The Director Welcomes You

Operation — Flat Butter

#54dcad

Location

Gloomy, Frigid Chad

Time of Day

2:18

Extraction Point

111 Miles S

Time to Complete

34 Hours

Ambassadors,
As you can see you are trapped inside underneathe a Overpopulated Arcade . We almost couldn't find you — Please explain when you get back. All we know is "Sharp Platypuses" is responsible and they sent us this message - "A thick fog rolls in at the Screaming Waterfall". Your mission was black bag, achieve what you can.

Hopefully you still have that Polished Umbrella hidden on you.

— The Microsoft Zune you were holding self destructs.

The Villain Dossier

Name

Nicole Roberts

Alias

"Sharp Platypuses"

Features

4' 1"

Amber eyes

Large moles / Left thumb

Organization

The Gang of Straight Worm

Emotions

Pleased

Personality

Kissingly Skinny

Motive

Make a lot of money for pure destruction

Bodyguard

Penelope the "Frilled Demon"

Physical Size

Lanky

Story

Additional Locations

The Flat Acropolis

Underwater Villa

Calming Barn Dance

Random Events

Hoard Integrates silently into the group

Pine Branch overflows

Robber is robbed

Swarm of Bees Calls menacingly

World

Stores

Benjamin's Trinket Technologies

Simon's Coat Discount

Hanson's Cabinet International

Gregory's Statuette Chic Chåteau

Traps

Poison Wall Spikes

Earthquake of Good Spirits

Objects

Trinket that has been hollowed out

Cabinet children's replica

Secret Coat

Hidden Sticks

Banana of Good Spirits

Wand of Wonder

Target is blind until he wets his hair

People

Name Codename Career Likes Dislikes
Ashton Simon "The Hearts" Merchant Soup Death
Brandon Hanson "One Pretzels" Mole Soap Video Games
Christopher Barker Stressed Butterflies Soup
Benjamin Fox Funeral Director Batteries Octopus
Bryson Gregory Psychiatrist Octopus Sailboats

Cipher



                

                
 
                

                

                

                

                

                

The Fuck Is This?

After years of playing Dungeons & Dragons, I decided to make a variation where everything is improv. The DM knows as much as the players and you tell a story together - sitcom style. We use this site as a quest starter, think of some characters, and see how much we can make each other laugh.

It's designed to be simple, portable, and dependent on being creative & inventive. I wanted a framework to guide the plot forward but let us find the story. This page is just a guide to help the stories become too redundant - take as much as you want, ignore as much as you need. If you want to follow along with our adventures or read some examples, check out my personal story notes.

This concept and site was crafted by Andrew Maruska with linguistic help from Evan Stark

But how?

The Most Important Rule

Be Silly. The goal is to laugh not to have a normal adventure. Someone wants to go to the moon? Fuck yeah they do and we're going to do it with medieval technology.

Set Up

Give the players a home base, a year they want to play in, and some general ownership of the setup. It's more successful when everyone has helped create the world because when a player makes suggestions it's easier to integrate them without feeling too precious. It helps to have a figurehead that assigns the quest to authoritatively start.

Characters

90% of creating a character here is a funny voice you're forced to talk in for 3 hours. I typically have people pick one trait they want to be good at and give them a slight advantage when using that - and the same for a negative trait. Don't overcomplicate it. They wanna be a skateboarder who can't feel love? perfect. +2 to cool & -2 to social acceptance.

Rolling

This can be whatever you want but as a general rule I use d20's as a graded scale. Sometimes, I craft the roll to mimic the action i.e. if they are walking a tight rope then might need to roll a 10 because 20 & 1 make them fall to one side or the other. Rolling in D&D got boring so make it fun again.

Dungeon Master

Your goal is to say 'Yes and...' but realistically it's 'Yes and roll to see if you can actually do that triple backflip down the cliff to mount the attacking phoenix...' - It's okay to make them fail, just don't tell them no. This guide is to help you be 1 step ahead of the players but it can't know the vibe of the room, have some empathy and play to the crowd.

Ending

No one can tell you this. The guide is to help you get 1/3 of the adventure set up and the rest will be created by the adventuring party. Have fun with it and try to tie up some loose ends at the end (or don't and bring them back for another adventure).