The Director Welcomes You

Operation — Great Teeth

#225591

Location

Arid, Cloudy Djibouti

Time of Day

6:12

Extraction Point

28 Miles NW

Time to Complete

33 Hours

Scrutinizers,
As you can see you are trapped inside be locked inside of a Polluted Port . We almost couldn't find you — Please explain when you get back. All we know is "White Pheonix" is responsible and they sent us this message - "A stranger can be seen in the shadows at the Broken Face". Your mission was anti-surveillance, achieve what you can.

Hopefully you still have that Explosive Hot Glue Gun hidden on you.

— The Tinder Date you were holding self destructs.

The Villain Dossier

Name

Ashley Cunningham

Alias

"White Pheonix"

Features

5' 8"

Brown eyes

Faint curved scar / Right thumb

Organization

The Unit of Garrulous Scotch

Emotions

Trusting

Personality

Mysteriously Victorious

Motive

Take over a government for fear of the heroes

Bodyguard

Jerry the "Faint Worm"

Physical Size

Microscopic

Story

Additional Locations

The Great Pond

Rundown Barn Dance

Fragility Maze

Random Events

Husband Strikes the church bell

Demon Integrates silently into the group

Deadbeat catches on fire

Rhapsody overflows

World

Stores

Easton's Cabinet Brothers

Paul's Skeletal Animal International

Richards's Vanity Consulting

Rogers's Bench Emporium

Traps

Large Net

Floor Net of Expiration

Objects

Cabinet with a False bottom

Vanity with a False bottom

Secret Skeletal Animal

Hidden Glasses

Camera of Expiration

Wand of Wonder

The entire area is thickly shrouded by dust and cobwebs

People

Name Codename Career Likes Dislikes
Aiden Paul "Right Livers" Merchant Sharp Things Paper
Annabelle Richards "Wild Bagels" Mole Washing Machines Writers
Amy Obrien Waiter Coffee Stickers
Easton Davidson Optimistic Horses Paper
Raelynn Rogers Cobbler Coffee Dinosaurs

Cipher



                

                
 
                

                

                

                

                

                

The Fuck Is This?

After years of playing Dungeons & Dragons, I decided to make a variation where everything is improv. The DM knows as much as the players and you tell a story together - sitcom style. We use this site as a quest starter, think of some characters, and see how much we can make each other laugh.

It's designed to be simple, portable, and dependent on being creative & inventive. I wanted a framework to guide the plot forward but let us find the story. This page is just a guide to help the stories become too redundant - take as much as you want, ignore as much as you need. If you want to follow along with our adventures or read some examples, check out my personal story notes.

This concept and site was crafted by Andrew Maruska with linguistic help from Evan Stark

But how?

The Most Important Rule

Be Silly. The goal is to laugh not to have a normal adventure. Someone wants to go to the moon? Fuck yeah they do and we're going to do it with medieval technology.

Set Up

Give the players a home base, a year they want to play in, and some general ownership of the setup. It's more successful when everyone has helped create the world because when a player makes suggestions it's easier to integrate them without feeling too precious. It helps to have a figurehead that assigns the quest to authoritatively start.

Characters

90% of creating a character here is a funny voice you're forced to talk in for 3 hours. I typically have people pick one trait they want to be good at and give them a slight advantage when using that - and the same for a negative trait. Don't overcomplicate it. They wanna be a skateboarder who can't feel love? perfect. +2 to cool & -2 to social acceptance.

Rolling

This can be whatever you want but as a general rule I use d20's as a graded scale. Sometimes, I craft the roll to mimic the action i.e. if they are walking a tight rope then might need to roll a 10 because 20 & 1 make them fall to one side or the other. Rolling in D&D got boring so make it fun again.

Dungeon Master

Your goal is to say 'Yes and...' but realistically it's 'Yes and roll to see if you can actually do that triple backflip down the cliff to mount the attacking phoenix...' - It's okay to make them fail, just don't tell them no. This guide is to help you be 1 step ahead of the players but it can't know the vibe of the room, have some empathy and play to the crowd.

Ending

No one can tell you this. The guide is to help you get 1/3 of the adventure set up and the rest will be created by the adventuring party. Have fun with it and try to tie up some loose ends at the end (or don't and bring them back for another adventure).