The Director Welcomes You

Du jour Royale

#bd60c5

Location

Gloomy, Arid Seychelles

Time of Day

4:10

Extraction Point

99 Miles E

Time to Complete

18 Hours

Detectives,
I have sent you to fly above a Rundown Park to look for a suspect by the name "Wild Platypuses". This mission is clandestine. Their recent activity is concerning and we need you to slow them down. We don't know much about their goals but we've intercepted this cryptic message – "A vagrant asks for money at the Crossroads".

We're low budget this mission – I've packed a Colorful Candle in your kit to help.

— The Burner Phone you were holding self destructs.

The Villain Dossier

Name

Kayla Wheeler

Alias

"Wild Platypuses"

Features

5' 6"

Heterochromia eyes

Large deep scar / Right leg

Organization

The Clique of Gifted Log Cabin

Emotions

Anxious

Personality

Usefully Shallow

Motive

Disrupt the military to lust for power

Bodyguard

Peter the "Rotten Serpent"

Physical Size

Trifling

Story

Additional Locations

The Nervous Lake

Expensive Barn Dance

Joy Lodge

Random Events

Chauvinist Is frozen into a block of ice

Crying Child runs over an infant

Box of Cigarette Glistens gently

Goblet is being loudly arrested

World

Stores

Alexandra's Telescope Du jour

Glover's Pair of Statues Little shop

Pham's File International

Perez's Stairwell International

Traps

Javelin

Hail of Needles of Oblivion

Objects

Telescope that has been hollowed out

File that is glowing

Secret Pair of Statues

Hidden Club

Lance of Oblivion

Wand of Wonder

Everyone knows that the target’s head is completely hollow

People

Name Codename Career Likes Dislikes
Santiago Glover "Nice Pinky's" Merchant Ice Cubes Sun Glasses
David Pham "Junior Dumplings" Mole Essential Oils Sharks
Ryleigh Watkins Veteran Easter Bread
Alexandra Walker Vision Cooking Shirts
Eden Perez Old Timer Bread Clocks

Cipher



                


                

                    
                    

                


                

                    
                    
 
                


                

                    
                    

                


                

                    
                    

                


                

                    
                    

                

                
                

                    
                    

                


                

                    
                    

                

              

            

          

        

      

    



    
      
      
 
        

          

            
The Fuck Is This?

          

          

            
            
After years of playing Dungeons & Dragons, I decided to make a variation where everything is improv. The DM knows as much as the players and you tell a story together - sitcom style. We use this site as a quest starter, think of some characters, and see how much we can make each other laugh.

            
            
It's designed to be simple, portable, and dependent on being creative & inventive. I wanted a framework to guide the plot forward but let us find the story. This page is just a guide to help the stories become too redundant - take as much as you want, ignore as much as you need. If you want to follow along with our adventures or read some examples, check out  my personal story notes.

            
            
This concept and site was crafted by Andrew Maruska with linguistic help from Evan Stark

          

        

      

    


    
      
      
 
        

          

            
But how?

          

          
            
            The Most Important Rule
            
Be Silly. The goal is to laugh not to have a normal adventure. Someone wants to go to the moon? Fuck yeah they do and we're going to do it with medieval technology.

            
            Set Up
            
Give the players a home base, a year they want to play in, and some general ownership of the setup. It's more successful when everyone has helped create the world because when a player makes suggestions it's easier to integrate them without feeling too precious. It helps to have a figurehead that assigns the quest to authoritatively start.

            
            Characters
            
90% of creating a character here is a funny voice you're forced to talk in for 3 hours. I typically have people pick one trait they want to be good at and give them a slight advantage when using that - and the same for a negative trait. Don't overcomplicate it. They wanna be a skateboarder who can't feel love? perfect. +2 to cool & -2 to social acceptance. 

            
            Rolling
            
This can be whatever you want but as a general rule I use d20's as a graded scale. Sometimes, I craft the roll to mimic the action i.e. if they are walking a tight rope then might need to roll a 10 because 20 & 1 make them fall to one side or the other. Rolling in D&D got boring so make it fun again. 

            
            Dungeon Master
            
Your goal is to say 'Yes and...' but realistically it's 'Yes and roll to see if you can actually do that triple backflip down the cliff to mount the attacking phoenix...' - It's okay to make them fail, just don't tell them no. This guide is to help you be 1 step ahead of the players but it can't know the vibe of the room, have some empathy and play to the crowd. 

            
            Ending
            
No one can tell you this. The guide is to help you get 1/3 of the adventure set up and the rest will be created by the adventuring party. Have fun with it and try to tie up some loose ends at the end (or don't and bring them back for another adventure).