The Director Welcomes You

Who is Jerry Prison?

#6ff4ed

Location

Dark, Dark Luxembourg

Time of Day

10:58

Extraction Point

136 Miles NWW

Time to Complete

16 Hours

Scrutinizers,
I have sent you to underneathe a Compact Private Jet plane to look for a suspect by the name "Little Imp". This mission is clandestine. Their recent activity is concerning and we need you to uncover their plans. We don't know much about their goals but we've intercepted this cryptic message – "An out of place door appears at the Three Fingers".

We're low budget this mission – I've packed a Sharp Boot in your kit to help.

— The Microsoft Zune you were holding self destructs.

The Villain Dossier

Name

Morris Craig

Alias

"Little Imp"

Features

4' 1"

Blue eyes

Large moles / Left arm

Organization

The Society of Mandatory Shaft

Emotions

Shocked

Personality

Voluntarily Powerful

Motive

Take over a government to become the best

Bodyguard

Jerry the "Slimey Python"

Physical Size

Microscopic

Story

Additional Locations

The Brave City

Underground Creek

Optimism Forge

Random Events

Odor Calls menacingly

Cauldron scurries by

Nearby Gas Tank strikes the ground

Alligator explodes

World

Stores

Adaline's Tapestry Specialities

Day's Bureau Unlimited

Mendez's Sofa Bureau

Reed's Letter Opener Couture

Traps

Acid Arrow

Lightning Bolt of Joy

Objects

Tapestry made of heavy metal

Sofa that is glowing

Secret Bureau

Hidden Bottle

Hatchet of Joy

Wand of Wonder

All within 50 yards must Save, or their wounds will never heal

People

Name Codename Career Likes Dislikes
Lucas Day "Obese Ankles" Merchant Death Whipped Cream
Emily Mendez "All Pastrami's" Mole Painting Boxes
Mackenzie Fischer Elder Essential Oils Dolphins
Adaline Leon Plumber Sailboats Limes
Hayden Reed Exhilarated Baseball Scarves

Cipher



                


                

                    
                    

                


                

                    
                    
 
                


                

                    
                    

                


                

                    
                    

                


                

                    
                    

                

                
                

                    
                    

                


                

                    
                    

                

              

            

          

        

      

    



    
      
      
 
        

          

            
The Fuck Is This?

          

          

            
            
After years of playing Dungeons & Dragons, I decided to make a variation where everything is improv. The DM knows as much as the players and you tell a story together - sitcom style. We use this site as a quest starter, think of some characters, and see how much we can make each other laugh.

            
            
It's designed to be simple, portable, and dependent on being creative & inventive. I wanted a framework to guide the plot forward but let us find the story. This page is just a guide to help the stories become too redundant - take as much as you want, ignore as much as you need. If you want to follow along with our adventures or read some examples, check out  my personal story notes.

            
            
This concept and site was crafted by Andrew Maruska with linguistic help from Evan Stark

          

        

      

    


    
      
      
 
        

          

            
But how?

          

          
            
            The Most Important Rule
            
Be Silly. The goal is to laugh not to have a normal adventure. Someone wants to go to the moon? Fuck yeah they do and we're going to do it with medieval technology.

            
            Set Up
            
Give the players a home base, a year they want to play in, and some general ownership of the setup. It's more successful when everyone has helped create the world because when a player makes suggestions it's easier to integrate them without feeling too precious. It helps to have a figurehead that assigns the quest to authoritatively start.

            
            Characters
            
90% of creating a character here is a funny voice you're forced to talk in for 3 hours. I typically have people pick one trait they want to be good at and give them a slight advantage when using that - and the same for a negative trait. Don't overcomplicate it. They wanna be a skateboarder who can't feel love? perfect. +2 to cool & -2 to social acceptance. 

            
            Rolling
            
This can be whatever you want but as a general rule I use d20's as a graded scale. Sometimes, I craft the roll to mimic the action i.e. if they are walking a tight rope then might need to roll a 10 because 20 & 1 make them fall to one side or the other. Rolling in D&D got boring so make it fun again. 

            
            Dungeon Master
            
Your goal is to say 'Yes and...' but realistically it's 'Yes and roll to see if you can actually do that triple backflip down the cliff to mount the attacking phoenix...' - It's okay to make them fail, just don't tell them no. This guide is to help you be 1 step ahead of the players but it can't know the vibe of the room, have some empathy and play to the crowd. 

            
            Ending
            
No one can tell you this. The guide is to help you get 1/3 of the adventure set up and the rest will be created by the adventuring party. Have fun with it and try to tie up some loose ends at the end (or don't and bring them back for another adventure).