The Director Welcomes You

The Person Indecision Incident

#44f198

Location

Frigid, Wet Belarus

Time of Day

12:18

Extraction Point

56 Miles N

Time to Complete

36 Hours

Investigators,
As you can see you are trapped inside fly above a Desolate Motel . We almost couldn't find you — Please explain when you get back. All we know is "Right Zombie" is responsible and they sent us this message - "A vagrant asks for money at the Grove of Weeping Willows". Your mission was intelligence, achieve what you can.

Hopefully you still have that Angry Tissues hidden on you.

— The Burner Phone you were holding self destructs.

The Villain Dossier

Name

London Chang

Alias

"Right Zombie"

Features

7' 1"

Blue eyes

Large deep scar / Crotch

Organization

The League of Unimportant Butter

Emotions

Hostile

Personality

Scarcely Humid

Motive

Take over a government out of greed

Bodyguard

Penelope the "Horny Anteaters"

Physical Size

Immense

Story

Additional Locations

The Putrid Acropolis

Crowded Manor

Pleasure Chateau

Random Events

Princess Salutes the adventurers

Butter Shipment Is throwing a BBQ

Bum screams at the top of their lungs

Majestic Painting Adopts a nearby child

World

Stores

Caleb's Armoir Productions

Wolfe's Iron stove Department store

Burns's Clamp Industries

Cole's Glass Jars Solutions

Traps

Acid Fog

Ray of Sickness of Indecision

Objects

Armoir made of heavy metal

Clamp children's replica

Secret Iron stove

Hidden Boomerang

Sickle of Indecision

Wand of Wonder

Caster can speak with oysters while holding a pearl in his mouth

People

Name Codename Career Likes Dislikes
Jayce Wolfe "Stiff Throats" Merchant Trucks Bears
Valerie Burns "Violet Lungs" Mole Paperclips Paperclips
Rhett Herrera Broker Whipped Cream Lamps
Caleb Howell Hotel Manager Octopus Plushies
Faith Cole Acupuncturist Glitter Syrup

Cipher



                

                
 
                

                

                

                

                

                

The Fuck Is This?

After years of playing Dungeons & Dragons, I decided to make a variation where everything is improv. The DM knows as much as the players and you tell a story together - sitcom style. We use this site as a quest starter, think of some characters, and see how much we can make each other laugh.

It's designed to be simple, portable, and dependent on being creative & inventive. I wanted a framework to guide the plot forward but let us find the story. This page is just a guide to help the stories become too redundant - take as much as you want, ignore as much as you need. If you want to follow along with our adventures or read some examples, check out my personal story notes.

This concept and site was crafted by Andrew Maruska with linguistic help from Evan Stark

But how?

The Most Important Rule

Be Silly. The goal is to laugh not to have a normal adventure. Someone wants to go to the moon? Fuck yeah they do and we're going to do it with medieval technology.

Set Up

Give the players a home base, a year they want to play in, and some general ownership of the setup. It's more successful when everyone has helped create the world because when a player makes suggestions it's easier to integrate them without feeling too precious. It helps to have a figurehead that assigns the quest to authoritatively start.

Characters

90% of creating a character here is a funny voice you're forced to talk in for 3 hours. I typically have people pick one trait they want to be good at and give them a slight advantage when using that - and the same for a negative trait. Don't overcomplicate it. They wanna be a skateboarder who can't feel love? perfect. +2 to cool & -2 to social acceptance.

Rolling

This can be whatever you want but as a general rule I use d20's as a graded scale. Sometimes, I craft the roll to mimic the action i.e. if they are walking a tight rope then might need to roll a 10 because 20 & 1 make them fall to one side or the other. Rolling in D&D got boring so make it fun again.

Dungeon Master

Your goal is to say 'Yes and...' but realistically it's 'Yes and roll to see if you can actually do that triple backflip down the cliff to mount the attacking phoenix...' - It's okay to make them fail, just don't tell them no. This guide is to help you be 1 step ahead of the players but it can't know the vibe of the room, have some empathy and play to the crowd.

Ending

No one can tell you this. The guide is to help you get 1/3 of the adventure set up and the rest will be created by the adventuring party. Have fun with it and try to tie up some loose ends at the end (or don't and bring them back for another adventure).