The Director Welcomes You

Operation — Late Ghost

#345258

Location

Warm, Calm Marshall Islands

Time of Day

16:29

Extraction Point

120 Miles SEE

Time to Complete

34 Hours

Agents,
We need your help. Agent Jayce Hoffman has gone missing and we believe "Quiet Griffin" is responsible. They were last seen in Marshall Islands at 14:09. The agent sent one final message – "A mysterious key is found on the ground at the Beast's Maze". Take this Clandestine Apron - it was their favorite tool and might help you.

— The Tape recorder you were holding self destructs.

The Villain Dossier

Name

Anastasia Ortega

Alias

"Quiet Griffin"

Features

4' 4"

Heterochromia eyes

Small mole / Right leg

Organization

The League of Embarrassed Wiener

Emotions

Hurt

Personality

Worriedly Numerous

Motive

Take over a country out of survival

Bodyguard

Charles the "Swollen kobold"

Physical Size

Considerable

Story

Additional Locations

The Late Carnival

Underwater Shelter

Disaster Festival

Random Events

Dancer runs over an infant

Reindeer Is frozen into a block of ice

Crowd Is frozen into a block of ice

Turtle Attempts to rob a bank

World

Stores

Jude's crutch Hole

Gill's Doorway Beauty Stop

Cole's Crate Industries

Hoffman's Bookcase Arcade

Traps

Fireball

Swinging Block of Well-being

Objects

crutch made of heavy metal

Crate with a False bottom

Secret Doorway

Hidden Collar

Trident of Well-being

Wand of Wonder

Anyone touching the target in the next turn suffers severe burns

People

Name Codename Career Likes Dislikes
Elise Gill "Orange Bones" Merchant Whipped Cream Cellphones
Leilani Cole "Red Hot Dogs" Mole Sticks Baseball
Elena Russell Old Man Sharp Things Lipstick
Jude Cohen Meteorologist Bread Scarves
Jayce Hoffman Journalist Contracts Candy

Cipher



                

                
 
                

                

                

                

                

                

The Fuck Is This?

After years of playing Dungeons & Dragons, I decided to make a variation where everything is improv. The DM knows as much as the players and you tell a story together - sitcom style. We use this site as a quest starter, think of some characters, and see how much we can make each other laugh.

It's designed to be simple, portable, and dependent on being creative & inventive. I wanted a framework to guide the plot forward but let us find the story. This page is just a guide to help the stories become too redundant - take as much as you want, ignore as much as you need. If you want to follow along with our adventures or read some examples, check out my personal story notes.

This concept and site was crafted by Andrew Maruska with linguistic help from Evan Stark

But how?

The Most Important Rule

Be Silly. The goal is to laugh not to have a normal adventure. Someone wants to go to the moon? Fuck yeah they do and we're going to do it with medieval technology.

Set Up

Give the players a home base, a year they want to play in, and some general ownership of the setup. It's more successful when everyone has helped create the world because when a player makes suggestions it's easier to integrate them without feeling too precious. It helps to have a figurehead that assigns the quest to authoritatively start.

Characters

90% of creating a character here is a funny voice you're forced to talk in for 3 hours. I typically have people pick one trait they want to be good at and give them a slight advantage when using that - and the same for a negative trait. Don't overcomplicate it. They wanna be a skateboarder who can't feel love? perfect. +2 to cool & -2 to social acceptance.

Rolling

This can be whatever you want but as a general rule I use d20's as a graded scale. Sometimes, I craft the roll to mimic the action i.e. if they are walking a tight rope then might need to roll a 10 because 20 & 1 make them fall to one side or the other. Rolling in D&D got boring so make it fun again.

Dungeon Master

Your goal is to say 'Yes and...' but realistically it's 'Yes and roll to see if you can actually do that triple backflip down the cliff to mount the attacking phoenix...' - It's okay to make them fail, just don't tell them no. This guide is to help you be 1 step ahead of the players but it can't know the vibe of the room, have some empathy and play to the crowd.

Ending

No one can tell you this. The guide is to help you get 1/3 of the adventure set up and the rest will be created by the adventuring party. Have fun with it and try to tie up some loose ends at the end (or don't and bring them back for another adventure).