The Director Welcomes You

Industries Royale

#7bc0d5

Location

Dark, Foggy Greece

Time of Day

12:1

Extraction Point

168 Miles NW

Time to Complete

32 Hours

Spy Deputies,
We need your help. Agent Peyton Chang has gone missing and we believe "Violet Gremlin" is responsible. They were last seen in Greece at 21:22. The agent sent one final message – "A pool of blood at the Boneyard". Take this Vicious Hot Glue Gun - it was their favorite tool and might help you.

— The CD player you were holding self destructs.

The Villain Dossier

Name

Anthony Pearson

Alias

"Violet Gremlin"

Features

6' 8"

Hazel eyes

Stretch Marks / Crotch

Organization

The Club of Garrulous Mine

Emotions

Suspicious

Personality

Heavily Boiling

Motive

Disrupt the military to lust for power

Bodyguard

Al the "Worn Mummy"

Physical Size

Lanky

Story

Additional Locations

The Disruptive Grove

Touristy Crypt

Freshness Masquerade

Random Events

Cauldron drops from the sky

Bag of Flour meets disaster

Gallon of Trash Is being kidnapped

Pine Branch Bursts loudly

World

Stores

Steven's Coat of Arms Industries

Walsh's Desk Brothers

Barrett's Suit of armor Wardrobe

Chang's Mural Productions

Traps

Phantasmal Killer

Compacting Room of Indecision

Objects

Coat of Arms children's replica

Suit of armor that has been hollowed out

Secret Desk

Hidden Hatchet

Rock of Indecision

Wand of Wonder

While indoors, caster feels as if he’s dragging heavy chains

People

Name Codename Career Likes Dislikes
Ariel Walsh "Right Bagels" Merchant Christmas Soap
Hannah Barrett "Heavy Lungs" Mole Doves Soap
Brianna Stevenson Old Man Books Peanut Butter
Steven Reid Old Man Paperclips Chalk
Peyton Chang Psychiatrist Soccer Football

Cipher



                

                
 
                

                

                

                

                

                

The Fuck Is This?

After years of playing Dungeons & Dragons, I decided to make a variation where everything is improv. The DM knows as much as the players and you tell a story together - sitcom style. We use this site as a quest starter, think of some characters, and see how much we can make each other laugh.

It's designed to be simple, portable, and dependent on being creative & inventive. I wanted a framework to guide the plot forward but let us find the story. This page is just a guide to help the stories become too redundant - take as much as you want, ignore as much as you need. If you want to follow along with our adventures or read some examples, check out my personal story notes.

This concept and site was crafted by Andrew Maruska with linguistic help from Evan Stark

But how?

The Most Important Rule

Be Silly. The goal is to laugh not to have a normal adventure. Someone wants to go to the moon? Fuck yeah they do and we're going to do it with medieval technology.

Set Up

Give the players a home base, a year they want to play in, and some general ownership of the setup. It's more successful when everyone has helped create the world because when a player makes suggestions it's easier to integrate them without feeling too precious. It helps to have a figurehead that assigns the quest to authoritatively start.

Characters

90% of creating a character here is a funny voice you're forced to talk in for 3 hours. I typically have people pick one trait they want to be good at and give them a slight advantage when using that - and the same for a negative trait. Don't overcomplicate it. They wanna be a skateboarder who can't feel love? perfect. +2 to cool & -2 to social acceptance.

Rolling

This can be whatever you want but as a general rule I use d20's as a graded scale. Sometimes, I craft the roll to mimic the action i.e. if they are walking a tight rope then might need to roll a 10 because 20 & 1 make them fall to one side or the other. Rolling in D&D got boring so make it fun again.

Dungeon Master

Your goal is to say 'Yes and...' but realistically it's 'Yes and roll to see if you can actually do that triple backflip down the cliff to mount the attacking phoenix...' - It's okay to make them fail, just don't tell them no. This guide is to help you be 1 step ahead of the players but it can't know the vibe of the room, have some empathy and play to the crowd.

Ending

No one can tell you this. The guide is to help you get 1/3 of the adventure set up and the rest will be created by the adventuring party. Have fun with it and try to tie up some loose ends at the end (or don't and bring them back for another adventure).