The Director Welcomes You

The Lazily Brave Agent

#5f5791

Location

Icy, Foggy Georgia

Time of Day

4:38

Extraction Point

174 Miles SW

Time to Complete

21 Hours

Examiners,
We need your help. Agent Aaliyah Cole has gone missing and we believe "All Yeti" is responsible. They were last seen in Georgia at 05:04. The agent sent one final message – "The group finds a dead fish at the Sacrificial Hole". Take this Vicious Clock - it was their favorite tool and might help you.

— The Portable Radio you were holding self destructs.

The Villain Dossier

Name

Charles Coleman

Alias

"All Yeti"

Features

5' 2"

Heterochromia eyes

A second belly button / Right eye

Organization

The Division of Revolting Cough

Emotions

Angry

Personality

Lazily Future

Motive

Take over a government to please their master

Bodyguard

Tim the "Fast Imp"

Physical Size

Bantam

Story

Additional Locations

The Brave Pond

Expensive Maze

Fatality Creek

Random Events

Sewer gathers near a point of interest

Cauldron Integrates silently into the group

Corncob Salutes the adventurers

Crow skins a cat with his teeth

World

Stores

Cooper's Bookcase Brothers

Solis's Flower in Vase Properties

Simpson's Workbench Worldwide

Cole's Sink Labs

Traps

Reverse Gravity

Reverse Gravity of Extermination

Objects

Bookcase that has been hollowed out

Workbench that has been hollowed out

Secret Flower in Vase

Hidden Chewing Gum

Whip of Extermination

Wand of Wonder

Next person to wound the target suffers equal damage

People

Name Codename Career Likes Dislikes
Teagan Solis "Heavy Hearts" Merchant Glass Shirts
Arianna Simpson "Indigo Scars" Mole Acorns Plushies
Ruby Nguyen The Body Soda Chili
Cooper Norman Vision Flashlights Deodorant
Aaliyah Cole Elevator Mechanic Soup Bears

Cipher



                

                
 
                

                

                

                

                

                

The Fuck Is This?

After years of playing Dungeons & Dragons, I decided to make a variation where everything is improv. The DM knows as much as the players and you tell a story together - sitcom style. We use this site as a quest starter, think of some characters, and see how much we can make each other laugh.

It's designed to be simple, portable, and dependent on being creative & inventive. I wanted a framework to guide the plot forward but let us find the story. This page is just a guide to help the stories become too redundant - take as much as you want, ignore as much as you need. If you want to follow along with our adventures or read some examples, check out my personal story notes.

This concept and site was crafted by Andrew Maruska with linguistic help from Evan Stark

But how?

The Most Important Rule

Be Silly. The goal is to laugh not to have a normal adventure. Someone wants to go to the moon? Fuck yeah they do and we're going to do it with medieval technology.

Set Up

Give the players a home base, a year they want to play in, and some general ownership of the setup. It's more successful when everyone has helped create the world because when a player makes suggestions it's easier to integrate them without feeling too precious. It helps to have a figurehead that assigns the quest to authoritatively start.

Characters

90% of creating a character here is a funny voice you're forced to talk in for 3 hours. I typically have people pick one trait they want to be good at and give them a slight advantage when using that - and the same for a negative trait. Don't overcomplicate it. They wanna be a skateboarder who can't feel love? perfect. +2 to cool & -2 to social acceptance.

Rolling

This can be whatever you want but as a general rule I use d20's as a graded scale. Sometimes, I craft the roll to mimic the action i.e. if they are walking a tight rope then might need to roll a 10 because 20 & 1 make them fall to one side or the other. Rolling in D&D got boring so make it fun again.

Dungeon Master

Your goal is to say 'Yes and...' but realistically it's 'Yes and roll to see if you can actually do that triple backflip down the cliff to mount the attacking phoenix...' - It's okay to make them fail, just don't tell them no. This guide is to help you be 1 step ahead of the players but it can't know the vibe of the room, have some empathy and play to the crowd.

Ending

No one can tell you this. The guide is to help you get 1/3 of the adventure set up and the rest will be created by the adventuring party. Have fun with it and try to tie up some loose ends at the end (or don't and bring them back for another adventure).