The Director Welcomes You

The Juice Calming Incident

#53f088

Location

Chilly, Cloudy Uganda

Time of Day

23:43

Extraction Point

54 Miles NNE

Time to Complete

45 Hours

Ambassadors,
We need your help. Agent Naomi Graves has gone missing and we believe "Orange Siren" is responsible. They were last seen in Uganda at 01:11. The agent sent one final message – "A shadow passes at the Where grass will not grow". Take this Polished Mirror - it was their favorite tool and might help you.

— The iPod you were holding self destructs.

The Villain Dossier

Name

Justin Brooks

Alias

"Orange Siren"

Features

4' 2"

Red eyes

Large deep scar / Right middle finger

Organization

The Task Force of Rotten Juice

Emotions

Happy

Personality

Defiantly Broad

Motive

Make a lot of money for fear of the heroes

Bodyguard

Charles the "Cold Ogre"

Physical Size

Scanty

Story

Additional Locations

The Deafening Chateau

Underwater Arcade

Animosity Palace

Random Events

Turtle Is being detained

Bank Integrates silently into the group

Cat Is hurled at the adventurers

Lactose Intolerance Gets their hand chopped off

World

Stores

Maddox's Bible Chic Chåteau

Contreras's Figurine Logistics

Hardy's Ceramic Crock Unlimited

Graves's Faberge Egg Unlimited

Traps

Burning Hands

Dropping Ceiling of Calming

Objects

Bible with a False bottom

Ceramic Crock that is glowing

Secret Figurine

Hidden Fork

Medallion of Calming

Wand of Wonder

Caster must insult any figure of authority at least 1d4 times

People

Name Codename Career Likes Dislikes
Leilani Contreras "Slow Pinky's" Merchant Soup Paperclips
Christian Hardy "King Ankles" Mole Sticky Notes Hammers
Brantley Wheeler Dead Tired Rock n' Roll Hammers
Maddox Warren Journalist Sponges Broccoli
Naomi Graves Operator Rubber Bands Physics

Cipher



                

                
 
                

                

                

                

                

                

The Fuck Is This?

After years of playing Dungeons & Dragons, I decided to make a variation where everything is improv. The DM knows as much as the players and you tell a story together - sitcom style. We use this site as a quest starter, think of some characters, and see how much we can make each other laugh.

It's designed to be simple, portable, and dependent on being creative & inventive. I wanted a framework to guide the plot forward but let us find the story. This page is just a guide to help the stories become too redundant - take as much as you want, ignore as much as you need. If you want to follow along with our adventures or read some examples, check out my personal story notes.

This concept and site was crafted by Andrew Maruska with linguistic help from Evan Stark

But how?

The Most Important Rule

Be Silly. The goal is to laugh not to have a normal adventure. Someone wants to go to the moon? Fuck yeah they do and we're going to do it with medieval technology.

Set Up

Give the players a home base, a year they want to play in, and some general ownership of the setup. It's more successful when everyone has helped create the world because when a player makes suggestions it's easier to integrate them without feeling too precious. It helps to have a figurehead that assigns the quest to authoritatively start.

Characters

90% of creating a character here is a funny voice you're forced to talk in for 3 hours. I typically have people pick one trait they want to be good at and give them a slight advantage when using that - and the same for a negative trait. Don't overcomplicate it. They wanna be a skateboarder who can't feel love? perfect. +2 to cool & -2 to social acceptance.

Rolling

This can be whatever you want but as a general rule I use d20's as a graded scale. Sometimes, I craft the roll to mimic the action i.e. if they are walking a tight rope then might need to roll a 10 because 20 & 1 make them fall to one side or the other. Rolling in D&D got boring so make it fun again.

Dungeon Master

Your goal is to say 'Yes and...' but realistically it's 'Yes and roll to see if you can actually do that triple backflip down the cliff to mount the attacking phoenix...' - It's okay to make them fail, just don't tell them no. This guide is to help you be 1 step ahead of the players but it can't know the vibe of the room, have some empathy and play to the crowd.

Ending

No one can tell you this. The guide is to help you get 1/3 of the adventure set up and the rest will be created by the adventuring party. Have fun with it and try to tie up some loose ends at the end (or don't and bring them back for another adventure).