The Director Welcomes You

Group Royale

#6ce4f2

Location

Foul, Cloudless Myanmar

Time of Day

1:47

Extraction Point

70 Miles E

Time to Complete

18 Hours

Scrutinizers,
I have sent you to approach a Archaic Suburbs to look for a suspect by the name "Tough Bat". This mission is intelligence. Their recent activity is concerning and we need you to disable the bomb. We don't know much about their goals but we've intercepted this cryptic message – "Tracks of wolves can be seen at the Stone Circle".

We're low budget this mission – I've packed a Feminine Bicycle in your kit to help.

— The Tinder Date you were holding self destructs.

The Villain Dossier

Name

Nova Bell

Alias

"Tough Bat"

Features

4' 11"

Red eyes

Small mole / Right middle finger

Organization

The Association of Fresh Balcony

Emotions

Powerless

Personality

Justly Many

Motive

Make a lot of money for sibling rivalry

Bodyguard

Tony the "Vast Wraith"

Physical Size

Massive

Story

Additional Locations

The Hollow Lagoon

Archaic City

Indecision Reef

Random Events

Wanderer catches on fire

Crow Balances on a ledge

Skeleton Crashes slowly

Dancer chase a suspect

World

Stores

Jeremy's Trophy Group

Murphy's Chaise Boutique

Norris's Ring Emporium

Kennedy's Statue Boutique

Traps

Camouflaged Pit

Camouflaged Pit of Demise

Objects

Trophy children's replica

Ring made of heavy metal

Secret Chaise

Hidden Nipple Clamp

Diary of Demise

Wand of Wonder

Target is obsessively protective of someone now standing nearby

People

Name Codename Career Likes Dislikes
Avery Murphy "Black Kidneys" Merchant Pillows Pillows
Nathan Norris "Sharp Waffles" Mole Mirrors Sun Glasses
Eleanor Ortiz Operator Essential Oils Painting
Jeremy Cummings Artist Sharp Things Boxes
Maxwell Kennedy Flirty Bears Cellphones

Cipher



                

                
 
                

                

                

                

                

                

The Fuck Is This?

After years of playing Dungeons & Dragons, I decided to make a variation where everything is improv. The DM knows as much as the players and you tell a story together - sitcom style. We use this site as a quest starter, think of some characters, and see how much we can make each other laugh.

It's designed to be simple, portable, and dependent on being creative & inventive. I wanted a framework to guide the plot forward but let us find the story. This page is just a guide to help the stories become too redundant - take as much as you want, ignore as much as you need. If you want to follow along with our adventures or read some examples, check out my personal story notes.

This concept and site was crafted by Andrew Maruska with linguistic help from Evan Stark

But how?

The Most Important Rule

Be Silly. The goal is to laugh not to have a normal adventure. Someone wants to go to the moon? Fuck yeah they do and we're going to do it with medieval technology.

Set Up

Give the players a home base, a year they want to play in, and some general ownership of the setup. It's more successful when everyone has helped create the world because when a player makes suggestions it's easier to integrate them without feeling too precious. It helps to have a figurehead that assigns the quest to authoritatively start.

Characters

90% of creating a character here is a funny voice you're forced to talk in for 3 hours. I typically have people pick one trait they want to be good at and give them a slight advantage when using that - and the same for a negative trait. Don't overcomplicate it. They wanna be a skateboarder who can't feel love? perfect. +2 to cool & -2 to social acceptance.

Rolling

This can be whatever you want but as a general rule I use d20's as a graded scale. Sometimes, I craft the roll to mimic the action i.e. if they are walking a tight rope then might need to roll a 10 because 20 & 1 make them fall to one side or the other. Rolling in D&D got boring so make it fun again.

Dungeon Master

Your goal is to say 'Yes and...' but realistically it's 'Yes and roll to see if you can actually do that triple backflip down the cliff to mount the attacking phoenix...' - It's okay to make them fail, just don't tell them no. This guide is to help you be 1 step ahead of the players but it can't know the vibe of the room, have some empathy and play to the crowd.

Ending

No one can tell you this. The guide is to help you get 1/3 of the adventure set up and the rest will be created by the adventuring party. Have fun with it and try to tie up some loose ends at the end (or don't and bring them back for another adventure).