

          

            
But how?

          

          
            
            The Most Important Rule
            
Be Silly. The goal is to laugh not to have a normal adventure. Someone wants to go to the moon? Fuck yeah they do and we're going to do it with medieval technology.

            
            Set Up
            
Give the players a home base, a year they want to play in, and some general ownership of the setup. It's more successful when everyone has helped create the world because when a player makes suggestions it's easier to integrate them without feeling too precious. It helps to have a figurehead that assigns the quest to authoritatively start.

            
            Characters
            
90% of creating a character here is a funny voice you're forced to talk in for 3 hours. I typically have people pick one trait they want to be good at and give them a slight advantage when using that - and the same for a negative trait. Don't overcomplicate it. They wanna be a skateboarder who can't feel love? perfect. +2 to cool & -2 to social acceptance. 

            
            Rolling
            
This can be whatever you want but as a general rule I use d20's as a graded scale. Sometimes, I craft the roll to mimic the action i.e. if they are walking a tight rope then might need to roll a 10 because 20 & 1 make them fall to one side or the other. Rolling in D&D got boring so make it fun again. 

            
            Dungeon Master
            
Your goal is to say 'Yes and...' but realistically it's 'Yes and roll to see if you can actually do that triple backflip down the cliff to mount the attacking phoenix...' - It's okay to make them fail, just don't tell them no. This guide is to help you be 1 step ahead of the players but it can't know the vibe of the room, have some empathy and play to the crowd. 

            
            Ending
            
No one can tell you this. The guide is to help you get 1/3 of the adventure set up and the rest will be created by the adventuring party. Have fun with it and try to tie up some loose ends at the end (or don't and bring them back for another adventure).