The Director Welcomes You

Operation — Dusty Boyscouts

#f5b34d

Location

Icy, Hot Togo

Time of Day

1:3

Extraction Point

16 Miles S

Time to Complete

45 Hours

Spy Deputies,
It seems "King Anteaters" has gone level 6. They have been broadcasting this message "Tracks of wolves can be seen at the Three Fingers". We need you to eliminate them, Strictly. Their last known location was recorded at 15:19. You have a Explosive Baking Tray as a last resort. Use carefully.

— The Tablet of Stone you were holding self destructs.

The Villain Dossier

Name

Avery Patterson

Alias

"King Anteaters"

Features

7' 6"

Green eyes

Stretch Marks / Left thumb

Organization

The company of Steep Disgust

Emotions

Hopeless

Personality

Strictly Prehistoric

Motive

Make a lot of money to better Humanity

Bodyguard

Sam the "Itchy Cat"

Physical Size

Colossal

Story

Additional Locations

The Dusty Sanctuary

Rundown Jungle

Cheer Lodge

Random Events

Delivery Guy grabs a lady's purse

Corncob Spontaneously disintegrates

Dracula overflows

Musical emerges

World

Stores

Alice's Trunk Atelier

Washington's Butter Churner Mall

Sherman's Sconce Group

Gardner's End Table Beauty Stop

Traps

Razor-Wire across Hallway

Acid Fog of Joy

Objects

Trunk children's replica

Sconce with a False bottom

Secret Butter Churner

Hidden Wrench

Katana of Joy

Wand of Wonder

If caster is carrying food, it’s 4X as nutritious as normal food

People

Name Codename Career Likes Dislikes
Matthew Washington "Five Arms" Merchant Video Games Paper
Raelynn Sherman "Big Bones" Mole Broccoli Video Games
Eliza Jimenez Drunken Sharks Glitter
Alice Carroll Animator Horses Ice Cubes
Tristan Gardner Railroad Conductor Essential Oils Attention

Cipher



                

                
 
                

                

                

                

                

                

The Fuck Is This?

After years of playing Dungeons & Dragons, I decided to make a variation where everything is improv. The DM knows as much as the players and you tell a story together - sitcom style. We use this site as a quest starter, think of some characters, and see how much we can make each other laugh.

It's designed to be simple, portable, and dependent on being creative & inventive. I wanted a framework to guide the plot forward but let us find the story. This page is just a guide to help the stories become too redundant - take as much as you want, ignore as much as you need. If you want to follow along with our adventures or read some examples, check out my personal story notes.

This concept and site was crafted by Andrew Maruska with linguistic help from Evan Stark

But how?

The Most Important Rule

Be Silly. The goal is to laugh not to have a normal adventure. Someone wants to go to the moon? Fuck yeah they do and we're going to do it with medieval technology.

Set Up

Give the players a home base, a year they want to play in, and some general ownership of the setup. It's more successful when everyone has helped create the world because when a player makes suggestions it's easier to integrate them without feeling too precious. It helps to have a figurehead that assigns the quest to authoritatively start.

Characters

90% of creating a character here is a funny voice you're forced to talk in for 3 hours. I typically have people pick one trait they want to be good at and give them a slight advantage when using that - and the same for a negative trait. Don't overcomplicate it. They wanna be a skateboarder who can't feel love? perfect. +2 to cool & -2 to social acceptance.

Rolling

This can be whatever you want but as a general rule I use d20's as a graded scale. Sometimes, I craft the roll to mimic the action i.e. if they are walking a tight rope then might need to roll a 10 because 20 & 1 make them fall to one side or the other. Rolling in D&D got boring so make it fun again.

Dungeon Master

Your goal is to say 'Yes and...' but realistically it's 'Yes and roll to see if you can actually do that triple backflip down the cliff to mount the attacking phoenix...' - It's okay to make them fail, just don't tell them no. This guide is to help you be 1 step ahead of the players but it can't know the vibe of the room, have some empathy and play to the crowd.

Ending

No one can tell you this. The guide is to help you get 1/3 of the adventure set up and the rest will be created by the adventuring party. Have fun with it and try to tie up some loose ends at the end (or don't and bring them back for another adventure).