The Director Welcomes You

Who is Tim Rocket?

#72004b

Location

Bright, Dry North Macedonia

Time of Day

12:41

Extraction Point

180 Miles NW

Time to Complete

16 Hours

Examiners,
We need your help. Agent Miguel Ball has gone missing and we believe "Violet Yeti" is responsible. They were last seen in North Macedonia at 18:01. The agent sent one final message – "A traveling merchant appears at the old bridge". Take this Clean Tissues - it was their favorite tool and might help you.

— The iPod you were holding self destructs.

The Villain Dossier

Name

Ariana Howard

Alias

"Violet Yeti"

Features

4' 4"

Blue eyes

Stretch Marks / Right thumb

Organization

The Association of Ubiquitous Friction

Emotions

Embarrassed

Personality

Gladly Mannered

Motive

Make a lot of money fueled by conspiracy

Bodyguard

Tim the "Lively Abominable Snowman"

Physical Size

Considerable

Story

Additional Locations

The Billions Forge

Underground Business

Animosity Acropolis

Random Events

Thief is robbed

Chanting Cult Is accused by the law

Druid overflows

Hoard Becomes wounded

World

Stores

Sara's Bed Factory

Rodgers's Ceramic Crock Convenience store

Hudson's Shirt Chic Chåteau

Ball's Cabinet Little shop

Traps

Falling Block

Fireball of Extinction

Objects

Bed that is glowing

Shirt with a False bottom

Secret Ceramic Crock

Hidden Key

Morning Star of Extinction

Wand of Wonder

Caster’s lungs begin to function at half normal efficiency

People

Name Codename Career Likes Dislikes
Nolan Rodgers "Green Dumplings" Merchant Fire Cooking
Savannah Hudson "Nice Noses" Mole Cats Rocks
Joel Pena Physician Trucks Fire
Sara Kelley Drunken Sun Glasses Harmonica
Miguel Ball Judge Sharks Writers

Cipher



                

                
 
                

                

                

                

                

                

The Fuck Is This?

After years of playing Dungeons & Dragons, I decided to make a variation where everything is improv. The DM knows as much as the players and you tell a story together - sitcom style. We use this site as a quest starter, think of some characters, and see how much we can make each other laugh.

It's designed to be simple, portable, and dependent on being creative & inventive. I wanted a framework to guide the plot forward but let us find the story. This page is just a guide to help the stories become too redundant - take as much as you want, ignore as much as you need. If you want to follow along with our adventures or read some examples, check out my personal story notes.

This concept and site was crafted by Andrew Maruska with linguistic help from Evan Stark

But how?

The Most Important Rule

Be Silly. The goal is to laugh not to have a normal adventure. Someone wants to go to the moon? Fuck yeah they do and we're going to do it with medieval technology.

Set Up

Give the players a home base, a year they want to play in, and some general ownership of the setup. It's more successful when everyone has helped create the world because when a player makes suggestions it's easier to integrate them without feeling too precious. It helps to have a figurehead that assigns the quest to authoritatively start.

Characters

90% of creating a character here is a funny voice you're forced to talk in for 3 hours. I typically have people pick one trait they want to be good at and give them a slight advantage when using that - and the same for a negative trait. Don't overcomplicate it. They wanna be a skateboarder who can't feel love? perfect. +2 to cool & -2 to social acceptance.

Rolling

This can be whatever you want but as a general rule I use d20's as a graded scale. Sometimes, I craft the roll to mimic the action i.e. if they are walking a tight rope then might need to roll a 10 because 20 & 1 make them fall to one side or the other. Rolling in D&D got boring so make it fun again.

Dungeon Master

Your goal is to say 'Yes and...' but realistically it's 'Yes and roll to see if you can actually do that triple backflip down the cliff to mount the attacking phoenix...' - It's okay to make them fail, just don't tell them no. This guide is to help you be 1 step ahead of the players but it can't know the vibe of the room, have some empathy and play to the crowd.

Ending

No one can tell you this. The guide is to help you get 1/3 of the adventure set up and the rest will be created by the adventuring party. Have fun with it and try to tie up some loose ends at the end (or don't and bring them back for another adventure).