The Director Welcomes You

Operation — Chuffed Polarbear

#60ec86

Location

Sunny, Warm Colombia

Time of Day

4:54

Extraction Point

157 Miles SSE

Time to Complete

20 Hours

Operatives,
As you can see you are trapped inside the bottom of a Abandoned Reef . We almost couldn't find you — Please explain when you get back. All we know is "Left Demon" is responsible and they sent us this message - "A shrine is nearby at the Hollow oak tree". Your mission was black ops, achieve what you can.

Hopefully you still have that Beautiful Stapler hidden on you.

— The Origami Swan you were holding self destructs.

The Villain Dossier

Name

Zoe Yang

Alias

"Left Demon"

Features

6' 1"

Red eyes

A second belly button / Left foot

Organization

The Firm of Helpless Fireman

Emotions

Insulted

Personality

Monthly Incalculable

Motive

Make a lot of money to achieve their destiny

Bodyguard

Bobby the "Calm Wendigo"

Physical Size

Vast

Story

Additional Locations

The Chuffed City

Ancient House

Sanitation Carnival

Random Events

Drunk Ignites violently

Panhandler drops from the sky

Lactose Intolerance Is being tortured

Biscuit explodes

World

Stores

Cecilia's Candelabra Bureau

Guzman's Wardrobe Threads

Lloyd's Butter Churner Threads

Burns's Picture Frame Warehouse

Traps

Razor-Wire across Hallway

Flame Strike of Secrecy

Objects

Candelabra made of heavy metal

Butter Churner children's replica

Secret Wardrobe

Hidden Nipple Clamp

Blowgun of Secrecy

Wand of Wonder

Target’s nose looks like a small, clenched fist

People

Name Codename Career Likes Dislikes
Luke Guzman "Wild Dumplings" Merchant Acorns Sponges
Audrey Lloyd "Mini Hands" Mole Shirts Fire
Greyson Christensen Vision Television Christmas
Cecilia Hartman Frazzled Eggs Clocks
Rachel Burns Spirit Flashlights Rocks

Cipher



                

                
 
                

                

                

                

                

                

The Fuck Is This?

After years of playing Dungeons & Dragons, I decided to make a variation where everything is improv. The DM knows as much as the players and you tell a story together - sitcom style. We use this site as a quest starter, think of some characters, and see how much we can make each other laugh.

It's designed to be simple, portable, and dependent on being creative & inventive. I wanted a framework to guide the plot forward but let us find the story. This page is just a guide to help the stories become too redundant - take as much as you want, ignore as much as you need. If you want to follow along with our adventures or read some examples, check out my personal story notes.

This concept and site was crafted by Andrew Maruska with linguistic help from Evan Stark

But how?

The Most Important Rule

Be Silly. The goal is to laugh not to have a normal adventure. Someone wants to go to the moon? Fuck yeah they do and we're going to do it with medieval technology.

Set Up

Give the players a home base, a year they want to play in, and some general ownership of the setup. It's more successful when everyone has helped create the world because when a player makes suggestions it's easier to integrate them without feeling too precious. It helps to have a figurehead that assigns the quest to authoritatively start.

Characters

90% of creating a character here is a funny voice you're forced to talk in for 3 hours. I typically have people pick one trait they want to be good at and give them a slight advantage when using that - and the same for a negative trait. Don't overcomplicate it. They wanna be a skateboarder who can't feel love? perfect. +2 to cool & -2 to social acceptance.

Rolling

This can be whatever you want but as a general rule I use d20's as a graded scale. Sometimes, I craft the roll to mimic the action i.e. if they are walking a tight rope then might need to roll a 10 because 20 & 1 make them fall to one side or the other. Rolling in D&D got boring so make it fun again.

Dungeon Master

Your goal is to say 'Yes and...' but realistically it's 'Yes and roll to see if you can actually do that triple backflip down the cliff to mount the attacking phoenix...' - It's okay to make them fail, just don't tell them no. This guide is to help you be 1 step ahead of the players but it can't know the vibe of the room, have some empathy and play to the crowd.

Ending

No one can tell you this. The guide is to help you get 1/3 of the adventure set up and the rest will be created by the adventuring party. Have fun with it and try to tie up some loose ends at the end (or don't and bring them back for another adventure).