The Director Welcomes You

Manager, Pastry, Ladybug, Spy.

#2d8269

Location

Icy, Balmy Azerbaijan

Time of Day

15:24

Extraction Point

67 Miles SW

Time to Complete

39 Hours

Undercover Emissaries,
This week should be easy. You are delivering a Faberge Egg children's replica. Get to Azerbaijan at 03:04

Good Luck.

— The iPod you were holding self destructs.

The Villain Dossier

Name

Madeline Guzman

Alias

"The Mutants"

Features

5' 9"

Red eyes

Small mole / Right thumb

Organization

The Bureau of Loquacious Ladybug

Emotions

Dismayed

Personality

Easily Sore

Motive

Disrupt the military fueled by conspiracy

Bodyguard

Ralphie the "Petite Kraken"

Physical Size

Microscopic

Story

Additional Locations

The Defamatory Masquerade

Rundown Palace

Fire Forge

Random Events

Druid Ignites violently

Crowd Catches leprosy

Reindeer Pulls on the coat tails of one of the adventurers

Bottle of Soy Sauce Is under a curse

World

Stores

Molly's Faberge Egg Atelier

Wilson's Metal chair Arcade

Cooper's Large book Beauty Stop

Nguyen's Fireplace Labs

Traps

Ice lock

Portcullis of Purity

Objects

Faberge Egg children's replica

Large book with a False bottom

Secret Metal chair

Hidden Spoon

File of Purity

Wand of Wonder

All within 50 yards are arrested for sedition and treason

People

Name Codename Career Likes Dislikes
Max Wilson "Italian Pretzels" Merchant Attention Tissues
Ellie Cooper "Nice Heels" Mole Rock n' Roll Lions
Cora Rose Judge Music Rocks
Molly West Flirty Trees Water
Ella Nguyen Plumber Honey Soccer

Cipher



                

                
 
                

                

                

                

                

                

The Fuck Is This?

After years of playing Dungeons & Dragons, I decided to make a variation where everything is improv. The DM knows as much as the players and you tell a story together - sitcom style. We use this site as a quest starter, think of some characters, and see how much we can make each other laugh.

It's designed to be simple, portable, and dependent on being creative & inventive. I wanted a framework to guide the plot forward but let us find the story. This page is just a guide to help the stories become too redundant - take as much as you want, ignore as much as you need. If you want to follow along with our adventures or read some examples, check out my personal story notes.

This concept and site was crafted by Andrew Maruska with linguistic help from Evan Stark

But how?

The Most Important Rule

Be Silly. The goal is to laugh not to have a normal adventure. Someone wants to go to the moon? Fuck yeah they do and we're going to do it with medieval technology.

Set Up

Give the players a home base, a year they want to play in, and some general ownership of the setup. It's more successful when everyone has helped create the world because when a player makes suggestions it's easier to integrate them without feeling too precious. It helps to have a figurehead that assigns the quest to authoritatively start.

Characters

90% of creating a character here is a funny voice you're forced to talk in for 3 hours. I typically have people pick one trait they want to be good at and give them a slight advantage when using that - and the same for a negative trait. Don't overcomplicate it. They wanna be a skateboarder who can't feel love? perfect. +2 to cool & -2 to social acceptance.

Rolling

This can be whatever you want but as a general rule I use d20's as a graded scale. Sometimes, I craft the roll to mimic the action i.e. if they are walking a tight rope then might need to roll a 10 because 20 & 1 make them fall to one side or the other. Rolling in D&D got boring so make it fun again.

Dungeon Master

Your goal is to say 'Yes and...' but realistically it's 'Yes and roll to see if you can actually do that triple backflip down the cliff to mount the attacking phoenix...' - It's okay to make them fail, just don't tell them no. This guide is to help you be 1 step ahead of the players but it can't know the vibe of the room, have some empathy and play to the crowd.

Ending

No one can tell you this. The guide is to help you get 1/3 of the adventure set up and the rest will be created by the adventuring party. Have fun with it and try to tie up some loose ends at the end (or don't and bring them back for another adventure).