The Director Welcomes You

Who is George Engine?

#702df6

Location

Breezy, Calm Denmark

Time of Day

17:0

Extraction Point

106 Miles SEE

Time to Complete

1 Hours

Silent Negotiators,
It seems "Tough potato" has gone level 5. They have been broadcasting this message "A black cat runs past at the Boneyard". We need you to eliminate them, Generously. Their last known location was recorded at 08:11. You have a Colorful Ladder as a last resort. Use carefully.

— The Origami Swan you were holding self destructs.

The Villain Dossier

Name

Quinn Weaver

Alias

"Tough potato"

Features

7' 6"

Blue eyes

Stretch Marks / Right eye

Organization

The Department of Gentle Secretary

Emotions

Interested

Personality

Generously Incendiary

Motive

Take over a country for fear of the heroes

Bodyguard

George the "Faint Pegasus"

Physical Size

Gigantic

Story

Additional Locations

The Slimey Arcade

Overpopulated Forest

Expiration Sanctuary

Random Events

Nomad Evades the law

Horse Carriage Catches leprosy

Bottle of Soy Sauce Evades the law

Delivery Guy is heard screaming

World

Stores

Malachi's Notebook Labs

Norris's Rug Bureau

Lucas's Fireplace Consulting

Sutton's Bell Labs

Traps

Acid Fog

Flame Strike of Bitterness

Objects

Notebook that is glowing

Fireplace that is glowing

Secret Rug

Hidden Shoe

Spoon of Bitterness

Wand of Wonder

Anyone cutting target with a blade vanishes for 1d4 rounds

People

Name Codename Career Likes Dislikes
Taylor Norris "Wild Arms" Merchant Scarves Scarves
Brayden Lucas "Obese Lox" Mole Chalk Cats
Brielle Miranda Soul Soup Cousins
Malachi Henry Envious Writers Rubber Stamps
Thomas Sutton Phantom Writers Contracts

Cipher



                

                
 
                

                

                

                

                

                

The Fuck Is This?

After years of playing Dungeons & Dragons, I decided to make a variation where everything is improv. The DM knows as much as the players and you tell a story together - sitcom style. We use this site as a quest starter, think of some characters, and see how much we can make each other laugh.

It's designed to be simple, portable, and dependent on being creative & inventive. I wanted a framework to guide the plot forward but let us find the story. This page is just a guide to help the stories become too redundant - take as much as you want, ignore as much as you need. If you want to follow along with our adventures or read some examples, check out my personal story notes.

This concept and site was crafted by Andrew Maruska with linguistic help from Evan Stark

But how?

The Most Important Rule

Be Silly. The goal is to laugh not to have a normal adventure. Someone wants to go to the moon? Fuck yeah they do and we're going to do it with medieval technology.

Set Up

Give the players a home base, a year they want to play in, and some general ownership of the setup. It's more successful when everyone has helped create the world because when a player makes suggestions it's easier to integrate them without feeling too precious. It helps to have a figurehead that assigns the quest to authoritatively start.

Characters

90% of creating a character here is a funny voice you're forced to talk in for 3 hours. I typically have people pick one trait they want to be good at and give them a slight advantage when using that - and the same for a negative trait. Don't overcomplicate it. They wanna be a skateboarder who can't feel love? perfect. +2 to cool & -2 to social acceptance.

Rolling

This can be whatever you want but as a general rule I use d20's as a graded scale. Sometimes, I craft the roll to mimic the action i.e. if they are walking a tight rope then might need to roll a 10 because 20 & 1 make them fall to one side or the other. Rolling in D&D got boring so make it fun again.

Dungeon Master

Your goal is to say 'Yes and...' but realistically it's 'Yes and roll to see if you can actually do that triple backflip down the cliff to mount the attacking phoenix...' - It's okay to make them fail, just don't tell them no. This guide is to help you be 1 step ahead of the players but it can't know the vibe of the room, have some empathy and play to the crowd.

Ending

No one can tell you this. The guide is to help you get 1/3 of the adventure set up and the rest will be created by the adventuring party. Have fun with it and try to tie up some loose ends at the end (or don't and bring them back for another adventure).