The Director Welcomes You

Operation — Enlightened Sludge

#9e22f6

Location

Miserable, Overcast Costa Rica

Time of Day

20:8

Extraction Point

190 Miles SW

Time to Complete

44 Hours

Investigators,
It seems "Dull Mummy" has gone level 6. They have been broadcasting this message "A pool of blood at the Turtle Rock". We need you to eliminate them, Afterwards. Their last known location was recorded at 05:03. You have a Delicate Lamp as a last resort. Use carefully.

— The Origami Swan you were holding self destructs.

The Villain Dossier

Name

Kaylee Stanley

Alias

"Dull Mummy"

Features

5' 9"

Brown eyes

Large moles / Crotch

Organization

The company of Nice Fifth

Emotions

Contempt

Personality

Afterwards Municipal

Motive

Take over a government to cause catastrophe

Bodyguard

Larry the "Brave Manticore"

Physical Size

Adult

Story

Additional Locations

The Enlightened Carnival

Underground House

Enjoyment Citadel

Random Events

Beggar Balances on a ledge

VAT of Broth is loose

Crazy Man Is being kidnapped

Midwife runs over an infant

World

Stores

Avery's Ceramic Crock Beauty Stop

Romero's Certificate Beauty Stop

Bush's Candlesticks Creative

Simpson's Letter Opener Chic Chåteau

Traps

Acid Arrow

Rolling Rock of Bravery

Objects

Ceramic Crock that has been hollowed out

Candlesticks that has been hollowed out

Secret Certificate

Hidden Arrows

Sickle of Bravery

Wand of Wonder

Caster accidentally creates a virulent plague in his workshop

People

Name Codename Career Likes Dislikes
Presley Romero "Italian Eyes" Merchant Glass Dolphins
Elise Bush "Indigo Scars" Mole Jazz Technology
Robin Steele Cleaner Lamps Chalk
Avery Owen Drunken Water Cooking
Ariana Simpson Cheerful Robots Rubber Stamps

Cipher



                

                
 
                

                

                

                

                

                

The Fuck Is This?

After years of playing Dungeons & Dragons, I decided to make a variation where everything is improv. The DM knows as much as the players and you tell a story together - sitcom style. We use this site as a quest starter, think of some characters, and see how much we can make each other laugh.

It's designed to be simple, portable, and dependent on being creative & inventive. I wanted a framework to guide the plot forward but let us find the story. This page is just a guide to help the stories become too redundant - take as much as you want, ignore as much as you need. If you want to follow along with our adventures or read some examples, check out my personal story notes.

This concept and site was crafted by Andrew Maruska with linguistic help from Evan Stark

But how?

The Most Important Rule

Be Silly. The goal is to laugh not to have a normal adventure. Someone wants to go to the moon? Fuck yeah they do and we're going to do it with medieval technology.

Set Up

Give the players a home base, a year they want to play in, and some general ownership of the setup. It's more successful when everyone has helped create the world because when a player makes suggestions it's easier to integrate them without feeling too precious. It helps to have a figurehead that assigns the quest to authoritatively start.

Characters

90% of creating a character here is a funny voice you're forced to talk in for 3 hours. I typically have people pick one trait they want to be good at and give them a slight advantage when using that - and the same for a negative trait. Don't overcomplicate it. They wanna be a skateboarder who can't feel love? perfect. +2 to cool & -2 to social acceptance.

Rolling

This can be whatever you want but as a general rule I use d20's as a graded scale. Sometimes, I craft the roll to mimic the action i.e. if they are walking a tight rope then might need to roll a 10 because 20 & 1 make them fall to one side or the other. Rolling in D&D got boring so make it fun again.

Dungeon Master

Your goal is to say 'Yes and...' but realistically it's 'Yes and roll to see if you can actually do that triple backflip down the cliff to mount the attacking phoenix...' - It's okay to make them fail, just don't tell them no. This guide is to help you be 1 step ahead of the players but it can't know the vibe of the room, have some empathy and play to the crowd.

Ending

No one can tell you this. The guide is to help you get 1/3 of the adventure set up and the rest will be created by the adventuring party. Have fun with it and try to tie up some loose ends at the end (or don't and bring them back for another adventure).