The Director Welcomes You

Who is Donald Voyage?

#24db38

Location

Miserable, Windy Albania

Time of Day

20:28

Extraction Point

53 Miles S

Time to Complete

20 Hours

Sleuths,
As you can see you are trapped inside climb a Archaic Peninsula . We almost couldn't find you — Please explain when you get back. All we know is "Chunky Eel" is responsible and they sent us this message - "A shrine is nearby at the Big Momma". Your mission was counterintelligence, achieve what you can.

Hopefully you still have that Angry Wrench hidden on you.

— The Vinyl record player you were holding self destructs.

The Villain Dossier

Name

Maria Miller

Alias

"Chunky Eel"

Features

4' 8"

Hazel eyes

Large moles / Right leg

Organization

The Gang of Sweltering Food

Emotions

Content

Personality

Unimpressively Chewy

Motive

Make a lot of money to control the Children

Bodyguard

Donald the "Hyper Beast"

Physical Size

Huge

Story

Additional Locations

The Humid Creek

Desolate Carnival

Catastrophe Palace

Random Events

Meteor Gets their hand chopped off

Nearby Gas Tank strikes the ground

Bard Integrates silently into the group

Drunk Ignites violently

World

Stores

Skylar's Rubber Plant Consulting

Hoffman's Pair of Statues Labs

Watts's Chaise Outlet

Russell's Metal chair Factory

Traps

Chain Lightning

Extended Bane of Happiness

Objects

Rubber Plant that is glowing

Chaise that has been hollowed out

Secret Pair of Statues

Hidden Rapier

Frying Pan of Happiness

Wand of Wonder

Caster is suddenly standing in the nearest blacksmith’s smithy 1285 Caster is suddenly standing in the nearest brothel

People

Name Codename Career Likes Dislikes
Eden Hoffman "Orange Hearts" Merchant Easter Singing
David Watts "Tough Eyes" Mole Butterflies Fire
Eli Myers Accountant Dinosaurs Mirrors
Skylar Montgomery Veteran Whipped Cream Gym Memberships
Aubrey Russell Musician Shirts Drinking

Cipher



                

                
 
                

                

                

                

                

                

The Fuck Is This?

After years of playing Dungeons & Dragons, I decided to make a variation where everything is improv. The DM knows as much as the players and you tell a story together - sitcom style. We use this site as a quest starter, think of some characters, and see how much we can make each other laugh.

It's designed to be simple, portable, and dependent on being creative & inventive. I wanted a framework to guide the plot forward but let us find the story. This page is just a guide to help the stories become too redundant - take as much as you want, ignore as much as you need. If you want to follow along with our adventures or read some examples, check out my personal story notes.

This concept and site was crafted by Andrew Maruska with linguistic help from Evan Stark

But how?

The Most Important Rule

Be Silly. The goal is to laugh not to have a normal adventure. Someone wants to go to the moon? Fuck yeah they do and we're going to do it with medieval technology.

Set Up

Give the players a home base, a year they want to play in, and some general ownership of the setup. It's more successful when everyone has helped create the world because when a player makes suggestions it's easier to integrate them without feeling too precious. It helps to have a figurehead that assigns the quest to authoritatively start.

Characters

90% of creating a character here is a funny voice you're forced to talk in for 3 hours. I typically have people pick one trait they want to be good at and give them a slight advantage when using that - and the same for a negative trait. Don't overcomplicate it. They wanna be a skateboarder who can't feel love? perfect. +2 to cool & -2 to social acceptance.

Rolling

This can be whatever you want but as a general rule I use d20's as a graded scale. Sometimes, I craft the roll to mimic the action i.e. if they are walking a tight rope then might need to roll a 10 because 20 & 1 make them fall to one side or the other. Rolling in D&D got boring so make it fun again.

Dungeon Master

Your goal is to say 'Yes and...' but realistically it's 'Yes and roll to see if you can actually do that triple backflip down the cliff to mount the attacking phoenix...' - It's okay to make them fail, just don't tell them no. This guide is to help you be 1 step ahead of the players but it can't know the vibe of the room, have some empathy and play to the crowd.

Ending

No one can tell you this. The guide is to help you get 1/3 of the adventure set up and the rest will be created by the adventuring party. Have fun with it and try to tie up some loose ends at the end (or don't and bring them back for another adventure).