The Director Welcomes You
The Mohawk Destruction Protocol
#24be8e
Agents, We need your help. Agent Mila Dennis has gone missing and we believe "Drowsy Rabbit" is responsible. They were last seen in Brunei at 24:19. The agent sent one final message – "A pool of blood at the Frozen palace". Take this Mechanical Pencil - it was their favorite tool and might help you.
— The CD player you were holding self destructs.
Caleb Fitzgerald
"Drowsy Rabbit"
5' 6"
Hazel eyes
Large moles / Neck
The Committee of Hissing Clam
Jealous
Defiantly Gifted
Make a lot of money because of grief and loss
Darnell the "Diligent child"
Gigantic
The Colossal Masquerade
Abandoned Festival
Catastrophe Circus
Buccaneer Catches leprosy
Delivery Guy Glistens gently
Skeleton stop the party and asks questions
Chunk of Beef Is under a curse
Noah's Clamp Mall
Hines's Certificate Collective
Knight's Rug Chic Chåteau
Dennis's Watch Discount
Fire
Camouflaged Pit of Destruction
Clamp children's replica
Rug that is glowing
Secret Certificate
Hidden Lipstick
Scimitar of Destruction
Caster tells malicious lies in the presence of clergy
| Name | Codename | Career | Likes | Dislikes |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| Edward Hines | "Cheap Falafels" | Merchant | Pillows | Toilets |
| Robert Knight | "The Pretzels" | Mole | Singing | Rocks |
| Jade Allen | Indifferent | Paper | Sponges | |
| Noah May | Barber | Soda | Sticks | |
| Mila Dennis | Cobbler | Shirts | Sharp Things |
After years of playing Dungeons & Dragons, I decided to make a variation where everything is improv. The DM knows as much as the players and you tell a story together - sitcom style. We use this site as a quest starter, think of some characters, and see how much we can make each other laugh.
It's designed to be simple, portable, and dependent on being creative & inventive. I wanted a framework to guide the plot forward but let us find the story. This page is just a guide to help the stories become too redundant - take as much as you want, ignore as much as you need. If you want to follow along with our adventures or read some examples, check out my personal story notes.
This concept and site was crafted by Andrew Maruska with linguistic help from Evan Stark
Be Silly. The goal is to laugh not to have a normal adventure. Someone wants to go to the moon? Fuck yeah they do and we're going to do it with medieval technology.
Set UpGive the players a home base, a year they want to play in, and some general ownership of the setup. It's more successful when everyone has helped create the world because when a player makes suggestions it's easier to integrate them without feeling too precious. It helps to have a figurehead that assigns the quest to authoritatively start.
Characters90% of creating a character here is a funny voice you're forced to talk in for 3 hours. I typically have people pick one trait they want to be good at and give them a slight advantage when using that - and the same for a negative trait. Don't overcomplicate it. They wanna be a skateboarder who can't feel love? perfect. +2 to cool & -2 to social acceptance.
RollingThis can be whatever you want but as a general rule I use d20's as a graded scale. Sometimes, I craft the roll to mimic the action i.e. if they are walking a tight rope then might need to roll a 10 because 20 & 1 make them fall to one side or the other. Rolling in D&D got boring so make it fun again.
Dungeon MasterYour goal is to say 'Yes and...' but realistically it's 'Yes and roll to see if you can actually do that triple backflip down the cliff to mount the attacking phoenix...' - It's okay to make them fail, just don't tell them no. This guide is to help you be 1 step ahead of the players but it can't know the vibe of the room, have some empathy and play to the crowd.
EndingNo one can tell you this. The guide is to help you get 1/3 of the adventure set up and the rest will be created by the adventuring party. Have fun with it and try to tie up some loose ends at the end (or don't and bring them back for another adventure).