The Director Welcomes You

Spike, Women, Ring, Spy.

#b93d88

Location

Dull, Mild Myanmar

Time of Day

19:34

Extraction Point

164 Miles NW

Time to Complete

13 Hours

Operatives,
This week should be easy. You are delivering a Medallion that has been hollowed out. Get to Myanmar at 12:12

Good Luck.

— The Messenger Pigeon you were holding self destructs.

The Villain Dossier

Name

Richard Wallace

Alias

"Right Gargoyle"

Features

4' 5"

Heterochromia eyes

Large deep scar / Left middle finger

Organization

The Sisterhood of Strungout Ring

Emotions

Compassionate

Personality

Solemnly Petite

Motive

Take over a country for pure destruction

Bodyguard

Harrison the "Annoying mammoth"

Physical Size

Miniature

Story

Additional Locations

The Depressed House

Pitch Black Mansion

Cleanliness Creek

Random Events

Turtle Finds gold in the water

Husband Adopts a nearby child

Alligator arrives in the mail

Vagrant Skips merrily

World

Stores

Carson's Medallion Cosmetics

Duncan's Satchel Unlimited

Todd's Armoir Labs

Torres's Stool Technologies

Traps

Scything Blade

Camouflaged Pit of Extinction

Objects

Medallion that has been hollowed out

Armoir that has been hollowed out

Secret Satchel

Hidden Shield

Axe of Extinction

Wand of Wonder

Target is suddenly standing atop the nearest sand dune

People

Name Codename Career Likes Dislikes
Callie Duncan "Indigo Feet" Merchant Sticks Christmas
Amy Todd "Wild Thumbs" Mole Stickers Television
Trinity Figueroa Operator Tigers Broccoli
Carson Daniels Exhausted Rubber Bands Robots
Luis Torres Judge Honey Books

Cipher



                

                
 
                

                

                

                

                

                

The Fuck Is This?

After years of playing Dungeons & Dragons, I decided to make a variation where everything is improv. The DM knows as much as the players and you tell a story together - sitcom style. We use this site as a quest starter, think of some characters, and see how much we can make each other laugh.

It's designed to be simple, portable, and dependent on being creative & inventive. I wanted a framework to guide the plot forward but let us find the story. This page is just a guide to help the stories become too redundant - take as much as you want, ignore as much as you need. If you want to follow along with our adventures or read some examples, check out my personal story notes.

This concept and site was crafted by Andrew Maruska with linguistic help from Evan Stark

But how?

The Most Important Rule

Be Silly. The goal is to laugh not to have a normal adventure. Someone wants to go to the moon? Fuck yeah they do and we're going to do it with medieval technology.

Set Up

Give the players a home base, a year they want to play in, and some general ownership of the setup. It's more successful when everyone has helped create the world because when a player makes suggestions it's easier to integrate them without feeling too precious. It helps to have a figurehead that assigns the quest to authoritatively start.

Characters

90% of creating a character here is a funny voice you're forced to talk in for 3 hours. I typically have people pick one trait they want to be good at and give them a slight advantage when using that - and the same for a negative trait. Don't overcomplicate it. They wanna be a skateboarder who can't feel love? perfect. +2 to cool & -2 to social acceptance.

Rolling

This can be whatever you want but as a general rule I use d20's as a graded scale. Sometimes, I craft the roll to mimic the action i.e. if they are walking a tight rope then might need to roll a 10 because 20 & 1 make them fall to one side or the other. Rolling in D&D got boring so make it fun again.

Dungeon Master

Your goal is to say 'Yes and...' but realistically it's 'Yes and roll to see if you can actually do that triple backflip down the cliff to mount the attacking phoenix...' - It's okay to make them fail, just don't tell them no. This guide is to help you be 1 step ahead of the players but it can't know the vibe of the room, have some empathy and play to the crowd.

Ending

No one can tell you this. The guide is to help you get 1/3 of the adventure set up and the rest will be created by the adventuring party. Have fun with it and try to tie up some loose ends at the end (or don't and bring them back for another adventure).