The Director Welcomes You

Who is Nick Paste?

#015a89

Location

Hot, Cool Jamaica

Time of Day

3:46

Extraction Point

3 Miles NE

Time to Complete

42 Hours

Meddlers,
I have sent you to the outside of a Ancient Isle to look for a suspect by the name "Small Wendigo". This mission is clandestine. Their recent activity is concerning and we need you to discover their location. We don't know much about their goals but we've intercepted this cryptic message – "A black cat runs past at the Music Store".

We're low budget this mission – I've packed a Polished Cake in your kit to help.

β€” The Tinder Date you were holding self destructs.

The Villain Dossier

Name

Delilah Bowen

Alias

"Small Wendigo"

Features

4' 4"

Hazel eyes

Small mole / Left eye

Organization

The Bureau of Comical Nature

Emotions

Dismayed

Personality

Quietly Lively

Motive

Take over a government for honor

Bodyguard

Nick the "Worn potato"

Physical Size

Full

Story

Additional Locations

The Tiny Park

Overpopulated Creek

Extinction Lagoon

Random Events

Amulet meets disaster

Alligator Pulls on the coat tails of one of the adventurers

Dead Animal Becomes wounded

Soup Bursts loudly

World

Stores

Edward's Urn Mall

Shelton's Rug Properties

Ayala's Tea Pot Outlet

Cohen's Metal chair Du jour

Traps

Poison Dart

Black Tentacles of Happiness

Objects

Urn children's replica

Tea Pot children's replica

Secret Rug

Hidden Spikes

Cutlass of Happiness

Wand of Wonder

If caster is now bleeding, he’s immune to fire magic until sunset

People

Name Codename Career Likes Dislikes
Luke Shelton "Golden Legs" Merchant Hamsters Horses
Jace Ayala "Yellow Noses" Mole Dinosaurs Cartography
Edward Mejia Lawyer Football Deodorant
Edward Williamson Accountant Chili Gym Memberships
Jade Cohen Waiter Contracts Christmas

Cipher



                

                
 
                

                

                

                

                

                

The Fuck Is This?

After years of playing Dungeons & Dragons, I decided to make a variation where everything is improv. The DM knows as much as the players and you tell a story together - sitcom style. We use this site as a quest starter, think of some characters, and see how much we can make each other laugh.

It's designed to be simple, portable, and dependent on being creative & inventive. I wanted a framework to guide the plot forward but let us find the story. This page is just a guide to help the stories become too redundant - take as much as you want, ignore as much as you need. If you want to follow along with our adventures or read some examples, check out my personal story notes.

This concept and site was crafted by Andrew Maruska with linguistic help from Evan Stark

But how?

The Most Important Rule

Be Silly. The goal is to laugh not to have a normal adventure. Someone wants to go to the moon? Fuck yeah they do and we're going to do it with medieval technology.

Set Up

Give the players a home base, a year they want to play in, and some general ownership of the setup. It's more successful when everyone has helped create the world because when a player makes suggestions it's easier to integrate them without feeling too precious. It helps to have a figurehead that assigns the quest to authoritatively start.

Characters

90% of creating a character here is a funny voice you're forced to talk in for 3 hours. I typically have people pick one trait they want to be good at and give them a slight advantage when using that - and the same for a negative trait. Don't overcomplicate it. They wanna be a skateboarder who can't feel love? perfect. +2 to cool & -2 to social acceptance.

Rolling

This can be whatever you want but as a general rule I use d20's as a graded scale. Sometimes, I craft the roll to mimic the action i.e. if they are walking a tight rope then might need to roll a 10 because 20 & 1 make them fall to one side or the other. Rolling in D&D got boring so make it fun again.

Dungeon Master

Your goal is to say 'Yes and...' but realistically it's 'Yes and roll to see if you can actually do that triple backflip down the cliff to mount the attacking phoenix...' - It's okay to make them fail, just don't tell them no. This guide is to help you be 1 step ahead of the players but it can't know the vibe of the room, have some empathy and play to the crowd.

Ending

No one can tell you this. The guide is to help you get 1/3 of the adventure set up and the rest will be created by the adventuring party. Have fun with it and try to tie up some loose ends at the end (or don't and bring them back for another adventure).