The Director Welcomes You

The Blue Week Crisis

#8c7e6a

Location

Cloudless, Cloudy Malaysia

Time of Day

14:36

Extraction Point

30 Miles N

Time to Complete

44 Hours

Silent Negotiators,
This week should be easy. You are delivering a Drawers that is glowing. Get to Malaysia at 09:22

Good Luck.

— The Origami Swan you were holding self destructs.

The Villain Dossier

Name

Nicole Roberts

Alias

"Three Werewolf"

Features

5' 5"

Green eyes

A second belly button / Left leg

Organization

The company of Cool Monument

Emotions

Worried

Personality

Joshingly Thankful

Motive

Take over a country for honor

Bodyguard

Alex the "Brave Mongoose"

Physical Size

Minute

Story

Additional Locations

The Blue Sanctuary

Overpopulated Isle

Grave Consequences Carnival

Random Events

Husband Crashes slowly

Bag of Flour explodes

Bag of Lemons strikes the ground

Chunk of Beef Lunges at the group

World

Stores

Thomas's Drawers Worldwide

Hernandez's Painting Worldwide

McGuire's Hat Market

Wade's Shoe Horn Market

Traps

Collapsing Column

Ghoul Touch of The Blackest Black

Objects

Drawers that is glowing

Hat that is glowing

Secret Painting

Hidden Spoon

Brass Knuckles of The Blackest Black

Wand of Wonder

Target’s hands itch slightly when he touches a magic item

People

Name Codename Career Likes Dislikes
Eloise Hernandez "Five Stomachs" Merchant Chickens Drinking
Emmanuel McGuire "Nice Noses" Mole Socks Drinking
Anastasia Dunn Funeral Director Drinking Easter
Thomas Miles Townsfolk Television Batteries
Jacob Wade Psychiatrist Death Squirrels

Cipher



                

                
 
                

                

                

                

                

                

The Fuck Is This?

After years of playing Dungeons & Dragons, I decided to make a variation where everything is improv. The DM knows as much as the players and you tell a story together - sitcom style. We use this site as a quest starter, think of some characters, and see how much we can make each other laugh.

It's designed to be simple, portable, and dependent on being creative & inventive. I wanted a framework to guide the plot forward but let us find the story. This page is just a guide to help the stories become too redundant - take as much as you want, ignore as much as you need. If you want to follow along with our adventures or read some examples, check out my personal story notes.

This concept and site was crafted by Andrew Maruska with linguistic help from Evan Stark

But how?

The Most Important Rule

Be Silly. The goal is to laugh not to have a normal adventure. Someone wants to go to the moon? Fuck yeah they do and we're going to do it with medieval technology.

Set Up

Give the players a home base, a year they want to play in, and some general ownership of the setup. It's more successful when everyone has helped create the world because when a player makes suggestions it's easier to integrate them without feeling too precious. It helps to have a figurehead that assigns the quest to authoritatively start.

Characters

90% of creating a character here is a funny voice you're forced to talk in for 3 hours. I typically have people pick one trait they want to be good at and give them a slight advantage when using that - and the same for a negative trait. Don't overcomplicate it. They wanna be a skateboarder who can't feel love? perfect. +2 to cool & -2 to social acceptance.

Rolling

This can be whatever you want but as a general rule I use d20's as a graded scale. Sometimes, I craft the roll to mimic the action i.e. if they are walking a tight rope then might need to roll a 10 because 20 & 1 make them fall to one side or the other. Rolling in D&D got boring so make it fun again.

Dungeon Master

Your goal is to say 'Yes and...' but realistically it's 'Yes and roll to see if you can actually do that triple backflip down the cliff to mount the attacking phoenix...' - It's okay to make them fail, just don't tell them no. This guide is to help you be 1 step ahead of the players but it can't know the vibe of the room, have some empathy and play to the crowd.

Ending

No one can tell you this. The guide is to help you get 1/3 of the adventure set up and the rest will be created by the adventuring party. Have fun with it and try to tie up some loose ends at the end (or don't and bring them back for another adventure).