The Director Welcomes You

Fang, Week, Safety, Spy.

#125851

Location

Wet, Dark Korea, South

Time of Day

5:44

Extraction Point

112 Miles NWW

Time to Complete

33 Hours

Undercover Emissaries,
This week should be easy. You are delivering a Creeping Vines with a False bottom. Get to Korea, South at 18:23

Good Luck.

— The Messenger Pigeon you were holding self destructs.

The Villain Dossier

Name

Eleanor Mack

Alias

"One Armadillo"

Features

7' 6"

Blue eyes

Small mole / Left middle finger

Organization

The Authority of Proud Safety

Emotions

Brave

Personality

Freely Crashing

Motive

Take over a government to become the best

Bodyguard

Mitch the "Gregorian Lion"

Physical Size

Colossal

Story

Additional Locations

The Helpless Tower

Touristy Spring

Irritation Creek

Random Events

Store scurries by

Building emerges

Demon Is throwing a BBQ

Fairy Is under a curse

World

Stores

Christian's Creeping Vines Industries

Cohen's Bicycle Du jour

Henderson's Lamp Unlimited

Guzman's Cabinet Solutions

Traps

Bear Trap

Built-to-Collapse Wall of Extinction

Objects

Creeping Vines with a False bottom

Lamp children's replica

Secret Bicycle

Hidden Medallion

Morning Star of Extinction

Wand of Wonder

Target’s death will inflict a plague upon the surrounding area

People

Name Codename Career Likes Dislikes
Jasper Cohen "Dull Ankles" Merchant Music Deodorant
Lyla Henderson "The Dumplings" Mole Music Trees
Isabel Lowe Hotel Manager Photography Quartz Crystals
Christian Park Geologist Ice Cubes Trees
Lyla Guzman Funeral Director Paperclips Chalk

Cipher



                

                
 
                

                

                

                

                

                

The Fuck Is This?

After years of playing Dungeons & Dragons, I decided to make a variation where everything is improv. The DM knows as much as the players and you tell a story together - sitcom style. We use this site as a quest starter, think of some characters, and see how much we can make each other laugh.

It's designed to be simple, portable, and dependent on being creative & inventive. I wanted a framework to guide the plot forward but let us find the story. This page is just a guide to help the stories become too redundant - take as much as you want, ignore as much as you need. If you want to follow along with our adventures or read some examples, check out my personal story notes.

This concept and site was crafted by Andrew Maruska with linguistic help from Evan Stark

But how?

The Most Important Rule

Be Silly. The goal is to laugh not to have a normal adventure. Someone wants to go to the moon? Fuck yeah they do and we're going to do it with medieval technology.

Set Up

Give the players a home base, a year they want to play in, and some general ownership of the setup. It's more successful when everyone has helped create the world because when a player makes suggestions it's easier to integrate them without feeling too precious. It helps to have a figurehead that assigns the quest to authoritatively start.

Characters

90% of creating a character here is a funny voice you're forced to talk in for 3 hours. I typically have people pick one trait they want to be good at and give them a slight advantage when using that - and the same for a negative trait. Don't overcomplicate it. They wanna be a skateboarder who can't feel love? perfect. +2 to cool & -2 to social acceptance.

Rolling

This can be whatever you want but as a general rule I use d20's as a graded scale. Sometimes, I craft the roll to mimic the action i.e. if they are walking a tight rope then might need to roll a 10 because 20 & 1 make them fall to one side or the other. Rolling in D&D got boring so make it fun again.

Dungeon Master

Your goal is to say 'Yes and...' but realistically it's 'Yes and roll to see if you can actually do that triple backflip down the cliff to mount the attacking phoenix...' - It's okay to make them fail, just don't tell them no. This guide is to help you be 1 step ahead of the players but it can't know the vibe of the room, have some empathy and play to the crowd.

Ending

No one can tell you this. The guide is to help you get 1/3 of the adventure set up and the rest will be created by the adventuring party. Have fun with it and try to tie up some loose ends at the end (or don't and bring them back for another adventure).