The Director Welcomes You
The Library Animosity Protocol
#b28946
Examiners, It seems "Violet Rabbit" has gone level 6. They have been broadcasting this message "A white horse dashes past at the Underwater cave". We need you to eliminate them, Intensely. Their last known location was recorded at 06:04. You have a Clean Paint as a last resort. Use carefully.
— The Vinyl record player you were holding self destructs.
Zion Blair
"Violet Rabbit"
4' 2"
Heterochromia eyes
Stretch Marks / Left thumb
The League of Zealous Space Station
Defeated
Intensely Moist
Take over a country to please their master
David the "Childish Succubus"
Minuscule
The Repulsive Circus
Archaic Shelter
Purity Palace
Pack of Wild Dogs arrives in the mail
Bag of Flour Bursts loudly
Princess catches on fire
Rhapsody Bursts loudly
Adeline's Urn Atelier
Banks's Armoir Couture
Smith's Potted Plant Atelier
Morgan's Hanging Birdcage Properties
Suspicious door with lock
Burning Hands of Animosity
Urn children's replica
Potted Plant made of heavy metal
Secret Armoir
Hidden Banana
Hatchet of Animosity
No females within 50 yards can be injured by males for 6d8 hours
| Name | Codename | Career | Likes | Dislikes |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| Laila Banks | "Chunky Hearts" | Merchant | Chalk | Gym Memberships |
| Weston Smith | "Violet Dumplings" | Mole | Tissues | Lions |
| Madison Haynes | Weakened | Death | Teeth | |
| Adeline Curtis | Frazzled | Coffee | Candy | |
| Kayla Morgan | Acupuncturist | Dice | Football |
After years of playing Dungeons & Dragons, I decided to make a variation where everything is improv. The DM knows as much as the players and you tell a story together - sitcom style. We use this site as a quest starter, think of some characters, and see how much we can make each other laugh.
It's designed to be simple, portable, and dependent on being creative & inventive. I wanted a framework to guide the plot forward but let us find the story. This page is just a guide to help the stories become too redundant - take as much as you want, ignore as much as you need. If you want to follow along with our adventures or read some examples, check out my personal story notes.
This concept and site was crafted by Andrew Maruska with linguistic help from Evan Stark
Be Silly. The goal is to laugh not to have a normal adventure. Someone wants to go to the moon? Fuck yeah they do and we're going to do it with medieval technology.
Set UpGive the players a home base, a year they want to play in, and some general ownership of the setup. It's more successful when everyone has helped create the world because when a player makes suggestions it's easier to integrate them without feeling too precious. It helps to have a figurehead that assigns the quest to authoritatively start.
Characters90% of creating a character here is a funny voice you're forced to talk in for 3 hours. I typically have people pick one trait they want to be good at and give them a slight advantage when using that - and the same for a negative trait. Don't overcomplicate it. They wanna be a skateboarder who can't feel love? perfect. +2 to cool & -2 to social acceptance.
RollingThis can be whatever you want but as a general rule I use d20's as a graded scale. Sometimes, I craft the roll to mimic the action i.e. if they are walking a tight rope then might need to roll a 10 because 20 & 1 make them fall to one side or the other. Rolling in D&D got boring so make it fun again.
Dungeon MasterYour goal is to say 'Yes and...' but realistically it's 'Yes and roll to see if you can actually do that triple backflip down the cliff to mount the attacking phoenix...' - It's okay to make them fail, just don't tell them no. This guide is to help you be 1 step ahead of the players but it can't know the vibe of the room, have some empathy and play to the crowd.
EndingNo one can tell you this. The guide is to help you get 1/3 of the adventure set up and the rest will be created by the adventuring party. Have fun with it and try to tie up some loose ends at the end (or don't and bring them back for another adventure).