The Director Welcomes You

Bacon, Cash, Troll, Spy.

#5a41a7

Location

Mild, Gloomy Djibouti

Time of Day

16:28

Extraction Point

88 Miles S

Time to Complete

12 Hours

Detectives,
As you can see you are trapped inside the outside of a Ancient Jungle . We almost couldn't find you — Please explain when you get back. All we know is "Chunky Goblins" is responsible and they sent us this message - "A shadow passes at the Fallen King". Your mission was black bag, achieve what you can.

Hopefully you still have that Sharp Purse hidden on you.

— The Tablet of Stone you were holding self destructs.

The Villain Dossier

Name

Avery Cortez

Alias

"Chunky Goblins"

Features

6' 7"

Blue eyes

Stretch Marks / Left middle finger

Organization

The Office of Fancy Troll

Emotions

Fondness

Personality

Broadly Sturdy

Motive

Take over a government because of grief and loss

Bodyguard

Nicky the "Mysterious Pig"

Physical Size

Adult

Story

Additional Locations

The Tasteless Isle

Polluted Mansion

Delirium Fortress

Random Events

Rustler Is getting confiscated

Alligator Ignites violently

Soup Is being detained

Fairy Becomes wounded

World

Stores

Faith's Fire poker set Productions

Blair's Paperweight Hole

Hanson's Portrait Convenience store

Cortez's Brass Replica Atelier

Traps

Lightning Bolt

Built-to-Collapse Wall of Censorship

Objects

Fire poker set made of heavy metal

Portrait children's replica

Secret Paperweight

Hidden Diary

Button of Censorship

Wand of Wonder

Someone nearby is revealed to be of demonic heritage

People

Name Codename Career Likes Dislikes
Callie Blair "Right Tongues" Merchant Eggs Slippers
Dylan Hanson "Nice Lungs" Mole Fire Lions
Sawyer Vega Professional Bridesmaid Sticky Notes Candy
Faith Byrd Butcher Stickers Doves
Ian Cortez Soul Tissues Notes

Cipher



                

                
 
                

                

                

                

                

                

The Fuck Is This?

After years of playing Dungeons & Dragons, I decided to make a variation where everything is improv. The DM knows as much as the players and you tell a story together - sitcom style. We use this site as a quest starter, think of some characters, and see how much we can make each other laugh.

It's designed to be simple, portable, and dependent on being creative & inventive. I wanted a framework to guide the plot forward but let us find the story. This page is just a guide to help the stories become too redundant - take as much as you want, ignore as much as you need. If you want to follow along with our adventures or read some examples, check out my personal story notes.

This concept and site was crafted by Andrew Maruska with linguistic help from Evan Stark

But how?

The Most Important Rule

Be Silly. The goal is to laugh not to have a normal adventure. Someone wants to go to the moon? Fuck yeah they do and we're going to do it with medieval technology.

Set Up

Give the players a home base, a year they want to play in, and some general ownership of the setup. It's more successful when everyone has helped create the world because when a player makes suggestions it's easier to integrate them without feeling too precious. It helps to have a figurehead that assigns the quest to authoritatively start.

Characters

90% of creating a character here is a funny voice you're forced to talk in for 3 hours. I typically have people pick one trait they want to be good at and give them a slight advantage when using that - and the same for a negative trait. Don't overcomplicate it. They wanna be a skateboarder who can't feel love? perfect. +2 to cool & -2 to social acceptance.

Rolling

This can be whatever you want but as a general rule I use d20's as a graded scale. Sometimes, I craft the roll to mimic the action i.e. if they are walking a tight rope then might need to roll a 10 because 20 & 1 make them fall to one side or the other. Rolling in D&D got boring so make it fun again.

Dungeon Master

Your goal is to say 'Yes and...' but realistically it's 'Yes and roll to see if you can actually do that triple backflip down the cliff to mount the attacking phoenix...' - It's okay to make them fail, just don't tell them no. This guide is to help you be 1 step ahead of the players but it can't know the vibe of the room, have some empathy and play to the crowd.

Ending

No one can tell you this. The guide is to help you get 1/3 of the adventure set up and the rest will be created by the adventuring party. Have fun with it and try to tie up some loose ends at the end (or don't and bring them back for another adventure).