The Director Welcomes You

Fly, Rum, The Pope, Spy.

#f1a877

Location

Cloudy, Icy Morocco

Time of Day

16:17

Extraction Point

169 Miles SSW

Time to Complete

39 Hours

Detectives,
I have sent you to climb a Bustling Motel to look for a suspect by the name "Left Spirit". This mission is intelligence. Their recent activity is concerning and we need you to assassinate the target. We don't know much about their goals but we've intercepted this cryptic message – "A mysterious key is found on the ground at the ruined castle".

We're low budget this mission – I've packed a Light Screwdriver in your kit to help.

β€” The Tinder Date you were holding self destructs.

The Villain Dossier

Name

Greyson Barton

Alias

"Left Spirit"

Features

7' 3"

Blue eyes

Large deep scar / Left middle finger

Organization

The Order of Blue The Pope

Emotions

Attraction

Personality

Yesterday Dusty

Motive

Take over a country justice for a wrong-doing

Bodyguard

Tim the "Fast Bigfoot"

Physical Size

Diminutive

Story

Additional Locations

The Incalculable Masquerade

Underwater Citadel

Bravery Maze

Random Events

Gang Calls menacingly

Thief Finds gold in the water

Box of Cigarette drops from the sky

Amulet Integrates silently into the group

World

Stores

Evan's Hatrack Collective

Simpson's Toolset Discount

Vargas's Faberge Egg Atelier

Tate's Sofa Convenience store

Traps

Ghoul Touch

Collapsing Column of Exuberance

Objects

Hatrack that has been hollowed out

Faberge Egg that is glowing

Secret Toolset

Hidden Watch

Sword of Exuberance

Wand of Wonder

If caster is wearing a magic ring, he thinks it’s consuming him

People

Name Codename Career Likes Dislikes
Raelynn Simpson "Obese Feet" Merchant Washing Machines Football
Taylor Vargas "Five Lungs" Mole Octopus Singing
Timothy Russell Professional Cuddler Bread Paperclips
Evan Potter Elevator Mechanic Hamsters Syrup
Patrick Tate Counselor Water Clocks

Cipher



                

                
 
                

                

                

                

                

                

The Fuck Is This?

After years of playing Dungeons & Dragons, I decided to make a variation where everything is improv. The DM knows as much as the players and you tell a story together - sitcom style. We use this site as a quest starter, think of some characters, and see how much we can make each other laugh.

It's designed to be simple, portable, and dependent on being creative & inventive. I wanted a framework to guide the plot forward but let us find the story. This page is just a guide to help the stories become too redundant - take as much as you want, ignore as much as you need. If you want to follow along with our adventures or read some examples, check out my personal story notes.

This concept and site was crafted by Andrew Maruska with linguistic help from Evan Stark

But how?

The Most Important Rule

Be Silly. The goal is to laugh not to have a normal adventure. Someone wants to go to the moon? Fuck yeah they do and we're going to do it with medieval technology.

Set Up

Give the players a home base, a year they want to play in, and some general ownership of the setup. It's more successful when everyone has helped create the world because when a player makes suggestions it's easier to integrate them without feeling too precious. It helps to have a figurehead that assigns the quest to authoritatively start.

Characters

90% of creating a character here is a funny voice you're forced to talk in for 3 hours. I typically have people pick one trait they want to be good at and give them a slight advantage when using that - and the same for a negative trait. Don't overcomplicate it. They wanna be a skateboarder who can't feel love? perfect. +2 to cool & -2 to social acceptance.

Rolling

This can be whatever you want but as a general rule I use d20's as a graded scale. Sometimes, I craft the roll to mimic the action i.e. if they are walking a tight rope then might need to roll a 10 because 20 & 1 make them fall to one side or the other. Rolling in D&D got boring so make it fun again.

Dungeon Master

Your goal is to say 'Yes and...' but realistically it's 'Yes and roll to see if you can actually do that triple backflip down the cliff to mount the attacking phoenix...' - It's okay to make them fail, just don't tell them no. This guide is to help you be 1 step ahead of the players but it can't know the vibe of the room, have some empathy and play to the crowd.

Ending

No one can tell you this. The guide is to help you get 1/3 of the adventure set up and the rest will be created by the adventuring party. Have fun with it and try to tie up some loose ends at the end (or don't and bring them back for another adventure).