The Director Welcomes You

Shovel, Crib, Area, Spy.

#094a1a

Location

Icy, Rainy Sierra Leone

Time of Day

0:40

Extraction Point

185 Miles NW

Time to Complete

41 Hours

Silent Negotiators,
This week should be easy. You are delivering a Iron stove with a False bottom. Get to Sierra Leone at 04:19

Good Luck.

— The Tablet of Stone you were holding self destructs.

The Villain Dossier

Name

Callie Stevens

Alias

"Meaty Wendigo"

Features

7' 9"

Gray eyes

A second belly button / Right eye

Organization

The Guild of Crooked Area

Emotions

Elated

Personality

Carefully Fastidious

Motive

Take over a government for fear of the heroes

Bodyguard

Hal the "Scaley Platypuses"

Physical Size

Insignificant

Story

Additional Locations

The Pre-Pubescent Isle

Archaic Palace

Destruction City

Random Events

Wedding Cake Is being detained

Baker Evades the law

Store arrives in the mail

Horse Carriage catches on fire

World

Stores

Karter's Iron stove Creative

Pope's Skeletal Animal Du jour

Snyder's File Wardrobe

Reynolds's Canopy Bed Couture

Traps

Moving Executioner Statue

Javelin of Violence

Objects

Iron stove with a False bottom

File made of heavy metal

Secret Skeletal Animal

Hidden Bangle

Chewing Gum of Violence

Wand of Wonder

Next person wounded by target must Save or teleport 1d4 miles

People

Name Codename Career Likes Dislikes
Luna Pope "Mini Cappuccinos" Merchant Water Oranges
Sophia Snyder "Plump Tongues" Mole Chili Glitter
Chase Hill Dog surfing instructor Doors Books
Karter McGuire Railroad Conductor Soccer Basketball
Christopher Reynolds Bounty hunter Ice Cubes Singing

Cipher



                

                
 
                

                

                

                

                

                

The Fuck Is This?

After years of playing Dungeons & Dragons, I decided to make a variation where everything is improv. The DM knows as much as the players and you tell a story together - sitcom style. We use this site as a quest starter, think of some characters, and see how much we can make each other laugh.

It's designed to be simple, portable, and dependent on being creative & inventive. I wanted a framework to guide the plot forward but let us find the story. This page is just a guide to help the stories become too redundant - take as much as you want, ignore as much as you need. If you want to follow along with our adventures or read some examples, check out my personal story notes.

This concept and site was crafted by Andrew Maruska with linguistic help from Evan Stark

But how?

The Most Important Rule

Be Silly. The goal is to laugh not to have a normal adventure. Someone wants to go to the moon? Fuck yeah they do and we're going to do it with medieval technology.

Set Up

Give the players a home base, a year they want to play in, and some general ownership of the setup. It's more successful when everyone has helped create the world because when a player makes suggestions it's easier to integrate them without feeling too precious. It helps to have a figurehead that assigns the quest to authoritatively start.

Characters

90% of creating a character here is a funny voice you're forced to talk in for 3 hours. I typically have people pick one trait they want to be good at and give them a slight advantage when using that - and the same for a negative trait. Don't overcomplicate it. They wanna be a skateboarder who can't feel love? perfect. +2 to cool & -2 to social acceptance.

Rolling

This can be whatever you want but as a general rule I use d20's as a graded scale. Sometimes, I craft the roll to mimic the action i.e. if they are walking a tight rope then might need to roll a 10 because 20 & 1 make them fall to one side or the other. Rolling in D&D got boring so make it fun again.

Dungeon Master

Your goal is to say 'Yes and...' but realistically it's 'Yes and roll to see if you can actually do that triple backflip down the cliff to mount the attacking phoenix...' - It's okay to make them fail, just don't tell them no. This guide is to help you be 1 step ahead of the players but it can't know the vibe of the room, have some empathy and play to the crowd.

Ending

No one can tell you this. The guide is to help you get 1/3 of the adventure set up and the rest will be created by the adventuring party. Have fun with it and try to tie up some loose ends at the end (or don't and bring them back for another adventure).