The Director Welcomes You

Poison, Twist, Hell, Spy.

#e32419

Location

Foggy, Wet India

Time of Day

16:2

Extraction Point

22 Miles SSE

Time to Complete

40 Hours

Informants,
This week should be easy. You are delivering a Bureau that has been hollowed out. Get to India at 21:09

Good Luck.

— The Burner Phone you were holding self destructs.

The Villain Dossier

Name

Kimberly Cook

Alias

"Nice Wraith"

Features

5' 7"

Green eyes

Faint curved scar / Right thumb

Organization

The League of Breezy Hell

Emotions

Relieved

Personality

Sharply Easy

Motive

Take over a government to save humanity

Bodyguard

Jose the "Rotten Cat"

Physical Size

Puny

Story

Additional Locations

The Insidious Port

Underground Festival

Obsession Carnival

Random Events

Wanderer Calls menacingly

Deadbeat strikes the ground

Squirrel approaches

Crowd Protests

World

Stores

Ivy's Bureau Emporium

Lane's Drawers Unlimited

Gardner's Urn Boutique

Patel's Pedestal Chic Chåteau

Traps

Symbol of Hypnosis

Bricks from Ceiling of Imperfection

Objects

Bureau that has been hollowed out

Urn that is glowing

Secret Drawers

Hidden Boiled Leather

Javelins of Imperfection

Wand of Wonder

Target’s maximum natural lifespan doubles

People

Name Codename Career Likes Dislikes
Olivia Lane "Black Tongues" Merchant Money Cartography
Luna Gardner "Fast Kidneys" Mole Fire Bears
Alexis Gray Pharmacist Dinosaurs Batteries
Ivy Neal Vision Harmonica Painting
Colton Patel Technician Cookies Scarves

Cipher



                

                
 
                

                

                

                

                

                

The Fuck Is This?

After years of playing Dungeons & Dragons, I decided to make a variation where everything is improv. The DM knows as much as the players and you tell a story together - sitcom style. We use this site as a quest starter, think of some characters, and see how much we can make each other laugh.

It's designed to be simple, portable, and dependent on being creative & inventive. I wanted a framework to guide the plot forward but let us find the story. This page is just a guide to help the stories become too redundant - take as much as you want, ignore as much as you need. If you want to follow along with our adventures or read some examples, check out my personal story notes.

This concept and site was crafted by Andrew Maruska with linguistic help from Evan Stark

But how?

The Most Important Rule

Be Silly. The goal is to laugh not to have a normal adventure. Someone wants to go to the moon? Fuck yeah they do and we're going to do it with medieval technology.

Set Up

Give the players a home base, a year they want to play in, and some general ownership of the setup. It's more successful when everyone has helped create the world because when a player makes suggestions it's easier to integrate them without feeling too precious. It helps to have a figurehead that assigns the quest to authoritatively start.

Characters

90% of creating a character here is a funny voice you're forced to talk in for 3 hours. I typically have people pick one trait they want to be good at and give them a slight advantage when using that - and the same for a negative trait. Don't overcomplicate it. They wanna be a skateboarder who can't feel love? perfect. +2 to cool & -2 to social acceptance.

Rolling

This can be whatever you want but as a general rule I use d20's as a graded scale. Sometimes, I craft the roll to mimic the action i.e. if they are walking a tight rope then might need to roll a 10 because 20 & 1 make them fall to one side or the other. Rolling in D&D got boring so make it fun again.

Dungeon Master

Your goal is to say 'Yes and...' but realistically it's 'Yes and roll to see if you can actually do that triple backflip down the cliff to mount the attacking phoenix...' - It's okay to make them fail, just don't tell them no. This guide is to help you be 1 step ahead of the players but it can't know the vibe of the room, have some empathy and play to the crowd.

Ending

No one can tell you this. The guide is to help you get 1/3 of the adventure set up and the rest will be created by the adventuring party. Have fun with it and try to tie up some loose ends at the end (or don't and bring them back for another adventure).