The Director Welcomes You

Beauty Stop Royale

#4dfeed

Location

Humid, Rainy Qatar

Time of Day

23:30

Extraction Point

49 Miles NE

Time to Complete

39 Hours

Silent Negotiators,
As you can see you are trapped inside fly above a Rundown Grove . We almost couldn't find you — Please explain when you get back. All we know is "The Aardvark" is responsible and they sent us this message - "The group finds a dead fish at the old bridge". Your mission was intelligence, achieve what you can.

Hopefully you still have that Evil Ladder hidden on you.

— The Vinyl record player you were holding self destructs.

The Villain Dossier

Name

Hudson Vasquez

Alias

"The Aardvark"

Features

4' 2"

Hazel eyes

Large deep scar / Left leg

Organization

The Task Force of Sticky Tricycle

Emotions

Compassionate

Personality

Fiercely Worn

Motive

Take over a country because of a betrayal

Bodyguard

Jerry the "Portly Pegasus"

Physical Size

Mini

Story

Additional Locations

The Crashing Spring

Hidden Festival

Annihilation Park

Random Events

Chauvinist Balances on a ledge

Milk Shipment Spontaneously disintegrates

Corncob Is accused by the law

Druid stop the party and asks questions

World

Stores

Lydia's Shirt Beauty Stop

Campbell's Telescope Market

Jordan's Bench Creative

Berry's Pedestal Bazaar

Traps

Portcullis

Lightning Bolt of Destruction

Objects

Shirt with a False bottom

Bench children's replica

Secret Telescope

Hidden Greaves

Staff of Destruction

Wand of Wonder

Tomorrow, caster wakes with mysterious tattoos all over his body

People

Name Codename Career Likes Dislikes
Rowan Campbell "Slow Lox" Merchant Children's Stories Chickens
Oliver Jordan "Five Fingers" Mole Music Bells
Ryleigh Hall Soul Slippers Lions
Lydia Brooks Musician Flowers Video Games
Ian Berry Sad Children's Stories Honey

Cipher



                

                
 
                

                

                

                

                

                

The Fuck Is This?

After years of playing Dungeons & Dragons, I decided to make a variation where everything is improv. The DM knows as much as the players and you tell a story together - sitcom style. We use this site as a quest starter, think of some characters, and see how much we can make each other laugh.

It's designed to be simple, portable, and dependent on being creative & inventive. I wanted a framework to guide the plot forward but let us find the story. This page is just a guide to help the stories become too redundant - take as much as you want, ignore as much as you need. If you want to follow along with our adventures or read some examples, check out my personal story notes.

This concept and site was crafted by Andrew Maruska with linguistic help from Evan Stark

But how?

The Most Important Rule

Be Silly. The goal is to laugh not to have a normal adventure. Someone wants to go to the moon? Fuck yeah they do and we're going to do it with medieval technology.

Set Up

Give the players a home base, a year they want to play in, and some general ownership of the setup. It's more successful when everyone has helped create the world because when a player makes suggestions it's easier to integrate them without feeling too precious. It helps to have a figurehead that assigns the quest to authoritatively start.

Characters

90% of creating a character here is a funny voice you're forced to talk in for 3 hours. I typically have people pick one trait they want to be good at and give them a slight advantage when using that - and the same for a negative trait. Don't overcomplicate it. They wanna be a skateboarder who can't feel love? perfect. +2 to cool & -2 to social acceptance.

Rolling

This can be whatever you want but as a general rule I use d20's as a graded scale. Sometimes, I craft the roll to mimic the action i.e. if they are walking a tight rope then might need to roll a 10 because 20 & 1 make them fall to one side or the other. Rolling in D&D got boring so make it fun again.

Dungeon Master

Your goal is to say 'Yes and...' but realistically it's 'Yes and roll to see if you can actually do that triple backflip down the cliff to mount the attacking phoenix...' - It's okay to make them fail, just don't tell them no. This guide is to help you be 1 step ahead of the players but it can't know the vibe of the room, have some empathy and play to the crowd.

Ending

No one can tell you this. The guide is to help you get 1/3 of the adventure set up and the rest will be created by the adventuring party. Have fun with it and try to tie up some loose ends at the end (or don't and bring them back for another adventure).