The Director Welcomes You

Who is Sam Existence?

#e71fa1

Location

Cloudless, Icy Estonia

Time of Day

3:20

Extraction Point

193 Miles E

Time to Complete

12 Hours

Operatives,
It seems "Yellow Elephants" has gone level 3. They have been broadcasting this message "The group finds a random cow at the Skull shaped island". We need you to eliminate them, Wonderfully. Their last known location was recorded at 16:14. You have a Light Blender as a last resort. Use carefully.

— The Tape recorder you were holding self destructs.

The Villain Dossier

Name

Sadie Dominguez

Alias

"Yellow Elephants"

Features

7' 2"

Blue eyes

Large moles / Right foot

Organization

The Gang of Panicky Flesh

Emotions

Bitter

Personality

Wonderfully Dank

Motive

Take over a country for honor

Bodyguard

Sam the "Immense Orcs"

Physical Size

Short

Story

Additional Locations

The Faithful Lodge

Rundown Carousal

Bravery City

Random Events

Princess Finds gold in the water

Dancer Integrates silently into the group

Midwife Is accused by the law

Crazy Man runs over an infant

World

Stores

Lauren's Bible Du jour

Nguyen's Hanging Birdcage Industries

Torres's Flower in Vase Ventures

Fernandez's Staircase Market

Traps

Incendiary Cloud

Wall Blade of Euthanasia

Objects

Bible children's replica

Flower in Vase children's replica

Secret Hanging Birdcage

Hidden Hatchet

Brass Knuckles of Euthanasia

Wand of Wonder

The entire area looks as if a huge battle took place yesterday

People

Name Codename Career Likes Dislikes
Hailey Nguyen "Two Dumplings" Merchant Oranges Plushies
Daniel Torres "No Ankles" Mole Paper Chickens
Gabriel Adkins Funeral Director Oranges Chickens
Lauren Byrd Counselor Teeth Tigers
Liliana Fernandez Electrician Quartz Crystals Football

Cipher



                

                
 
                

                

                

                

                

                

The Fuck Is This?

After years of playing Dungeons & Dragons, I decided to make a variation where everything is improv. The DM knows as much as the players and you tell a story together - sitcom style. We use this site as a quest starter, think of some characters, and see how much we can make each other laugh.

It's designed to be simple, portable, and dependent on being creative & inventive. I wanted a framework to guide the plot forward but let us find the story. This page is just a guide to help the stories become too redundant - take as much as you want, ignore as much as you need. If you want to follow along with our adventures or read some examples, check out my personal story notes.

This concept and site was crafted by Andrew Maruska with linguistic help from Evan Stark

But how?

The Most Important Rule

Be Silly. The goal is to laugh not to have a normal adventure. Someone wants to go to the moon? Fuck yeah they do and we're going to do it with medieval technology.

Set Up

Give the players a home base, a year they want to play in, and some general ownership of the setup. It's more successful when everyone has helped create the world because when a player makes suggestions it's easier to integrate them without feeling too precious. It helps to have a figurehead that assigns the quest to authoritatively start.

Characters

90% of creating a character here is a funny voice you're forced to talk in for 3 hours. I typically have people pick one trait they want to be good at and give them a slight advantage when using that - and the same for a negative trait. Don't overcomplicate it. They wanna be a skateboarder who can't feel love? perfect. +2 to cool & -2 to social acceptance.

Rolling

This can be whatever you want but as a general rule I use d20's as a graded scale. Sometimes, I craft the roll to mimic the action i.e. if they are walking a tight rope then might need to roll a 10 because 20 & 1 make them fall to one side or the other. Rolling in D&D got boring so make it fun again.

Dungeon Master

Your goal is to say 'Yes and...' but realistically it's 'Yes and roll to see if you can actually do that triple backflip down the cliff to mount the attacking phoenix...' - It's okay to make them fail, just don't tell them no. This guide is to help you be 1 step ahead of the players but it can't know the vibe of the room, have some empathy and play to the crowd.

Ending

No one can tell you this. The guide is to help you get 1/3 of the adventure set up and the rest will be created by the adventuring party. Have fun with it and try to tie up some loose ends at the end (or don't and bring them back for another adventure).