The Director Welcomes You

Who is Al Doghouse?

#0a5206

Location

Hot, Sunny Zambia

Time of Day

14:36

Extraction Point

34 Miles E

Time to Complete

40 Hours

Sleuths,
It seems "Bullet gorgon" has gone level 1. They have been broadcasting this message "The group finds a random cow at the witch's mound". We need you to eliminate them, Immediately. Their last known location was recorded at 08:04. You have a Beautiful Blanket as a last resort. Use carefully.

— The Microsoft Zune you were holding self destructs.

The Villain Dossier

Name

Taylor Hampton

Alias

"Bullet gorgon"

Features

5' 2"

Brown eyes

A second belly button / Right arm

Organization

The Authority of Curved Whistle

Emotions

Jealous

Personality

Immediately Late

Motive

Disrupt the military to achieve their destiny

Bodyguard

Al the "Clumsy Mutants"

Physical Size

Gigantic

Story

Additional Locations

The Happy Business

Touristy Maze

Peace Fortress

Random Events

Bunny Is hurled at the adventurers

Skeleton strikes the ground

Crowd emerges

Soup Is accused by the law

World

Stores

Amir's Oil Lamp Factory

Beck's Cabinet International

Freeman's Kitchen knife Mall

McGuire's Crate Productions

Traps

Chain Lightning

Box of Brown Mold of Prosperity

Objects

Oil Lamp that is glowing

Kitchen knife that has been hollowed out

Secret Cabinet

Hidden Helmet

Watch of Prosperity

Wand of Wonder

Target appears to be 1d100 years older than he really is

People

Name Codename Career Likes Dislikes
Lillian Beck "All Eyes" Merchant Rock n' Roll Singing
Audrey Freeman "Mini Parmigianas" Mole Sharks Chili
Jasper Carlson Sad Slippers Chili
Amir Hall Police Officer Plushies Sticks
Jordyn McGuire Drunken Cats Deodorant

Cipher



                

                
 
                

                

                

                

                

                

The Fuck Is This?

After years of playing Dungeons & Dragons, I decided to make a variation where everything is improv. The DM knows as much as the players and you tell a story together - sitcom style. We use this site as a quest starter, think of some characters, and see how much we can make each other laugh.

It's designed to be simple, portable, and dependent on being creative & inventive. I wanted a framework to guide the plot forward but let us find the story. This page is just a guide to help the stories become too redundant - take as much as you want, ignore as much as you need. If you want to follow along with our adventures or read some examples, check out my personal story notes.

This concept and site was crafted by Andrew Maruska with linguistic help from Evan Stark

But how?

The Most Important Rule

Be Silly. The goal is to laugh not to have a normal adventure. Someone wants to go to the moon? Fuck yeah they do and we're going to do it with medieval technology.

Set Up

Give the players a home base, a year they want to play in, and some general ownership of the setup. It's more successful when everyone has helped create the world because when a player makes suggestions it's easier to integrate them without feeling too precious. It helps to have a figurehead that assigns the quest to authoritatively start.

Characters

90% of creating a character here is a funny voice you're forced to talk in for 3 hours. I typically have people pick one trait they want to be good at and give them a slight advantage when using that - and the same for a negative trait. Don't overcomplicate it. They wanna be a skateboarder who can't feel love? perfect. +2 to cool & -2 to social acceptance.

Rolling

This can be whatever you want but as a general rule I use d20's as a graded scale. Sometimes, I craft the roll to mimic the action i.e. if they are walking a tight rope then might need to roll a 10 because 20 & 1 make them fall to one side or the other. Rolling in D&D got boring so make it fun again.

Dungeon Master

Your goal is to say 'Yes and...' but realistically it's 'Yes and roll to see if you can actually do that triple backflip down the cliff to mount the attacking phoenix...' - It's okay to make them fail, just don't tell them no. This guide is to help you be 1 step ahead of the players but it can't know the vibe of the room, have some empathy and play to the crowd.

Ending

No one can tell you this. The guide is to help you get 1/3 of the adventure set up and the rest will be created by the adventuring party. Have fun with it and try to tie up some loose ends at the end (or don't and bring them back for another adventure).