The Director Welcomes You

Zebra, Crime, Bust, Spy.

#0ca2d3

Location

Sunny, Arid Oman

Time of Day

5:43

Extraction Point

96 Miles NNW

Time to Complete

7 Hours

Undercover Emissaries,
We need your help. Agent Alyssa Cobb has gone missing and we believe "Three Dolphin" is responsible. They were last seen in Oman at 06:19. The agent sent one final message – "Clouds develop quickly at the Apple Orchard". Take this Dull Sun Lotion - it was their favorite tool and might help you.

— The Messenger Pigeon you were holding self destructs.

The Villain Dossier

Name

Elena Peterson

Alias

"Three Dolphin"

Features

5' 7"

Brown eyes

Stretch Marks / Left leg

Organization

The company of Bald Bust

Emotions

Cheerful

Personality

Madly Boned

Motive

Take over a country because of grief and loss

Bodyguard

Joseph the "Bad child"

Physical Size

Fat

Story

Additional Locations

The Dank Jungle

Underwater Barn Dance

Cleanliness Palace

Random Events

Pack of Wild Dogs Is being tortured

Chanting Cult Skips merrily

Tramp Protests

Fairy catches on fire

World

Stores

Asher's Music Box Logistics

Schmidt's Doorway Hole

Stone's Lounge Chair Beauty Stop

Cobb's Spice shelf Bazaar

Traps

Portcullis

Burning Hands of Extermination

Objects

Music Box children's replica

Lounge Chair that has been hollowed out

Secret Doorway

Hidden Blowgun

Boiled Leather of Extermination

Wand of Wonder

A 100 yard radius is encircled by a dense curtain of smoke

People

Name Codename Career Likes Dislikes
Angelina Schmidt "Green Elbows" Merchant Butterflies Butterflies
Jayden Stone "The Pastrami's" Mole Video Games Attention
Quinn Carter Elevator Mechanic Soup Syrup
Asher Ramsey Plumber Doves Singing
Alyssa Cobb Restless Limes Bread

Cipher



                

                
 
                

                

                

                

                

                

The Fuck Is This?

After years of playing Dungeons & Dragons, I decided to make a variation where everything is improv. The DM knows as much as the players and you tell a story together - sitcom style. We use this site as a quest starter, think of some characters, and see how much we can make each other laugh.

It's designed to be simple, portable, and dependent on being creative & inventive. I wanted a framework to guide the plot forward but let us find the story. This page is just a guide to help the stories become too redundant - take as much as you want, ignore as much as you need. If you want to follow along with our adventures or read some examples, check out my personal story notes.

This concept and site was crafted by Andrew Maruska with linguistic help from Evan Stark

But how?

The Most Important Rule

Be Silly. The goal is to laugh not to have a normal adventure. Someone wants to go to the moon? Fuck yeah they do and we're going to do it with medieval technology.

Set Up

Give the players a home base, a year they want to play in, and some general ownership of the setup. It's more successful when everyone has helped create the world because when a player makes suggestions it's easier to integrate them without feeling too precious. It helps to have a figurehead that assigns the quest to authoritatively start.

Characters

90% of creating a character here is a funny voice you're forced to talk in for 3 hours. I typically have people pick one trait they want to be good at and give them a slight advantage when using that - and the same for a negative trait. Don't overcomplicate it. They wanna be a skateboarder who can't feel love? perfect. +2 to cool & -2 to social acceptance.

Rolling

This can be whatever you want but as a general rule I use d20's as a graded scale. Sometimes, I craft the roll to mimic the action i.e. if they are walking a tight rope then might need to roll a 10 because 20 & 1 make them fall to one side or the other. Rolling in D&D got boring so make it fun again.

Dungeon Master

Your goal is to say 'Yes and...' but realistically it's 'Yes and roll to see if you can actually do that triple backflip down the cliff to mount the attacking phoenix...' - It's okay to make them fail, just don't tell them no. This guide is to help you be 1 step ahead of the players but it can't know the vibe of the room, have some empathy and play to the crowd.

Ending

No one can tell you this. The guide is to help you get 1/3 of the adventure set up and the rest will be created by the adventuring party. Have fun with it and try to tie up some loose ends at the end (or don't and bring them back for another adventure).