The Director Welcomes You

Parking Lot, Vein, Bird Law, Spy.

#0eff92

Location

Cloudless, Mild Algeria

Time of Day

22:36

Extraction Point

197 Miles N

Time to Complete

42 Hours

Spy Deputies,
This week should be easy. You are delivering a Quill and Ink children's replica. Get to Algeria at 04:11

Good Luck.

— The Microsoft Zune you were holding self destructs.

The Villain Dossier

Name

Rhett Manning

Alias

"Slow Normal Guy"

Features

5' 5"

Hazel eyes

Stretch Marks / Left thumb

Organization

The Fraternity of Extensive Bird Law

Emotions

Defeated

Personality

Openly Clumsy

Motive

Make a lot of money for revenge

Bodyguard

Billy the "Raw potato"

Physical Size

Great

Story

Additional Locations

The Famous Acropolis

Crowded Jungle

Joy Spring

Random Events

Softball Adopts a nearby child

Wedding Cake Strikes the church bell

Rustler Salutes the adventurers

Alligator Calls menacingly

World

Stores

Aubrey's Quill and Ink Couture

Hamilton's Barrel Chic Chåteau

Ford's Vanity Supermarket

Bush's Trunk Logistics

Traps

Reverse Gravity

Poison Wall Spikes of Joy

Objects

Quill and Ink children's replica

Vanity that has been hollowed out

Secret Barrel

Hidden Gauntlet

Watch of Joy

Wand of Wonder

Caster’s face turns to wood

People

Name Codename Career Likes Dislikes
Amelia Hamilton "Two Dumplings" Merchant Pillows Lions
Catherine Ford "Fat Matzo Balls" Mole Candy Jigsaw Puzzles
Paige Flores Depressed Robots Glass
Aubrey Henry Surveyor Broccoli Ice Cubes
Willow Bush Fortune Cookie Writer Harmonica Fire

Cipher



                

                
 
                

                

                

                

                

                

The Fuck Is This?

After years of playing Dungeons & Dragons, I decided to make a variation where everything is improv. The DM knows as much as the players and you tell a story together - sitcom style. We use this site as a quest starter, think of some characters, and see how much we can make each other laugh.

It's designed to be simple, portable, and dependent on being creative & inventive. I wanted a framework to guide the plot forward but let us find the story. This page is just a guide to help the stories become too redundant - take as much as you want, ignore as much as you need. If you want to follow along with our adventures or read some examples, check out my personal story notes.

This concept and site was crafted by Andrew Maruska with linguistic help from Evan Stark

But how?

The Most Important Rule

Be Silly. The goal is to laugh not to have a normal adventure. Someone wants to go to the moon? Fuck yeah they do and we're going to do it with medieval technology.

Set Up

Give the players a home base, a year they want to play in, and some general ownership of the setup. It's more successful when everyone has helped create the world because when a player makes suggestions it's easier to integrate them without feeling too precious. It helps to have a figurehead that assigns the quest to authoritatively start.

Characters

90% of creating a character here is a funny voice you're forced to talk in for 3 hours. I typically have people pick one trait they want to be good at and give them a slight advantage when using that - and the same for a negative trait. Don't overcomplicate it. They wanna be a skateboarder who can't feel love? perfect. +2 to cool & -2 to social acceptance.

Rolling

This can be whatever you want but as a general rule I use d20's as a graded scale. Sometimes, I craft the roll to mimic the action i.e. if they are walking a tight rope then might need to roll a 10 because 20 & 1 make them fall to one side or the other. Rolling in D&D got boring so make it fun again.

Dungeon Master

Your goal is to say 'Yes and...' but realistically it's 'Yes and roll to see if you can actually do that triple backflip down the cliff to mount the attacking phoenix...' - It's okay to make them fail, just don't tell them no. This guide is to help you be 1 step ahead of the players but it can't know the vibe of the room, have some empathy and play to the crowd.

Ending

No one can tell you this. The guide is to help you get 1/3 of the adventure set up and the rest will be created by the adventuring party. Have fun with it and try to tie up some loose ends at the end (or don't and bring them back for another adventure).