The Director Welcomes You

The Certainly Crashing Agent

#d9e861

Location

Warm, Foul Belgium

Time of Day

17:12

Extraction Point

198 Miles NE

Time to Complete

13 Hours

Informants,
It seems "Casual Meerkat" has gone level 4. They have been broadcasting this message "A lone flower growing at the Wizard's Scar". We need you to eliminate them, Certainly. Their last known location was recorded at 22:02. You have a Clandestine Bicycle as a last resort. Use carefully.

— The Tinder Date you were holding self destructs.

The Villain Dossier

Name

Jesse Shelton

Alias

"Casual Meerkat"

Features

6' 8"

Brown eyes

Large deep scar / Left thumb

Organization

The Club of Derogatory Burn

Emotions

Tender

Personality

Certainly Great

Motive

Take over a government to lust for power

Bodyguard

George the "Pugilistic Dolphin"

Physical Size

Lanky

Story

Additional Locations

The Crashing Mansion

Archaic Peninsula

Censorship Isle

Random Events

Gypsy is robbed

Gallon of Trash arrives in the mail

Keg Is being kidnapped

Meteor Gets their hand chopped off

World

Stores

Marcus's Taxidermy animal Worldwide

Rios's Stool Productions

Sharp's Grandfather Clock Warehouse

Pearson's Key Labs

Traps

Reverse Gravity

Fireball of Laughter

Objects

Taxidermy animal that is glowing

Grandfather Clock children's replica

Secret Stool

Hidden Sabre

Pen of Laughter

Wand of Wonder

Target asserts that he worked as a torturer for the king

People

Name Codename Career Likes Dislikes
Kennedy Rios "The Scars" Merchant Bears Jigsaw Puzzles
Miguel Sharp "Tough Hot Dogs" Mole Pillows Robots
Reese Lloyd Angry Rock n' Roll Potatoes
Marcus Riley Ghost Dinosaurs Dice
Ashton Pearson Spirit Chalk Teeth

Cipher



                

                
 
                

                

                

                

                

                

The Fuck Is This?

After years of playing Dungeons & Dragons, I decided to make a variation where everything is improv. The DM knows as much as the players and you tell a story together - sitcom style. We use this site as a quest starter, think of some characters, and see how much we can make each other laugh.

It's designed to be simple, portable, and dependent on being creative & inventive. I wanted a framework to guide the plot forward but let us find the story. This page is just a guide to help the stories become too redundant - take as much as you want, ignore as much as you need. If you want to follow along with our adventures or read some examples, check out my personal story notes.

This concept and site was crafted by Andrew Maruska with linguistic help from Evan Stark

But how?

The Most Important Rule

Be Silly. The goal is to laugh not to have a normal adventure. Someone wants to go to the moon? Fuck yeah they do and we're going to do it with medieval technology.

Set Up

Give the players a home base, a year they want to play in, and some general ownership of the setup. It's more successful when everyone has helped create the world because when a player makes suggestions it's easier to integrate them without feeling too precious. It helps to have a figurehead that assigns the quest to authoritatively start.

Characters

90% of creating a character here is a funny voice you're forced to talk in for 3 hours. I typically have people pick one trait they want to be good at and give them a slight advantage when using that - and the same for a negative trait. Don't overcomplicate it. They wanna be a skateboarder who can't feel love? perfect. +2 to cool & -2 to social acceptance.

Rolling

This can be whatever you want but as a general rule I use d20's as a graded scale. Sometimes, I craft the roll to mimic the action i.e. if they are walking a tight rope then might need to roll a 10 because 20 & 1 make them fall to one side or the other. Rolling in D&D got boring so make it fun again.

Dungeon Master

Your goal is to say 'Yes and...' but realistically it's 'Yes and roll to see if you can actually do that triple backflip down the cliff to mount the attacking phoenix...' - It's okay to make them fail, just don't tell them no. This guide is to help you be 1 step ahead of the players but it can't know the vibe of the room, have some empathy and play to the crowd.

Ending

No one can tell you this. The guide is to help you get 1/3 of the adventure set up and the rest will be created by the adventuring party. Have fun with it and try to tie up some loose ends at the end (or don't and bring them back for another adventure).