The Director Welcomes You

The Verbally Fierce Agent

#69d132

Location

Gloomy, Foggy Brazil

Time of Day

3:34

Extraction Point

111 Miles SEE

Time to Complete

6 Hours

Ambassadors,
We need your help. Agent Sherri Martinez has gone missing and we believe "The starfish" is responsible. They were last seen in Brazil at 09:19. The agent sent one final message – "The group finds a dead fish at the Eye of Heaven". Take this Delicate Blanket - it was their favorite tool and might help you.

— The Microsoft Zune you were holding self destructs.

The Villain Dossier

Name

Valentina Lloyd

Alias

"The starfish"

Features

4' 11"

Amber eyes

Small mole / Left middle finger

Organization

The Department of Surly Upper Management

Emotions

Love

Personality

Verbally Tender

Motive

Take over a country out of survival

Bodyguard

Alex the "Zealous Goblins"

Physical Size

Considerable

Story

Additional Locations

The Fierce Castle

Pitch Black Suburbs

Delight Villa

Random Events

Odor Is being detained

Biscuit Bounces oddly

Donkey Is accused by the law

Milk Shipment Evades the law

World

Stores

Michelle's Flowers Growing Bureau

Navarro's Large book Arcade

Fleming's Mural Closet

Martinez's Hat Arcade

Traps

Lightning Bolt

Fireball of Euphoria

Objects

Flowers Growing that has been hollowed out

Mural children's replica

Secret Large book

Hidden Scimitar

Rapier of Euphoria

Wand of Wonder

Caster’s ears bleed harmlessly but copiously for 10d10 rounds

People

Name Codename Career Likes Dislikes
Lillian Navarro "Casual Hot Dogs" Merchant Octopus Broccoli
Wyatt Fleming "Orange Ankles" Mole Horses Sharp Things
Juliana Ray Ghost Butterflies Essential Oils
Michelle Norris Human Statue Gym Memberships Gym Memberships
Sherri Martinez Psychiatrist Socks Contracts

Cipher



                

                
 
                

                

                

                

                

                

The Fuck Is This?

After years of playing Dungeons & Dragons, I decided to make a variation where everything is improv. The DM knows as much as the players and you tell a story together - sitcom style. We use this site as a quest starter, think of some characters, and see how much we can make each other laugh.

It's designed to be simple, portable, and dependent on being creative & inventive. I wanted a framework to guide the plot forward but let us find the story. This page is just a guide to help the stories become too redundant - take as much as you want, ignore as much as you need. If you want to follow along with our adventures or read some examples, check out my personal story notes.

This concept and site was crafted by Andrew Maruska with linguistic help from Evan Stark

But how?

The Most Important Rule

Be Silly. The goal is to laugh not to have a normal adventure. Someone wants to go to the moon? Fuck yeah they do and we're going to do it with medieval technology.

Set Up

Give the players a home base, a year they want to play in, and some general ownership of the setup. It's more successful when everyone has helped create the world because when a player makes suggestions it's easier to integrate them without feeling too precious. It helps to have a figurehead that assigns the quest to authoritatively start.

Characters

90% of creating a character here is a funny voice you're forced to talk in for 3 hours. I typically have people pick one trait they want to be good at and give them a slight advantage when using that - and the same for a negative trait. Don't overcomplicate it. They wanna be a skateboarder who can't feel love? perfect. +2 to cool & -2 to social acceptance.

Rolling

This can be whatever you want but as a general rule I use d20's as a graded scale. Sometimes, I craft the roll to mimic the action i.e. if they are walking a tight rope then might need to roll a 10 because 20 & 1 make them fall to one side or the other. Rolling in D&D got boring so make it fun again.

Dungeon Master

Your goal is to say 'Yes and...' but realistically it's 'Yes and roll to see if you can actually do that triple backflip down the cliff to mount the attacking phoenix...' - It's okay to make them fail, just don't tell them no. This guide is to help you be 1 step ahead of the players but it can't know the vibe of the room, have some empathy and play to the crowd.

Ending

No one can tell you this. The guide is to help you get 1/3 of the adventure set up and the rest will be created by the adventuring party. Have fun with it and try to tie up some loose ends at the end (or don't and bring them back for another adventure).