The Director Welcomes You

Operation — Early Spaghetti

#523b62

Location

Stormy, Wet Palau

Time of Day

15:35

Extraction Point

29 Miles SE

Time to Complete

40 Hours

Silent Negotiators,
As you can see you are trapped inside approach a Touristy Mansion . We almost couldn't find you — Please explain when you get back. All we know is "Small Anteaters" is responsible and they sent us this message - "Clouds develop quickly at the Grey Hollow". Your mission was intelligence, achieve what you can.

Hopefully you still have that Clean Battery hidden on you.

— The Portable Radio you were holding self destructs.

The Villain Dossier

Name

Adalynn Garner

Alias

"Small Anteaters"

Features

6' 9"

Gray eyes

Stretch Marks / Right arm

Organization

The company of Ashy Breasts

Emotions

Concern

Personality

Questionably Broken

Motive

Take over a government for revenge

Bodyguard

Jerry the "Angry Abominable Snowman"

Physical Size

Considerable

Story

Additional Locations

The Early Reef

Underwater Forge

Imperfection Sanctuary

Random Events

Dead Animal Calls menacingly

Chanting Cult Catches leprosy

Cat Is accused by the law

Toilet Attempts to rob a bank

World

Stores

Jasmine's Doorway Outlet

Cox's Cabinet Factory

Welch's Bench Ventures

French's Flower in Vase International

Traps

Portcullis

Wall Blade of Destruction

Objects

Doorway that has been hollowed out

Bench made of heavy metal

Secret Cabinet

Hidden Necklace

Key of Destruction

Wand of Wonder

If target worships a deity, he thinks he’s that deity’s avatar

People

Name Codename Career Likes Dislikes
Sarah Cox "Blue Kidneys" Merchant Music Jazz
Nathaniel Welch "Bullet Lemons" Mole Contracts Hamsters
Mila Gray Dog surfing instructor Rubber Bands Sponges
Jasmine Owen Graphic Designer Sailboats Harmonica
Preston French Old Timer Baseball Trucks

Cipher



                

                
 
                

                

                

                

                

                

The Fuck Is This?

After years of playing Dungeons & Dragons, I decided to make a variation where everything is improv. The DM knows as much as the players and you tell a story together - sitcom style. We use this site as a quest starter, think of some characters, and see how much we can make each other laugh.

It's designed to be simple, portable, and dependent on being creative & inventive. I wanted a framework to guide the plot forward but let us find the story. This page is just a guide to help the stories become too redundant - take as much as you want, ignore as much as you need. If you want to follow along with our adventures or read some examples, check out my personal story notes.

This concept and site was crafted by Andrew Maruska with linguistic help from Evan Stark

But how?

The Most Important Rule

Be Silly. The goal is to laugh not to have a normal adventure. Someone wants to go to the moon? Fuck yeah they do and we're going to do it with medieval technology.

Set Up

Give the players a home base, a year they want to play in, and some general ownership of the setup. It's more successful when everyone has helped create the world because when a player makes suggestions it's easier to integrate them without feeling too precious. It helps to have a figurehead that assigns the quest to authoritatively start.

Characters

90% of creating a character here is a funny voice you're forced to talk in for 3 hours. I typically have people pick one trait they want to be good at and give them a slight advantage when using that - and the same for a negative trait. Don't overcomplicate it. They wanna be a skateboarder who can't feel love? perfect. +2 to cool & -2 to social acceptance.

Rolling

This can be whatever you want but as a general rule I use d20's as a graded scale. Sometimes, I craft the roll to mimic the action i.e. if they are walking a tight rope then might need to roll a 10 because 20 & 1 make them fall to one side or the other. Rolling in D&D got boring so make it fun again.

Dungeon Master

Your goal is to say 'Yes and...' but realistically it's 'Yes and roll to see if you can actually do that triple backflip down the cliff to mount the attacking phoenix...' - It's okay to make them fail, just don't tell them no. This guide is to help you be 1 step ahead of the players but it can't know the vibe of the room, have some empathy and play to the crowd.

Ending

No one can tell you this. The guide is to help you get 1/3 of the adventure set up and the rest will be created by the adventuring party. Have fun with it and try to tie up some loose ends at the end (or don't and bring them back for another adventure).