The Director Welcomes You

Specialities Royale

#b24cab

Location

Warm, Dull Comoros

Time of Day

17:16

Extraction Point

163 Miles E

Time to Complete

34 Hours

Agents,
This week should be easy. You are delivering a Fireplace that has been hollowed out. Get to Comoros at 16:19

Good Luck.

— The Microsoft Zune you were holding self destructs.

The Villain Dossier

Name

Lily Rivera

Alias

"Blue Golem"

Features

5' 8"

Hazel eyes

Large moles / Left eye

Organization

The Society of Yellow Twins

Emotions

Scared

Personality

Promptly Curved

Motive

Take over a government justice for a wrong-doing

Bodyguard

James the "Good Gargoyle"

Physical Size

Full-grown

Story

Additional Locations

The Panicky Port

Archaic Acropolis

Power Jungle

Random Events

Bag of Flour Is getting confiscated

Box of Cigarette Protests

Spice Box Is being kidnapped

Hoard approaches

World

Stores

Anthony's Fireplace Specialities

Adkins's Crate Mall

Carrillo's Cabinet Labs

Reynolds's crutch Factory

Traps

Arrow

Floor Net of Grave Consequences

Objects

Fireplace that has been hollowed out

Cabinet that is glowing

Secret Crate

Hidden Throwing Dart

Guthook of Grave Consequences

Wand of Wonder

One random sword nearby is razor-sharp and indestructible

People

Name Codename Career Likes Dislikes
Braxton Adkins "Mad Tongues" Merchant Mirrors Rubber Stamps
Leo Carrillo "Green Knuckles" Mole Cooking Video Games
Timothy Vasquez Accountant Gym Memberships Scarves
Anthony Powers Spirit Chalk Sharp Things
Jeremy Reynolds Waiter Cooking Scarves

Cipher



                

                
 
                

                

                

                

                

                

The Fuck Is This?

After years of playing Dungeons & Dragons, I decided to make a variation where everything is improv. The DM knows as much as the players and you tell a story together - sitcom style. We use this site as a quest starter, think of some characters, and see how much we can make each other laugh.

It's designed to be simple, portable, and dependent on being creative & inventive. I wanted a framework to guide the plot forward but let us find the story. This page is just a guide to help the stories become too redundant - take as much as you want, ignore as much as you need. If you want to follow along with our adventures or read some examples, check out my personal story notes.

This concept and site was crafted by Andrew Maruska with linguistic help from Evan Stark

But how?

The Most Important Rule

Be Silly. The goal is to laugh not to have a normal adventure. Someone wants to go to the moon? Fuck yeah they do and we're going to do it with medieval technology.

Set Up

Give the players a home base, a year they want to play in, and some general ownership of the setup. It's more successful when everyone has helped create the world because when a player makes suggestions it's easier to integrate them without feeling too precious. It helps to have a figurehead that assigns the quest to authoritatively start.

Characters

90% of creating a character here is a funny voice you're forced to talk in for 3 hours. I typically have people pick one trait they want to be good at and give them a slight advantage when using that - and the same for a negative trait. Don't overcomplicate it. They wanna be a skateboarder who can't feel love? perfect. +2 to cool & -2 to social acceptance.

Rolling

This can be whatever you want but as a general rule I use d20's as a graded scale. Sometimes, I craft the roll to mimic the action i.e. if they are walking a tight rope then might need to roll a 10 because 20 & 1 make them fall to one side or the other. Rolling in D&D got boring so make it fun again.

Dungeon Master

Your goal is to say 'Yes and...' but realistically it's 'Yes and roll to see if you can actually do that triple backflip down the cliff to mount the attacking phoenix...' - It's okay to make them fail, just don't tell them no. This guide is to help you be 1 step ahead of the players but it can't know the vibe of the room, have some empathy and play to the crowd.

Ending

No one can tell you this. The guide is to help you get 1/3 of the adventure set up and the rest will be created by the adventuring party. Have fun with it and try to tie up some loose ends at the end (or don't and bring them back for another adventure).