The Director Welcomes You

Operation — Beautiful Meat

#2f7b8f

Location

Chilly, Cloudy Namibia

Time of Day

9:42

Extraction Point

7 Miles NNE

Time to Complete

4 Hours

Snoopers,
As you can see you are trapped inside within earshot of a Abandoned Maze . We almost couldn't find you — Please explain when you get back. All we know is "Indigo Koalas" is responsible and they sent us this message - "The group finds a dollar on the ground at the Unicorn Nest". Your mission was intelligence, achieve what you can.

Hopefully you still have that Clean Cigarette hidden on you.

— The Vinyl record player you were holding self destructs.

The Villain Dossier

Name

Ella Glover

Alias

"Indigo Koalas"

Features

6' 8"

Gray eyes

Large moles / Right eye

Organization

The Agency of Miniature Sabre

Emotions

Bitter

Personality

Usually Flaky

Motive

Disrupt the military out of survival

Bodyguard

Tony the "Shitty Humanoid"

Physical Size

Diminutive

Story

Additional Locations

The Beautiful Carnival

Crowded Business

Sanitation Carousal

Random Events

Hound catches on fire

Vagabond Finds gold in the water

Leopard screams at the top of their lungs

Tramp Is throwing a BBQ

World

Stores

Adaline's Shirt Outlet

Gregory's Vase Specialities

Joseph's Shirt Bureau

Cunningham's Pipe Mall

Traps

Incendiary Cloud

Acid Arrow of Joy

Objects

Shirt that is glowing

Shirt that has been hollowed out

Secret Vase

Hidden Nipple Clamp

Sabre of Joy

Wand of Wonder

Anyone nearby who’s carrying open flame is terrified of fire

People

Name Codename Career Likes Dislikes
Melody Gregory "White Lox" Merchant Houses Essential Oils
Gracie Joseph "Indigo Ribs" Mole Snowglobes Mirrors
Leo Kim Drummer Rubber Stamps Dolphins
Adaline Kennedy Sad Whipped Cream Sailboats
Cora Cunningham Railroad Conductor Doors Cousins

Cipher



                

                
 
                

                

                

                

                

                

The Fuck Is This?

After years of playing Dungeons & Dragons, I decided to make a variation where everything is improv. The DM knows as much as the players and you tell a story together - sitcom style. We use this site as a quest starter, think of some characters, and see how much we can make each other laugh.

It's designed to be simple, portable, and dependent on being creative & inventive. I wanted a framework to guide the plot forward but let us find the story. This page is just a guide to help the stories become too redundant - take as much as you want, ignore as much as you need. If you want to follow along with our adventures or read some examples, check out my personal story notes.

This concept and site was crafted by Andrew Maruska with linguistic help from Evan Stark

But how?

The Most Important Rule

Be Silly. The goal is to laugh not to have a normal adventure. Someone wants to go to the moon? Fuck yeah they do and we're going to do it with medieval technology.

Set Up

Give the players a home base, a year they want to play in, and some general ownership of the setup. It's more successful when everyone has helped create the world because when a player makes suggestions it's easier to integrate them without feeling too precious. It helps to have a figurehead that assigns the quest to authoritatively start.

Characters

90% of creating a character here is a funny voice you're forced to talk in for 3 hours. I typically have people pick one trait they want to be good at and give them a slight advantage when using that - and the same for a negative trait. Don't overcomplicate it. They wanna be a skateboarder who can't feel love? perfect. +2 to cool & -2 to social acceptance.

Rolling

This can be whatever you want but as a general rule I use d20's as a graded scale. Sometimes, I craft the roll to mimic the action i.e. if they are walking a tight rope then might need to roll a 10 because 20 & 1 make them fall to one side or the other. Rolling in D&D got boring so make it fun again.

Dungeon Master

Your goal is to say 'Yes and...' but realistically it's 'Yes and roll to see if you can actually do that triple backflip down the cliff to mount the attacking phoenix...' - It's okay to make them fail, just don't tell them no. This guide is to help you be 1 step ahead of the players but it can't know the vibe of the room, have some empathy and play to the crowd.

Ending

No one can tell you this. The guide is to help you get 1/3 of the adventure set up and the rest will be created by the adventuring party. Have fun with it and try to tie up some loose ends at the end (or don't and bring them back for another adventure).